Ask Wolffystyle

Talk about all things related to Conquer Club

Moderators: Community Team, Global Moderators

Forum rules
Please read the community guidelines before posting.

Naked Pronouns

Postby Wolffystyle on Thu May 03, 2012 6:01 pm

Lubawski wrote:
Wolffystyle wrote:
targetman377 wrote:how has this not been moved yet :-s

Targetman377, please advise me as to what the pronoun in your sentence refers? Do you ask about the global economy or your penis? I will answer immediately.


Oh wolffy, he is clearly talking about his penis. Any time someone leaves a naked pronoun like "this" in their question, it must, by default, refer to reproductive organs.

Lubawski, you are the English teacher I never had. Thank you! I would feel more at home if your notes were handwritten in scrappy and illegible red ink; if you wrote "DQN'T EVN TR7!" atop my posts. They would be excited if you would follow me around the forums and grade every post. Also, I was talking about my private parts in the last sentence. That was really hard. But you like it. :-$
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

wolfystyle and miss cougarstyle?

Postby Wolffystyle on Thu May 03, 2012 6:23 pm

swimmerdude99 wrote:Has wolfystyle found his mate? Or is he still searching for miss cougarstyle?

Mr. Swimmerdude99, the community thanks your for your interest in Mr. wolfystyle's love life, but Mr. wolfystyle (one f, lowercase w) is not real; he was invented by the greeting card companies.

You see, along time ago, the Hegemony of the International Greeting Cards met in a secret underground lair (fit with torches and gargoyles and torture devices and whatnot, you get the picture) and devised a secret plan to create a wolfystyle to increase the global demand for greeting cards. Creating a salient image of a lone wolf, forever without mate, in the public's eyes quadrupled sales and pushed the United E-Card Conglomerate back into the red, 'where those hacks belonged'.

Because of this collusion, wolfystyle will forever be trapped and alone, buried deep inside of web of corporate lies, theft, and sappy 'Congratulations on not catching my Shingles' themed cards.

Miss cougarstyle was destined for a great mating cycle with Mr. wolfystyle, and when she was left unfulfilled she mauled and ate 3.5 school children in southern Colorado. But you don't see this information on the H.I.G.C.'s agenda, do you?
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

Re: Ask Wolffystyle

Postby jj3044 on Thu May 03, 2012 9:33 pm

... are you back?!?! ;)

If so... =D>
Image
User avatar
Brigadier jj3044
 
Posts: 512
Joined: Tue Jun 12, 2007 10:22 pm
Medals: 71
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (3) Triples Achievement (3) Quadruples Achievement (3) Terminator Achievement (2)
Assassin Achievement (1) Manual Troops Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (1) Polymorphic Achievement (1) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (2)
Fog of War Achievement (4) Trench Warfare Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2) Random Map Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (3) Beta Map Achievement (1) Battle Royale Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (4) Tournament Achievement (1)
General Achievement (6) Clan Achievement (23)

Re: Ask Wolffystyle

Postby Victor Sullivan on Fri May 04, 2012 5:40 am

Dear Wolffystyle,

Do you think the "Wild Things" are in "Where The Wild Things Are" or "General Discussion"? Or are they elsewhere?

-Sully
User avatar
Corporal Victor Sullivan
 
Posts: 7175
Joined: Mon Feb 08, 2010 8:17 pm
Location: Columbus, OH
Medals: 45
Standard Achievement (2) Doubles Achievement (1) Triples Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (3) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Manual Troops Achievement (3) Freestyle Achievement (3) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (1) Fog of War Achievement (2)
Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2) Random Map Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (1)
General Achievement (9) Map Contribution (4) Tournament Contribution (1) General Contribution (6)

What is Love?

Postby Wolffystyle on Fri May 04, 2012 9:27 am

Ninja Champion wrote:Dear Wolffystyle,

With the talk of mates, love and whatnot. I was curious, what is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me... no more.

A fabulous question Ninja Champion, and, as always, thanks for asking. I know that your question was asked in September 2011 but, even in our post-apocalyptic world of 2012, it remains pertinent. Though the talk of mates, love and whatnot has all but been buried forever, we still see signs of and evidence to the existence of such things.

