Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

\\OFF-TOPIC// conversations about everything that has nothing to do with Conquer Club.

Moderators: Global Moderators, Community Team

Forum rules
Please read the Community Guidelines before posting.

Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

Postby Army of GOD on Fri Feb 22, 2013 3:10 am

I see a need in the past for professional critics. Not everybody could watch a movie and then give their opinions about it, so critics were needed to voice their opinion on the movie thus giving people a decision.

But in the age of the internet, am I the only one who thinks they're just god damn tiresome?

Here's an example: Even though I don't like the site very much, Rotten Tomatoes at least shows the difference between "critics'" scores and the audience's score. For one of my chlidhood favorites, The Mighty Ducks, the critics gave it a 12% and the audience gave it a 64%. I mean, really? Isn't the tyranny of the majority more reliable than a few jerks who don't even know the true meaning of Christmas?

Plus, every half-educated punk with an English degree can pull a review of the film on IMDB without getting money for it. I say we lynch them all.
Image
User avatar
Cook Army of GOD
 
Posts: 5920
Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2009 4:30 pm
Location: ด้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็
Medals: 26
Standard Achievement (2) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Manual Troops Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (1) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (2) Fog of War Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (2)
Teammate Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (1) Tournament Achievement (1) General Achievement (2)
Clan Achievement (2) Tournament Contribution (1) General Contribution (1)

Re: Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

Postby Army of GOD on Fri Feb 22, 2013 3:13 am

Here's a gem from a "critic" on the second Mighty Ducks movie (which scored 40% higher with the audience):
Non-stop commercialism and a bunch of boring hockey stuff.


Sounds suspiciously like xeno.
Image
User avatar
Cook Army of GOD
 
Posts: 5920
Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2009 4:30 pm
Location: ด้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็
Medals: 26
Standard Achievement (2) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Manual Troops Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (1) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (2) Fog of War Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (2)
Teammate Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (1) Tournament Achievement (1) General Achievement (2)
Clan Achievement (2) Tournament Contribution (1) General Contribution (1)

Re: Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

Postby xeno on Fri Feb 22, 2013 4:02 am

You caught me! In between baby killing and wife stealing I double as a cynical movie critic. But seriously it's well known these people hate life and everything about it. Unless your movie starts with toy and ends with story in which case that movie can do no wrong. I don't get it. I know because I used to frequent the rotten tomatoe forums before they banned me for spamming all their narcissistic movie bullshit threads
Image
User avatar
Cadet xeno
 
Posts: 131
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2007 9:28 pm
Location: Colbert Nation
Medals: 15
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (1) Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (2)
Speed Achievement (3) Teammate Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (3)

Re: Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

Postby BigBallinStalin on Fri Feb 22, 2013 4:24 am

What I like about user reviews, the so-called amateurs, is that they tend to communicate more directly. They provide more useful commentary on why I should or shouldn't watch a film--because that's what I'm looking for before I decide to watch the film.

If I want an in-depth analysis of a film, then I'll turn to the professional critics, but I'm not really interested in that, so to hell with them.


Give me 10% of what the film is about, and the rest should be about whythey enjoyed or disliked it. The professionals don't seem to do this.
User avatar
Colonel BigBallinStalin
 
Posts: 4824
Joined: Sun Oct 26, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: crying into the dregs of an empty bottle of own-brand scotch on the toilet having a dump in Dagenham
Medals: 48
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (3) Triples Achievement (3) Quadruples Achievement (3) Terminator Achievement (1)
Manual Troops Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (1) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (1) Fog of War Achievement (4) Trench Warfare Achievement (1)
Teammate Achievement (2) Random Map Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (3) Beta Map Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (4)
Tournament Achievement (5) General Achievement (1) Clan Achievement (10)

Re: Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

Postby Haggis_McMutton on Fri Feb 22, 2013 8:30 am

Army of GOD wrote:I say we lynch them all.


Wait, what about the 12% that agree with you?
Highest score: 3063; Highest position: 67;
Winner of {World War II tournament, -team 2010 Skilled Diversity, [FuN||Chewy]-[XII] USA};
8-3-7
User avatar
Major Haggis_McMutton
 
Posts: 397
Joined: Sun Mar 26, 2006 11:32 am
Medals: 28
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (1) Triples Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (2)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (2) Fog of War Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (3)
Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (3) General Achievement (4)

Re: Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

Postby nietzsche on Fri Feb 22, 2013 2:03 pm

BigBallinStalin wrote:What I like about user reviews, the so-called amateurs, is that they tend to communicate more directly. They provide more useful commentary on why I should or shouldn't watch a film--because that's what I'm looking for before I decide to watch the film.

If I want an in-depth analysis of a film, then I'll turn to the professional critics, but I'm not really interested in that, so to hell with them.


Give me 10% of what the film is about, and the rest should be about whythey enjoyed or disliked it. The professionals don't seem to do this.


Except in Amazon. where the so called user reviews are sometimes advertising. It was so great that you could trust Amazon reviews in the past, now you have to be a detective too.
betiko wrote:it really hurt. I learned a few years later that I was doing it wrong, i was inserting them in my anus

DoomYoshi wrote:ffs nietzche, sitting in the library at school and bam - vaginas all over the screen

betiko wrote:Saxi, you have rotten balls necrosing your sack.
User avatar
Captain nietzsche
 
Posts: 2159
Joined: Sun Feb 11, 2007 1:29 am
Location: Fantasy Cooperstown
Medals: 41
Standard Achievement (4) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (1) Terminator Achievement (2)
Assassin Achievement (2) Manual Troops Achievement (2) Freestyle Achievement (3) Polymorphic Achievement (2) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (2)
Fog of War Achievement (4) Trench Warfare Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (4) Teammate Achievement (2) Cross-Map Achievement (2)
Battle Royale Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (3) General Contribution (1)

Re: Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

Postby AndyDufresne on Fri Feb 22, 2013 2:30 pm

Very rarely do I look to see what a professional critic is saying about a movie, but sometimes it is interesting to read their views. Really though, I am the type of person that loves going into a movie not really knowing much more than maybe who is in it, and the title. Since that is often difficult to do with domestic movies of recent issue, I usually like going back to older films and foreign films.

