Medieval Talk

[Navyblue4u]

YE BEEP! by The Pussycat Wenches

Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha
Ha, ha-ha, ha
Ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha
Ha, ha-ha, ha

[Tis Will I Am]
Tis funny how a brute only ponders about the...
Thou hast a real big heart, but I'm gazing at thy...
Thou hast real whopping brains, but I'm gazing at thy...
Maid, there canst be no pain in me gazing at thy...

[PC Wenches]


I care not a...
Continue gazing at my...
For it meaneth not a thing if thou gazest at my...
I shall do my thang whilst thou playeth with thy...
Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha

Every lad's the same
Aforetime the seventh grade
They hast attempted courting me
Attempting to (Ha, ha-ha, ha, ha-ha)
They deviseth all a plan
To be my one and only man
Aspireth to grasp me with their hands
Desireth to (Ha, ha-ha, ha, ha-ha)
I continually shun them down
Alas, they persist to come around
Asking me to trek around
Tis not the form it's going down

For they only want
Soley fancy my ha, ha-ha
Ha, ha-ha
Soley fancy what they want
But, nay, ah-ah
Nay, ah-ah

[Tis Will I Am anon]
Tis funny how a brute only ponders about the...
Thou hast a real big heart, but I'm gazing at thy...
Thou hast real whopping brains, but I'm gazing at thy...
Maid, there canst be no pain in me gazing at thy...

[PC Wenches]
I care not a...
Continue gazing at my...
For it meaneth not a thing if thou gazest at my...
I shall do my thang whilst thou playeth with thy...
Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha

Dost thou know that no
Shan't mean yes, it means no
So hinder thyself, pause a minute
Allow me bring my two pence in it
One, scarce be patient
Quit thy rushing
Akin thou art anxious
Likewise two, thou art too aggressive
Labouring to receive thy (Ahh)

Dost thou know that I know?
And I desireth not to go there

Soley want
Soley fancy my ha, ha-ha
Ha, ha-ha
Soley fancy what they want
But, nay, ah-ah
Nay, ah-ah

[Tis Will I Am anon]
Tis funny how a brute only ponders about the...
Thou hast a real big heart, but I'm gazing at thy...
Thou hast real whopping brains, but I'm gazing at thy...
Maid, there canst be no pain in me gazing at thy...

[PC Wenches]
I care not a...
Continue gazing at my...
For it meaneth not a thing if thou gazest at my...
I shall do my thang whilst thou playeth with thy...
Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha

Boomp-boomp, Omp-omp
Boomp, boomp-boomp
Boomp-boomp, Omp-omp
Boomp, boomp-boomp
[Replays once more]

[PC Wenches]
Ooh, thou hast it bad I canst tell
Thou desireth it bad, Alas! oh well
Ape, what thou hast for me
Tis something I
Something I dost not need
Behold!


Thou knowest the rest!

Pussycat wenches. LOL Good one luns.

[KomradeKloininov]

This all doesn't seem like real old English, just people adding eth to the end of everything they say or talking about old things. I can find some real old English in just a second.

[KomradeKloininov]

Here it is, an excerpt from The Canterbury Tales:

" Whilom, as olde stories tellen us,
Ther was a duc that highte Theseus;
Of Atthenes he was lord and governour,
And in his tyme swich a conquerour,
5 That gretter was ther noon under the sonne.
Ful many a riche contree hadde he wonne,
What with his wysdom and his chivalrie;
He conquered al the regne of Femenye,
That whilom was ycleped Scithia,
10 And weddede the queene Ypolita,
And broghte hir hoom with hym in his contree,
With muchel glorie and greet solempnytee,
And eek hir yonge suster Emelye.
And thus with victorie and with melodye
15 Lete I this noble duc to Atthenes ryde,
And al his hoost, in armes hym bisyde."

[luns101]

This all doesn't seem like real old English, just people adding eth to the end of everything they say or talking about old things. I can find some real old English in just a second.

Do ye wish to fracture this thread and tear it asunder?

[Dancing Mustard]

Do ye wish-eth to fracture this-eth thread and tear-eth it asunder? Eth

Fixed for KK's benefit...

[Minister Masket]

Methinks thou peasants have-eth too much time on thine hands....eth.

My barons will be killing you now. Eth.