2011 was a simpler time when people could freely talk about mates, love, and the all-important inclusive whatnot. The 2012-world is a little bit different, it's more complex, it contains more of this and less of this, and it also has an extra 2 in it's Gregorian year number (So, too does the current year on the Hebrew Calendar). While perplexing and convoluted, 2012 still shows traces of the existence of mates, love and whatnot and you just have to look really, really hard. Look deep. Into my eyes. Oh, I don't know, what can I do. What else can I say, it's up to you. I know we're one, just me and you. I can't go on. Whoa whoa whoa, oooh oooh...

Also, love doesn't exist in any form. Love is simply the name we give to 'the absence of hate'. So, Ninja, I don't hate you. A LOT. I won't hate you forever, and ever, and ever, and ever. I will not hate you until the end of time.
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

Love and Shampoo bottles

Postby Wolffystyle on Fri May 04, 2012 9:35 am

BYUwonder11 wrote:
Ninja Champion wrote:Dear Wolffystyle,

With the talk of mates, love and whatnot. I was curious, what is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me... no more.


Bless you my favorite Ninja for posting that after just arriving at work and listening to it on the way there. It is fate that we're a team in this great world of risk! =D>

Let Wolffystyle-san ask YOU a question, BYUwonder11, and search deep into your Soul you must. (I am assuming you drive a Kia Soul and that your Haddaway cover mixes are still hiding under its seats somewhere) Which cover version of Haddaway's What Is Love? did you listen to on that fateful morning? Did you listen to this or did you listen to this.

Also, this question is for the Universe: Am I the only one who immediately starts thinking about Shampoo Bottles when I byuwonder what is love?

Universe: "No, King Herpes does too."
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

Re: What is Love?

Postby The Voice on Fri May 04, 2012 9:52 am

Wolffystyle wrote:Though the talk of mates, love and whatnot has all but been buried forever, we still see signs of and evidence to the existence of such things.


Is your modifier dangling? If it is, are you just going to let it hang there?
Image
User avatar
Colonel The Voice
 
Posts: 808
Joined: Sat Sep 13, 2008 4:37 pm
Location: Location, Location!
Medals: 72
Standard Achievement (4) Doubles Achievement (3) Triples Achievement (3) Quadruples Achievement (3) Terminator Achievement (2)
Assassin Achievement (1) Manual Troops Achievement (3) Freestyle Achievement (2) Polymorphic Achievement (2) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (3)
Fog of War Achievement (4) Trench Warfare Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (3) Teammate Achievement (2) Random Map Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (3) Beta Map Achievement (2) Battle Royale Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (4) Tournament Achievement (2)
General Achievement (3) Clan Achievement (14) Tournament Contribution (2) General Contribution (2)

Ninja's Pants

Postby Wolffystyle on Fri May 04, 2012 10:04 am

Denise wrote:Dear Wolffystlye,

Where are Ninja's pants?

My forever estranged and star-crossed lover (read: not star-crossed hater (sometimes stylized h8ter)) Denise, with excitement I bask in the brilliance of this question. Thanks for asking it!

I must consult the stars for the answer to this questions. Hold on. Wait. Uh huh. Yep. No. Darnit! Turns out all the stars are crossed.

Now, I must resort to the scientific method to answer this question. My hypothesis is that Ninja's pants are at trapped with a genie on a deserted island. My null hypothesis is that Ninja never had pants in the first place.

Unfortunately, my mom won't let me conduct science experiments in her basement anymore so I'll have to construct a moving lab in a friend's parent's RV. Let's see. Two drops magnesium... one gallon mercury... a dash of paprika...

...add two snail's tails,
and the song of twenty whales,
the kidneys of a viscous Vampire Bat,
finish with the filmography of actor Benjamin Bratt...