However, when it comes to Video Games, I am quite a bit likely to read a few professional reviews to get a sense if there are any big nuggets of information consistent across said reviews.

BigBallinStalin wrote:Give me 10% of what the film is about, and the rest should be about whythey enjoyed or disliked it. The professionals don't seem to do this.

Roger Ebert I think actually does this pretty well.


--Andy
User avatar
Corporal AndyDufresne
Retired Administrator
 
Posts: 25689
Joined: Fri Mar 03, 2006 8:22 pm
Location: A Banana Palm in Zihuatanejo
Medals: 20
Standard Achievement (2) Doubles Achievement (1) Triples Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (1) Terminator Achievement (1)
Freestyle Achievement (1) Fog of War Achievement (1) Trench Warfare Achievement (1) Speed Achievement (1) Teammate Achievement (1)
Cross-Map Achievement (3) General Achievement (4) General Contribution (2)

Re: Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

Postby muy_thaiguy on Fri Feb 22, 2013 5:46 pm

Nostalgia Critic?
I am what I am.


What, you expected something deep or flashy?
User avatar
Private 1st Class muy_thaiguy
 
Posts: 11601
Joined: Fri May 18, 2007 11:20 am
Location: Back in Black
Medals: 10
Standard Achievement (1) Doubles Achievement (1) Triples Achievement (2) Quadruples Achievement (2) Freestyle Achievement (1)
Fog of War Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (1) Clan Achievement (1)

Re: Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

Postby Haggis_McMutton on Fri Feb 22, 2013 7:39 pm

muy_thaiguy wrote:Nostalgia Critic?


Highest score: 3063; Highest position: 67;
Winner of {World War II tournament, -team 2010 Skilled Diversity, [FuN||Chewy]-[XII] USA};
8-3-7
User avatar
Major Haggis_McMutton
 
Posts: 397
Joined: Sun Mar 26, 2006 11:32 am
Medals: 28
Standard Achievement (3) Doubles Achievement (1) Triples Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (2)
Assassin Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (2) Fog of War Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (3)
Ratings Achievement (3) Tournament Achievement (3) General Achievement (4)

Re: Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

Postby Army of GOD on Fri Feb 22, 2013 11:41 pm

BigBallinStalin wrote:Give me 10% of what the film is about, and the rest should be about whythey enjoyed or disliked it. The professionals don't seem to do this.


Meh, I don't even want 10%.

I don't know about everyone else but my reference for every movie that isn't in theaters is IMDB. If a movie is a 7+ (rating, obviously) on IMDB, I'll watch it. Otherwise, it can wait.

For movies in the theaters, unless it catches my eye (Django, for example), it probably isn't worth shelling out money for.
Image
User avatar
Cook Army of GOD
 
Posts: 5920
Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2009 4:30 pm
Location: ด้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็
Medals: 26
Standard Achievement (2) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (2) Terminator Achievement (1)
Manual Troops Achievement (1) Freestyle Achievement (1) Nuclear Spoils Achievement (2) Fog of War Achievement (2) Speed Achievement (2)
Teammate Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (1) Ratings Achievement (1) Tournament Achievement (1) General Achievement (2)
Clan Achievement (2) Tournament Contribution (1) General Contribution (1)

Re: Professional critics: seriously, f*ck them.

Postby Funkyterrance on Sat Feb 23, 2013 1:14 am

Army of GOD wrote:I see a need in the past for professional critics. Not everybody could watch a movie and then give their opinions about it, so critics were needed to voice their opinion on the movie thus giving people a decision.

But in the age of the internet, am I the only one who thinks they're just god damn tiresome?

Here's an example: Even though I don't like the site very much, Rotten Tomatoes at least shows the difference between "critics'" scores and the audience's score. For one of my chlidhood favorites, The Mighty Ducks, the critics gave it a 12% and the audience gave it a 64%. I mean, really? Isn't the tyranny of the majority more reliable than a few jerks who don't even know the true meaning of Christmas?

Plus, every half-educated punk with an English degree can pull a review of the film on IMDB without getting money for it. I say we lynch them all.


A critic tends to gauge the quality of a movie, as a movie, while the audience tends to gauge the likeability of a movie for whatever reason. People who watched mighty ducks 4 growing up are likely to enjoy the movie but a critic will tell you how well it's made. They are considered experts in their field and meant to be a guiding light in respect to film. Nobody is going to tell you what to enjoy but don't assume the average viewer can tell the difference between shit and shinola.
Image
User avatar
Colonel Funkyterrance
 
Posts: 1973
Joined: Wed Jan 19, 2011 10:52 pm
Location: New Hampshire, USA
Medals: 22
Standard Achievement (2) Doubles Achievement (2) Triples Achievement (1) Quadruples Achievement (2) Manual Troops Achievement (1)
Freestyle Achievement (1) Fog of War Achievement (3) Speed Achievement (1) Teammate Achievement (1) Cross-Map Achievement (1)
Ratings Achievement (3) Clan Achievement (3) General Contribution (1)


Return to Babble-On Five

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users

Login