[The1exile]

Blue Orchide by Ye Olde White Stripes

Thou got a reaction
Thou got a reaction, didst thous not?
Thou took a white orchid
Thou took a orchide blanche and turned it blue
This thing better than nothing
This thing is better than naught to give up
We all need to do something
Try to keep the truth from showing up

How dare ye
How dost thou dare now, anyway
How dare ye
How dost thou dare now, anyway
How dare ye
How dost thou dare now, anyway

Thou art given a flower
But I suppose that thou art hard to please
Sour art your lip
But though think that it's just me teasing you
Thou got a reaction
Thou got a reaction, did ye not
Thou took the white orchid
Thou took the orchide blanche and turned it blue

Get behind me
Get behind me now anyway
Get behind me
Get behind me now anyway
Get behind me
Get behind me now anyway

Thou got a reaction
Thou got a reaction, did ye not
Thou took the white orchid
Thou took the orchide blanche and turned it blue

This rendition brought to you by ye olde amateur bard of the Funny Farm. Don't clap, throw money!

[luns101]

Blue Orchide by Ye Olde White Stripes

Thou got a reaction
Thou got a reaction, didst thous not?
Thou took a white orchid
Thou took a orchide blanche and turned it blue
This thing better than nothing
This thing is better than naught to give up
We all need to do something
Try to keep the truth from showing up

How dare ye
How dost thou dare now, anyway
How dare ye
How dost thou dare now, anyway
How dare ye
How dost thou dare now, anyway

Thou art given a flower
But I suppose that thou art hard to please
Sour art your lip
But though think that it's just me teasing you
Thou got a reaction
Thou got a reaction, did ye not
Thou took the white orchid
Thou took the orchide blanche and turned it blue

Get behind me
Get behind me now anyway
Get behind me
Get behind me now anyway
Get behind me
Get behind me now anyway

Thou got a reaction
Thou got a reaction, did ye not
Thou took the white orchid
Thou took the orchide blanche and turned it blue

This rendition brought to you by ye olde amateur bard of the Funny Farm. Don't clap, throw money!

Well done. For extra credit...convert it to pirate language.

[The1exile]

Well done. For extra credit...convert it to pirate language.

Auch... a challenge, is it? Well, have at ye, ye foul blaggart!

You got a reaction
Ye got a reaction didna, ye?
Ye tookst a white orchid
Ye tookst a white orchid turned 't blue

Somethin' better than nothin'
Somethin' better than nothin', 'tis givin' up
We all need t' do somethin'
Try keep th' truth from showin' up

How dare ye
How old be ye now, anyway?
How dare ye
How old be ye now, anyway?

Ye`re gi'en a flower
But I guess thar`s jus' nay pleasin' ye
Yer lips taste sour
But ye think that 'tis jus' me teasin' ye

Ye got a reaction
Ye got a reaction, didna ye?
Ye tookst a white orchid
Ye tookst a white orchid turned 't blue

Get behind me
Get behind me now, anyway
Get behind me
Get behind me now, anyway

Ye got a reaction
Ye got a reaction, didna ye?
Ye tookst a white orchid
Ye tookst a white orchid turned 't blue

[luns101]

Well done. For extra credit...convert it to pirate language.

Auch... a challenge, is it? Well, have at ye, ye foul blaggart!

You got a reaction
Ye got a reaction didna, ye?
Ye tookst a white orchid
Ye tookst a white orchid turned 't blue

Somethin' better than nothin'
Somethin' better than nothin', 'tis givin' up
We all need t' do somethin'
Try keep th' truth from showin' up

How dare ye
How old be ye now, anyway?
How dare ye
How old be ye now, anyway?

Ye`re gi'en a flower
But I guess thar`s jus' nay pleasin' ye
Yer lips taste sour
But ye think that 'tis jus' me teasin' ye

Ye got a reaction
Ye got a reaction, didna ye?
Ye tookst a white orchid
Ye tookst a white orchid turned 't blue

Get behind me
Get behind me now, anyway
Get behind me
Get behind me now, anyway

Ye got a reaction
Ye got a reaction, didna ye?
Ye tookst a white orchid
Ye tookst a white orchid turned 't blue

[KomradeKloininov]

Do ye wish-eth to fracture this-eth thread and tear-eth it asunder? Eth

Fixed for KK's benefit...

Wow! People listening to my comments! Normally I'm just regarded as that crazy communist at the back of the room, brooding over trivialities and going on and on and on, who will reprimand any capitalist comment in or near his presence, with his nose in classic novels who no one else would be willing to read like War and Peace or Crime and Punishment while making notes on them referring to my often questioned beliefs and getting quite annoyed at the slightest little mistake in the text and going on and on and on about it and making everyone annoyed in turn at me.

You know what I mean? I've talked myself out.

[I GOT SERVED]

Fergalicious- Fergie


Here ye, hear ye! All thy gentle folk listen!, Because this is it
This beat that thy tis bangin' is delicious


Thy definition of "Fergalicious", it makes all thy gentlefolk go "loco"
All thy gentlefolk want ye treasure, so thou canst get thy pleasure from thy photograph
Thou could hast seen me, but thou canst squeeze me.
I am not easy, and I am most certainly not sleazy
Thou hast plentiful reasons why thy teases them.
Thy gentlefolk just cometh and goeth like seasons.