Let sit for 24 hours and I'll have my conclusions tomorrow. Check back. I'd advise Ninja to check back too, as he's probably a bit chilly.
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

Re: Ask Wolffystyle

Postby Agent 86 on Fri May 04, 2012 3:26 pm

Wolf, I need to ask..did nietzsche really have phone sex with Lack, and if so who got off the most ?

http://www.conquerclub.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=170266

Just curious to see if it really happened :lol:


86
Image
User avatar
Major Agent 86
 
Posts: 1092
Joined: Mon Dec 29, 2008 6:15 pm
Location: Cone of silence
Medals: 61
Standard Achievement (4) Doubles Achievement (3) Triples Achievement (3) Quadruples Achievement (3) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Manual Troops Achievement (2) Polymorphic Achievement (1) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (1) Fog of War Achievement (4)
Trench Warfare Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (3) Teammate Achievement (2) Random Map Achievement (2) Cross-Map Achievement (3)
Ratings Achievement (2) Tournament Achievement (6) General Achievement (3) Clan Achievement (15)

Re: Ask Wolffystyle

Postby ljex on Fri May 04, 2012 5:45 pm

why did you elect to stop beginning the answer to every question with

Good question _______(insert players username here), thank you for asking it. The answer may surprise you.
User avatar
Captain ljex
 
Posts: 2943
Joined: Sat Sep 13, 2008 12:12 am
Medals: 115
Conqueror Achievement (1) Standard Achievement (4) Doubles Achievement (4) Triples Achievement (3) Quadruples Achievement (4)
Terminator Achievement (3) Assassin Achievement (3) Manual Troops Achievement (4) Freestyle Achievement (4) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (3)
Fog of War Achievement (4) Trench Warfare Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (4) Teammate Achievement (3) Random Map Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (3) Battle Royale Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (22) General Achievement (5)
Clan Achievement (12) Tournament Contribution (18) General Contribution (3)

Re: Ask Wolffystyle

Postby natty dread on Sat May 05, 2012 10:32 am

Dear Wolffystyle,

We only see the side of you that's funny and makes these funny little "Ask Alice" -type threads on GD. We see the facade you put on for the masses, the one that says "hey, it's all fun and games over here". But who are you beneath the surface? What makes you happy? What makes you sad? What are your hopes and dreams?

Who is the Real Wolffystyle?

Sincerely,
Curious Reader
Image
User avatar
Sergeant 1st Class natty dread
 
Posts: 13323
Joined: Fri Feb 08, 2008 8:58 pm
Location: just plain fucked
Medals: 49
Standard Achievement (2) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (1) Terminator Achievement (2)
Manual Troops Achievement (1) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (1) Fog of War Achievement (1) Teammate Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (3)
Ratings Achievement (3) General Achievement (12) Map Contribution (12) General Contribution (7)

Prune Alike Projections Amidst Midriffs

Postby Wolffystyle on Sat May 05, 2012 12:05 pm

Findolphin wrote:Wolffstyle? Me observes a prune alike projection amidst your midriff. What trickery is this?

What a good question, Findolphin, thanks for asking it. The answer may surprise you.

First, on behalf of Lubawski and the entire Conquer Club community, I thank you for using a naked pronoun in your question. This allows us to talk about your reproductive organs.

Second, I look at your observation. Understanding the context to this question is vitally important to solving it. You're a dolphin. Ye hath descried a prune alike projection amidst my midriff whilst I was bathing in wherever it is that dolphins also bathe. A water theme park, maybe? Swaziland? I'm gonna guess we were under water.

Third, I reference this earlier post where I explain that I do not have a belly button. It is a weakness. Therefore, this prune alike projection couldn't have been something as gross as an Owenator's outtie. No, it must've been flotsam, jetsam, or a prune itself, floating between your line of dolphin-sight and my midriff.

Finally, on to your naked pronoun and question. THAT is not a function of trickery, but rather increased blood flow due to arousal. It's science. And most likely occurred when you saw flotsam amidst my midriff. :---)
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

Re: Ninja's Pants

Postby Denise on Sat May 05, 2012 1:01 pm

Wolffystyle wrote:
Denise wrote:Dear Wolffystlye,

Where are Ninja's pants?

My forever estranged and star-crossed lover (read: not star-crossed hater (sometimes stylized h8ter)) Denise, with excitement I bask in the brilliance of this question. Thanks for asking it!

