We should like to assure you, fruits of my overly productive loins, that We did not apply pressure to the power button of the mechanism which drives the war fought with wordy weapons traditionally known as spam. However, the situation being as it is at the present time, We have decided that now is the perfect moment for an artful assembly of food products such as meat, cheese, and vegetables, placed between two strips of an aged wheat and yeast mixture, the lack of which has caused many conflicts and actions that greatly impacted the present world. For this delightful assortment of foods, which as parts are perhaps nothing worth worshiping, is in fact as a whole manifold times greater than the sum of its parts, such that each individual one of these divine creations are in fact more powerful than a god of antiquity; and the present time is the perfect time for We to bring one more of these awesome assortments together, so that We may grip its outer layers between Our digits and raise this venerable object high, high, higher! until it reaches Our venerable orifice of ingestion, at which time We shall remove all distinction between the individual components of the noble assembly of foods so that it truly becomes one; for only in this state may it pass through the various tubes that reside underneath Our epidermis. Thus strengthened by that glorious prince of foods, We shall proceed to hurl Our sharp spears, sculpted with the characters of the Roman alphabet in the form of many, if not most, of the sounds the waves of which are generated within Our larynx, whose meanings, like steel tips, shall pierce the hearts of Our opponents; it shall be the power of the artful assembly of food products such as meat, cheese, and vegetables that shall drive Us forward into glorious victory!