Fergalicious (so delicious)
But thou most certainly am not promiscuous.
And if thou wast suspicious,
All this fecal matter is fictitious.
I blow kisses (mmmwwahhh)
That puts all of thy gentlefolk on thy rocks, thy rocks.
And all of thy gentlefolk be lining up down thy block just so thou canst watch what thou hast got (four, tres, two, uno)


Yes, it is most delicious (it is most incredibly hot, very hot)
Again, tis most delicious (thou hast placed thy gentlefolk on thy rocks, thy rocks)
It still is most delicious (thy gentlefolk would very much like a taste of what thou hast)
Thou is Fergalicious (t-t-t-t-t-tis most tasty, tasty)


Fergalicious def-,
Fergalicious def-,
Fergalicious def- ["def" is echoing]
Thy definition of Fergalicious is to make all of thy gentlefolk go crazy.
Thou always claimest that thou hast known me,
Thy gentlefolk are always coming to thou and thy callest thou Stacy (Hey, Stacy),
Thou is the F to the E, R, G, the I, the E,
And no other peasant can put it down like thou.


Thou est Fergalicious (Tis o so delicious)
Thou body shall stay vicious
Thou est always be up in the local watering hole, just working on thoust fitness
Thy local peasant est my witness (oooh, wee)
Thou hast put your gentlefolk on thy rocks, thy rocks
And all of thy gentlefolk hast lined down thy local trading route just to watch what thou hast (four, tres, two, uno)


Yes, it is most delicious (it is most incredibly hot, very hot)
Again, tis most delicious (thou hast placed thy gentlefolk on thy rocks, thy rocks)
It still is most delicious (thy gentlefolk would very much like a taste of what thou hast)
Thou is Fergalicious (t-t-t-t-t-tis most tasty, tasty)


Baby, baby, baby,
If thou hast a great desire to want me,
Honey, thou must receive some patience.
Maybe then thou might graciously receive a taste.
It shall be tasty, o so tasty,
I shall be laced with greatest of lacey.
It shall be o so tasty, o so tasty,
It shall make thou go crazy.


T to thy A, to thy S T E Y - kind lady, thou est tasty, T to thy A to tht S T E Y - kind lady, thous est o so tasty
D to thy E, to thy L I C I O U S, to tht D, to thy E, to thy, to thy, to thy, hit it Fergie


All the time thou turneth around thy gentlefolk gather round, thou est always looking at thou up and down, gawking at my (uuhh)

Thou would just like to say it now - Thou est not trying to round up drama, small mother, I don't wanna take your kind peasant.

And thou knowest thou est appearing to be-eth just a little bit conceited and thou keepest on repeating how thy gentlefolk would like to eat it.

But thou est trying very hard to tell, that thou absolutely cannot be treated like a clientele
Because thy all say she est...


Yes, tis quite delicious (o so delicious)
But thou am not promiscuous
And if thou wast suspicious
All of this fecal matter is fictitious
Thou blowest kisses (mmmwwahhh)
That places thy gentlefolk on thy rocks, thy rocks
And thy gentlefolk are lining down thy local trading route just to watch what thou hast (hast, hast, hast)

Four, tres, two, uno.
Thou est Fergalicious (Tis o so delicious)
Thou body shall stay vicious
Thou est always be up in the local watering hole, just working on thoust fitness
Thy local peasant est my witness (oooh, wee)
Thou hast put your gentlefolk on thy rocks, thy rocks
And all of thy gentlefolk hast lined down thy local trading route just to watch what thou hast (four, tres, two, uno)

[The1exile]

Well done IGS!

Now mine own humble submission to this ragtag group of bards:

The f*ck Stops Here by Reggie and the Full Effect (can't translate this bit)

Thou said thy dost it for the money
Thou think thine friends will need thou now
Thou said it felt that so was ready
I’m sorry now thou hast got to catch thine rear and pass away

There’s no apologies
I’ll be around thou wait and see

Thou should have let your kind of me shred
Thine attire and manner to me look fine
So tell me what is all this disturbance
Screw you and all your world thou shalt never get the time

There’s no apologies
I’ll be around thou wait and see
Thou sailing floating in the air
Don’t try explaining lady I don’t care
(You’re not a lady, don’t act like a lady)
There’s no apologies
I’ll be around thou wait and see
Thou sailing floating in the air
Don’t try explaining lady I don’t care
Here's where the love stops
Here’s where we end
Why would I ever wish to be thine friend
(You’re not a lady, don’t act like a lady)

[The1exile]

Say, has anyone posted idiot song by Monty Python yet?