I must consult the stars for the answer to this questions. Hold on. Wait. Uh huh. Yep. No. Darnit! Turns out all the stars are crossed.

Now, I must resort to the scientific method to answer this question. My hypothesis is that Ninja's pants are at trapped with a genie on a deserted island. My null hypothesis is that Ninja never had pants in the first place.

Unfortunately, my mom won't let me conduct science experiments in her basement anymore so I'll have to construct a moving lab in a friend's parent's RV. Let's see. Two drops magnesium... one gallon mercury... a dash of paprika...

...add two snail's tails,
and the song of twenty whales,
the kidneys of a viscous Vampire Bat,
finish with the filmography of actor Benjamin Bratt...

Let sit for 24 hours and I'll have my conclusions tomorrow. Check back. I'd advise Ninja to check back too, as he's probably a bit chilly.


Dear Wolffystyle,

Please be careful. The unpredictable results of that same concoction is what enabled Pastor Samuel to track me and nearly be the instrument of my demise, back in 1692. I barely escaped Massachusetts with my life. I do appreciate your willingness to attempt such a risky experiment on my behalf. When you have the answer (and the pants), please meet me behind the huge old Elm tree about 1/2 mile east of the open field with that little stream running thru it? <<< my question. Don't tell Ninja! He owes me his share of DECSF*, and I need some leverage.

Forever your forever estranged and star-crossed lover,

Denise

* Denise's Emergency Clothing & Shoe Fund
Image
User avatar
Brigadier Denise
 
Posts: 1059
Joined: Fri Oct 09, 2009 3:43 am
Medals: 75
Standard Achievement (2) Doubles Achievement (3) Triples Achievement (3) Quadruples Achievement (3) Terminator Achievement (2)
Assassin Achievement (1) Manual Troops Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (1) Polymorphic Achievement (1) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (2)
Fog of War Achievement (3) Trench Warfare Achievement (1) Speed Achievement (1) Teammate Achievement (2) Random Map Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (3) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (12) General Achievement (6) Clan Achievement (17)
Training Achievement (5) Tournament Contribution (1)

Re: Ask Wolffystyle

Postby Army of GOD on Sat May 05, 2012 3:30 pm

Dear Wolffystyle,

what's the best way to ask natty dread out?

Love, anonymous
Image
saxitoxin wrote:This is the Platinum Lounge, you POS. People should be able to enjoy a surprise dick pic now and then.
User avatar
Cook Army of GOD
 
Posts: 5693
Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2009 4:30 pm
Location: Over the river and through the woods
Medals: 26
Standard Achievement (2) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Manual Troops Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (1) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (2) Fog of War Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (2)
Teammate Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (1) Tournament Achievement (1) General Achievement (2)
Clan Achievement (2) Tournament Contribution (1) General Contribution (1)

Re: Ask Wolffystyle

Postby Pirlo on Sat May 05, 2012 4:36 pm

Dear Wolffystyle,

What should I do if my penis got itchy in public? like in an overcrowded metro!!!
User avatar
Major Pirlo
 
Posts: 1480
Joined: Wed May 19, 2010 3:48 pm
Location: Homeless
Medals: 120
Standard Achievement (4) Doubles Achievement (4) Triples Achievement (3) Quadruples Achievement (3) Terminator Achievement (3)
Assassin Achievement (3) Manual Troops Achievement (4) Freestyle Achievement (4) Polymorphic Achievement (2) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (4)
Fog of War Achievement (4) Trench Warfare Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (3) Teammate Achievement (2) Random Map Achievement (3)
Cross-Map Achievement (3) Beta Map Achievement (1) Bot Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (4) Tournament Achievement (16)
General Achievement (10) Clan Achievement (7) Training Achievement (1) Challenge Achievement (1) Tournament Contribution (26)

Re: Ask Wolffystyle

Postby donkeymile on Sat May 05, 2012 11:11 pm

Dear Wolffystyle,

A couple of question I'd like to ask, and beg for the mercy of your wisdom to bestow itself upon them.

Last night I blasted a blank CD in my apartment. Why did the mime next door go crazy?????

Secondly, Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

And last, for now ....

