Gentle Revolution [15 Feb 2012]

[tokle]

"flew into fall of the reign of the communist party".
I think you need to rephrase thaat sentence. I don't quite get what it's trying to say.

present time: flow into (culminate in)...

I will need help with english

Oneyed

Maybe something like "led to the fall of the communist party"?

[thehippo8]

Two possibilities for you:

A peaceful demonstration organized by Slovak students in Bratislava - during November 16, 1989 - sparked demonstrations all over Czechoslovakia and brought about the revolution against communist totalitarianism and the downfall of the Communist Party of Czechoslovakia.

November 16, 1989: A peaceful rally by Bratislava students sparked revolution throughout Czechoslovakia resulting in the collapse of the Communist Party of Czechoslovakia and the end to communist totalitarianism.

I can't say either is perfect. The first is grammatically correct but the second a bit more dramatic! I'm not suggesting you choose either, but they may help you work out what you are trying to express.

One final one ...

November 16, 1989: Bratislava rally sparks revolution and the collapse of the Communist Party of Czechoslovakia.

Removes the bits that are cumbersome.

Still looking at the map itswelf, but liking what I see so far.

[Dukasaur]

November 16, 1989: Bratislava student rally sparks revolution and the collapse of the Communist Party of Czechoslovakia.

Added "student" to the above and I think you've got it.

[Oneyed]

many thanks guys for help.

if there is more wrong text or if it is something unclear it would be great if somebody will edit my text...

will do changes by yours advices soon, just now I work on Fragmentaton of CSFR map...

ones more thanks to everybody.

Oneyed

[Oneyed]

edited text by thehippo advice. also changed symbol for "square", now it better fit with public security symbol.

Click image to enlarge.

Oneyed

[thehippo8]

Too funny, I thought that Duke's suggestion was good, but it's your map!! The wording suggested was:

November 16, 1989: Bratislava student rally sparks revolution and the collapse of the Communist Party of Czechoslovakia.

[natty dread]

The dissident symbols need to be redone...

[Oneyed]

Too funny, I thought that Duke's suggestion was good, but it's your map!! The wording suggested was:

November 16, 1989: Bratislava student rally sparks revolution and the collapse of the Communist Party of Czechoslovakia.

looks too short for me. but if this is correct "true" english version ok.

The dissident symbols need to be redone...

this is the original symbol of Slovak revolutionary movement. what is wrong?

Oneyed

[thehippo8]

Too funny, I thought that Duke's suggestion was good, but it's your map!! The wording suggested was:

November 16, 1989: Bratislava student rally sparks revolution and the collapse of the Communist Party of Czechoslovakia.

looks too short for me. but if this is correct "true" english version ok.

The dissident symbols need to be redone...

this is the original symbol of Slovak revolutionary movement. what is wrong?

Oneyed

Please don't think that I am telling you what to do! If you want to keep your current text I add a couple of corrections for grammatical correctness. You missed the comma after students and I think the sentence needs to be broken up. Here's my suggestion:

A peaceful demonstration organized by Slovak students, during November 16, 1989, sparked demonstrations all over Chechoslovakia. It brought about the revolution against communist totalitarianism and the downfall of the Communist Party of Chechoslovakia.

As to the re-doing of the symbols - you are correct as to that is what they should look like but your graphics are not up to par. You need to make them clearer using a graphics editor or restart them again.

[Oneyed]

Please don't think that I am telling you what to do!

it is great that you help me. and also others guys, ofcourse

new version with edited text and new symbol for dissidents

Click image to enlarge.

Oneyed

[tokle]

You don't really need to have an essay on there. It would look better if the text was as short as possible.

It could be as simple as:
"Student rallies spark revolution and the collapse of the communist regime."

You already have the info that it is in Bratislava and that it is November 1989 written above, so the text doesn't need to include that.

[thehippo8]

You don't really need to have an essay on there. It would look better if the text was as short as possible.

It could be as simple as:
"Student rallies spark revolution and the collapse of the communist regime."

You already have the info that it is in Bratislava and that it is November 1989 written above, so the text doesn't need to include that.

I agree. But if you do want the longer one then the comma belongs after the "students" and before the "during"!!

[Dukasaur]

Yeah, but it's a pain to deal with, because the high-ASCII characters that are needed don't fall into the alphabet in the expected places.

You get situations like on Nordic Nations, if you forget that Aland with the loop comes at the end of the alphabet instead of at the beginning, you are trying to attack from Aland, and you go to the attack pull-down and it's not there. Eventually you realize it's at the bottom, but at first you find yourself going up and down the pull-down thinking, "Am I crazy? Do I or do I not own Aland? Where the hell did it go?"

Å, Ä and Ö are exactly where they're supposed to be, though. They officially do come after Z in the Finnish & Scandinavian alphabets.

I realize they're in the right place. Still, it's confusing to those of us who aren't accustomed to working with them.

Besides, now that there's clickable maps, the concern is moot anyway. You can just click on the region you want to attack to/from.

It's tough to teach an old dog new tricks. Maybe if there were clicable maps when I joined CC, I would have learned to use them, but I learned to use the pull-downs, and once I find a system that works I'm extrememly reluctant to try something else.

And before you dismiss me as an just old fuddy-duddy, you should be made aware that the statistic is that 34% of CC users have never used clickies.

[Dukasaur]

guys thanks to everybody for inputs, feedbacks and nice words .
about ˇ´, I will use them, I for example like nordic characters and I think I can show something from my country, language to all people.

Dukasaur, Dušan is so Slovak/Czech name so you must be from here originaly

Yes. Note that my avatar has two flags, not one.

Too funny, I thought that Duke's suggestion was good, but it's your map!! The wording suggested was:

November 16, 1989: Bratislava student rally sparks revolution and the collapse of the Communist Party of Czechoslovakia.

looks too short for me. but if this is correct "true" english version ok.

The nice thing about English is that it's very flexible. There is rarely just one correct way to say something; most of the time you can choose from many equally-valid alternatives.

But on this I think you should trust me. I spent seven years editing political newsletters, back in the days before computers, when we had to pay typesetters by the word, and devising ways to say the same thing in fewer words is something I'm very good at. Nowadays people are lazy, they can copy and paste entire encyclopeadias, and word economy is rare. But it's still worth practising. People have a short attention span, and the fewer words your description uses, the more likely it is to be well-recieved.

[koontz1973]

But on this I think you should trust me. I spent seven years editing political newsletters, back in the days before computers, when we had to pay typesetters by the word, and devising ways to say the same thing in fewer words is something I'm very good at. Nowadays people are lazy, they can copy and paste entire encyclopeadias, and word economy is rare. But it's still worth practising. People have a short attention span, and the fewer words your description uses, the more likely it is to be well-recieved.

Fewer words is always the better option. Used to hate my father when at school he would take an essay of a 1000 words and cut it down to 500.