I have a mean medieval interpretation of it on here somewhere.

[DirtyDishSoap]

Say, has anyone posted idiot song by Monty Python yet?

I have a mean medieval interpretation of it on here somewhere.

nope, lets hear it exile

[luns101]

I started posting some stuff from Coolio and Nellie Furtado last night but then just got so tired. It might be awhile. Once again, the others had great songs!

[luns101]

Coolio - Unwonted Voyage


Come hither y'all for to take a ride
Declare not offal just get inside
Tis time to take thy hilt on another vein of trip
For thou canst have the hop if thou hast not the hip
Latch thy gat with the extra clip and,
Retard thy eyes and strike the switch
We trek to a place where all doth kick it
kick it, kick it, yea!... tis the ticket
Shalt be no bloodin', Shalt be no cripin'
Shalt be no joshin' ruffians set trippin'
For all hast a stack and shalt be no crack
Tis not a fine matter if thou art white or black, I
desireth to take thee there like the Staple Singers
plank an object in the tank for I know that I canst bring thee
If thou canst withstand the heat get thy hilt out the kitchen
For we be on a mission

Come hither and ride on an unwonted voyage
slide slide slippity-slide
with switches on the block in a '65
Come hither and ride on an unwonted voyage
slide slide who-ride
Tis no valley low enough for mountain high

I'm wont to find a place where I canst live my life and
perchance eat some mutton with my beans and rice, a
place where my seed canst make merry outside
forbear livin' in creeps of a drive-by
and whereas I steal away from them drive-by pluggers
I still maintaineth about those usurptuous robbers
My search continueth for I keep on looking
but ruffians are the same from Watts to Brooklyn
I'm wont to keep my troth in my people
but ever so my people strike as they evil
thou hast no understandin about runnin' with a gang
for thou dost not gang bang, and
thou hast not to stand on the branch and slang
for thou hast thy own thang
thou no canst help me if thou canst help thyself


Shove off to the left

Come hither and ride on an unwonted voyage
slide slide slippity-slide
with switches on the block in a '65
Come hither and ride on an unwonted voyage
slide slide who-ride
Tis no valley low enough for mountain high

Life tis a stink and forthwith thou die
still wont to get a ration of the apple pie
every romp tis not the same, for the romp still remains
doth it not appear strange, not a matter doth change
if thou dost not work then thou dost not eat
for only marvelous ruffians canst ride with me
hop-hop-hop thy five with haste down the block
remain plugger-free and keep the saps off thy jock
thou must have valor son, if thou desireth to go,
Fix thy gaze on this sweet chariot swing low
ain´t nobody cryin` ain´t nobody dyin
ain´t nobody worried, everybody ´s tryin
nothin' from nothin' leaves nothin'
if thou desireth something, thou must start frontin'
What wilst thou do when the 5 roll by
thou must be ready, so thou canst ride

[I GOT SERVED]

Nicely done luns!

[The1exile]

[The1exile]

Idiot Song by Monty Python

How sweet 'tis to be an Idiot,
As harmless as a cloud,
Too small to hide the sun,
Almost poking fun
At the warm yet insecure, untidy crowd.
How sweet to be an idiot,
And dip my mind in joy,
Children laughing at my back,
With no fear of attack,
As much retaliation as a toy.
How sweet 'tis to be an idiot. How sweet...

I tiptoe down the street,
Smile at everyone I meet,
But suddenly a scream
Dost smash in through my dream.
Fee fie foe and fum.
I smell the blood of an asylum.
(Blood of an asylum. But mother, I play so beautifully. Listen. Ha ha.)
Fie fie foe and fum.
I smell the blood of the asylum.
Hey you. You're such a peasant.
Thou hast as much brain as a dead ant,
As much imagination as a caravan sign,

But I still love thou. Still love thou.
Oooh, how sweet 'tis to be an idiot.
How sweet. How sweet. How sweet.

[CrazyAnglican]

"Baby Got Back" by The Knight Sir Mix-A-Lot

[Intro]
My God. Rebecca, gaze upon her butt.
It is ample. *scoff* She looks to be,
a minstrel’s wench.
Verily, who understandeth those minstrels? *scoff*
They speaketh only to her for she looketh,
like a wench of most ill repute.
I mean, her butt, is just so plump. *scoff*
I believeth not how round it is, like unto,
a …………., I meaneth – how vulgar to gaze upon
She is like unto a moor!

[Sir Mix-a-Lot]
Me likes big butts and I can not lie
Yeah thou other brothers can't deny
That when a wench strutteth in with an itty bitty waist
And an plump bottom in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your tough
'Cause ye knoweth that butt were stuffed
Deep in the dress she weareth
I'’m bewitched; I merely stareth