A massless box is being pulled up a frictionless incline at an angle of 40º above the horizontal by a tensionless string wrapped around a massless pulley. A forceless tug is exerted on the tensionless string, causing a directionless acceleration of 3.8 turkeys per cantaloupe squared. If the massless box travels 7.293x10^0 microdoodles, what time will it be in England when the prime minister next says the word "hopscotch?"
User avatar
Captain donkeymile
 
Posts: 228
Joined: Fri Jan 23, 2009 8:10 pm
Medals: 23
Standard Achievement (4) Doubles Achievement (1) Manual Troops Achievement (2) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (4)
Trench Warfare Achievement (1) Speed Achievement (3) Cross-Map Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (4)

Re: Ask Wolffystyle

Postby Agent 86 on Sun May 06, 2012 1:29 pm

It's simple he is inundated with questions and he is god..take a card and join the queue..

86
Last edited by Agent 86 on Thu May 30, 2013 12:45 am, edited 1 time in total.
Image
User avatar
Major Agent 86
 
Posts: 1092
Joined: Mon Dec 29, 2008 6:15 pm
Location: Cone of silence
Medals: 61
Standard Achievement (4) Doubles Achievement (3) Triples Achievement (3) Quadruples Achievement (3) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Manual Troops Achievement (2) Polymorphic Achievement (1) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (1) Fog of War Achievement (4)
Trench Warfare Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (3) Teammate Achievement (2) Random Map Achievement (2) Cross-Map Achievement (3)
Ratings Achievement (2) Tournament Achievement (6) General Achievement (3) Clan Achievement (15)

The Big One

Postby Wolffystyle on Mon May 07, 2012 9:15 am

Crazyirishman wrote:Wolfy, do you know what 'the big one' that bruce is so coyly keeping to himself refers to?

Crazyirishman, a good question, thanks for asking it. The answer june surprise you.

Bruceswar had openly touted major changes in October of 2011 and he left the conquer club community with many questions, great impatience and, sexy speculation.

Wolffystyle must admit that he, himself, was amid the tumult when he guessed that Bruceswar was referring to second big bang creating a second coexistent universe or resulting in the destruction of the present universe. When Wolffystyle asked the stars, they locked their lips and threw away the keys. This only added to the expectancy.

Well, hindsight, as the Northern Irish say, is 20/20, and we've found out that Bruce was actually talking about the European Debt Crisis with specific regard to the Prime Ministry appointment of Grecian Lucas Papademos. What hadn't been exposed was that Bruceswar IS Lucas Papademos.

Foreshadowing can be seen here and here. Bruce (a.k.a. Big Bad Papa Demos) wanted the conquer club community to know that he would be heading the Greek rally out of debt in the fourth quarter of 2011. The 3D Cube is obviously a reference to Greek's exaggeration of it's debt levels.

Congratulations to Bruceswar and to his entire sovereign Greek nation. May you prosper in the near future.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(tl;dr) "The Big One" Bruce was referring to was his penis.
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

Blood as a Lubricant

Postby Wolffystyle on Mon May 07, 2012 9:39 am

Army of GOD wrote:Dear Wolffystyle,

you're trapped on a deserted island with me. Would you:

(a) have sex with me?
(b) kill me and then have sex with me, using my blood as lubricant?
(c) take the physical challenge?

natty dread wrote:Blood is not a functional lubricant, AoG!

anonymus wrote:on a side note; would that also mean that the blood from someone with hemophilia will work as a grade A lubricant?/ :?:

natty dread wrote:Well, there's only one way to find out, isn't there?

anonymus wrote:yes that is true.. ASK WOLFFYSTYLE! so? would it?/ :?:

Uhhhhh, good questions (read: scary questions) anonymus, natty dread and Army of GOD, thanks for asking them. I'm sure the answers won't surprise you.

Grouping this entire conversation into one thread is a good decision. Throwing it into the rubbish would have been a better decision, but Wolffy doesn't do that. Wolffy rescues questions from compost piles, trash bins, from hiding under rocks, from the bellies of great whales, from internet forums and from inside the minds of little boy's heads (all these places are NOT MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE).

So digging deep inside the rubbish bin in the belly of the whale which lies inside your young minds as you type in an internet forum as you lay with worms and dirt under a small rock, I have found the answers to your questions. My hands are as dirty as your minds.

Army, I have chosen (c) take the physical challenge. The physical challenge, we all knew, was 'Don't kill Army of GOD while having sex with him and still using his blood as lubricant'.

From this experience (read: rapturous ravaging romp) I have found the answer to your questions. It does turn out that AoG has hemophilia and that his blood worked as grade A lubricant. The lack of clotting mixed with the warmth of...well... Wolffy doesn't kiss and tell. So I'll leave a lot up to your imagination, which, if it's hiding under a rock, in a trash bin, or navigating the belly of an online whale, will be quite accurate.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(tl;dr) Having bloody sex with a hemophile is quite dangerous and rapturous. DO NOT TRY IT AT HOME. Try it on a deserted island.
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

Re: Ninja's Pants

Postby Wolffystyle on Mon May 07, 2012 10:04 am

Denise wrote:
Wolffystyle wrote:
Denise wrote:Dear Wolffystlye,

Where are Ninja's pants?

...Let sit for 24 hours and I'll have my conclusions tomorrow. Check back. I'd advise Ninja to check back too, as he's probably a bit chilly.


Dear Wolffystyle,

Please be careful. The unpredictable results of that same concoction is what enabled Pastor Samuel to track me and nearly be the instrument of my demise, back in 1692. I barely escaped Massachusetts with my life. I do appreciate your willingness to attempt such a risky experiment on my behalf. When you have the answer (and the pants), please meet me behind the huge old Elm tree about 1/2 mile east of the open field with that little stream running thru it? <<< my question. Don't tell Ninja! He owes me his share of DECSF*, and I need some leverage.

Forever your forever estranged and star-crossed lover,

Denise

* Denise's Emergency Clothing & Shoe Fund

Good question, Benise, thank you for asking it. The answer may surprise you.

Brop made. Reab the note dackwarbs dut replace all the bs with ds and ds with bs (I screweb something up). Sorry the pants were a dit "moist". If you folb the pants up compactly and tightly you may de adle to webge them unber your caulbron at the Coven to use them as abbed leverage. Spilling the contents of your caulbron onto Ninja Champion will bowngrabe him to Ninja Runner Up and when you boudle tap R2 you can steal his golb and use it to funb the solutions to other BECSF mysteries.

Like, what is still in Deckythedlondie's pants, or why is that man wearing a dright red cowboy hat and leopard print jock strap, or how bib I get ketchup on my febora?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(tl;br) I cannot share where Ninja's pants were. Benise has them now. They are safe. Bo not reab this sentence if you're byslexic.
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

Am I back?

Postby Wolffystyle on Wed May 09, 2012 9:50 am

jj3044 wrote:... are you back?!?! ;)

If so... =D>

jj3044, good question, and thanks for asking it. The answer may disappoint you.

I've spent the last 6 months in top secret North Korean Air Space training. My commander Choi let me out of the bowels of 해골 섬 (Haegol Seom) (Skull Island) just two weeks before my next mission to say goodbye to family and friends.

You see, as and adviser to the North Koreans under The Supreme Leader Kim Jong-eun, I have concluded that all Air-Space initiatives be Dragon focused.

Here is an image of me in testing at Haegol Seom:
Image

Unfortunately, my analysis also concludes that I will most likely die a violent dragon-related death if I am not marooned at sea on a deserted island with Army of GOD or Beckytheblondie first.

So, I am only back for a limited time. Like Emmdizzle's conqueror rank, or like a McRib.

My last request. Feed Albi for me. He's a racist dragon, but he's a good dragon nonetheless.
Image
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(tl;dr): Lyrics NSFW and Video's lyrics still NSFW
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

Where are the Wild Things?

Postby Wolffystyle on Wed May 09, 2012 10:13 am

Victor Sullivan wrote:Dear Wolffystyle,

Do you think the "Wild Things" are in "Where The Wild Things Are" or "General Discussion"? Or are they elsewhere?

-Sully

Sully, a timely question, and thank you for asking it. The answer may surprise you.

Yesterday, Maurice Sendak, the author of the children's book "Where the Wild Things Are" was finally able to rest in peace.

If you're interested in the life of Maurice Sendak and the story behind his works, here's a nice story from The Atlantic that just came out in commemoration of his life. I just read the title. Let me know if the rest of the article is any good.

Sully, you have to understand that scaring children is an incredibly fun thing to do! Yesterday, I went to the zoo, paid a sum of money to buy a ticket to sit in the fifth row of the Dolphin Show and sat back at to watch little children scream in horror when the dolphins splashed the first four rows in an act that can only be called 'vengeance'. Parents had to console bawling little children for minutes, fathers had to speedily dry off their electronics, older siblings had to recall times when dolphins were not so devilish and they had to cling on to those memories.

I laughed. Aloud. Conspicuously.

Seeing little children cry was the highlight of my trip to the zoo. I am not a bad person, Sully. I am a person. I am a person who understands that scaring little children is a propitious act.

My point is, then, that the Wild Things are everywhere. They are in all of our forums, in our dreams, in our questions, in our answers, in our nightmares. They are in our shampoo bottles. The Wild Things are ubiquitous and so are Maurice Sendak's stories.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
tl;dr: Maurice Sendak's wildest thing was a dolphin, censored from his book, but it remains fervently alive inside the cracks of your electronics.
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

Dangling Modifiers

Postby Wolffystyle on Wed May 09, 2012 10:27 am

The Voice wrote:
Wolffystyle wrote:Though the talk of mates, love and whatnot has all but been buried forever, we still see signs of and evidence to the existence of such things.


Is your modifier dangling? If it is, are you just going to let it hang there?

A good question, The Voice. Thank you for asking it, the answer may surprise you.

Answering your question, my modifier is dangling for the entire world to see. (<---And that modifier is not dangling).

I'm just gonna let it hang there, answer all my questions for me, and we'll see who it impresses.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
tl;dr: Everyone go buy The Voice's book "Lobbying for the Grey American" which, SPOILER ALERT, has not a single dangling modifier.
Image
moe wrote:Matted with hair, armed to the teeth, swift as the noble beast his screen name so "lovingly" embodies.. . ..

Wielding a hot dog in one hand and a fedora in the other. . . . .
User avatar
Brigadier Wolffystyle
 
Posts: 271
Joined: Tue May 06, 2008 10:01 pm
Location: Chicago
Medals: 30
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (3) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (2) Teammate Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (2) Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (2) Clan Achievement (2)

Re: Ask Wolffystyle

Postby ManBungalow on Thu May 23, 2013 3:48 pm

Dear Wolffystyle,

How long is too long?

Thanks in advance.
Image
User avatar
Colonel ManBungalow
 
Posts: 3333
Joined: Sun Jan 13, 2008 7:02 am
Location: On a giant rock orbiting a star somewhere
Medals: 84
Standard Achievement (4) Doubles Achievement (4) Triples Achievement (3) Quadruples Achievement (3) Terminator Achievement (2)
Assassin Achievement (2) Manual Troops Achievement (3) Freestyle Achievement (4) Polymorphic Achievement (1) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (2)
Fog of War Achievement (4) Trench Warfare Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (4) Teammate Achievement (2) Random Map Achievement (2)
Cross-Map Achievement (3) Beta Map Achievement (1) Battle Royale Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (4) Tournament Achievement (2)
General Achievement (10) Clan Achievement (12) Tournament Contribution (3) General Contribution (6)

Re: Ask Wolffystyle

Postby Funkyterrance on Thu May 30, 2013 12:03 am

Do you Party?
Image
User avatar
Colonel Funkyterrance
 
Posts: 1929
Joined: Wed Jan 19, 2011 10:52 pm
Location: New Hampshire, USA
Medals: 22
Standard Achievement (2) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (2) Manual Troops Achievement (1)
Freestyle Achievement (1) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (1) Teammate Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (1)
Ratings Achievement (3) Clan Achievement (3) General Contribution (1)

PreviousNext

Return to General Discussion

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users

Login