Conquer Club

Ever go to a friend's house and you gotta drop this massive log and pray the thing flushes without a clog?
Even worse, you hold that sucker in and try not appear rude that you need to leave and pray you make it home on time without adding a few lumps and stains to your underwear.

How about if you got this booger just blocking your nasal cavity, no tissue in sight, and you're stuck just sitting there waiting for an opportunity to blow that damn out?

Your nuts are on fire, you're in public and you really need to scratch that itch and hope that chick didn't have something weird and gave you a bad case of pickle dick?

Just thoughts. Maybe just be.

*this*

Could you imagine no TP after expelling that demon?! Nightmare fuel!

Really? None of you nerds have anything?!

Nothing.

No desire to talk about my fears and anxieties at the moment.

No desire to talk about your feces, ever.

Dukasaur wrote:Nothing.

No desire to talk about my fears and anxieties at the moment.

No desire to talk about your feces, ever.

You're lame. LAME

It can be an innocent! Like hating crowds or you're afraid the guy to your left at the bar is gonna talk about his ex wife for the millionth time.

I have for the last 30 years or so suffered from fairly severe omphalophobia. f*ck you (in advance) for judging me.

I'm also scared of heights, fortunately there isn't a ton of situations where both my greatest fears have needed to be dealt with at the same time.

Now I'm trying to arrange, I mean, imagine a scenario where they come together.
Are innies or outies worse?

I'm also horribly afraid of heights (or rather depths). Not just for me, but if I see someone else standing near a drop I want to drag them away.

jonesthecurl wrote:Not just for me, but if I see someone else standing near a drop I want to drag them away.

I'm right there with you.

(also, both are worse. They are all worst, not having one -just a smooth belly is equally disturbing)

Not a fan of heights either. Fractured my shoulder with a nasty fall. I remember you mentioning belly buttons though. Do you wear a shirt at all times? Does your wife/girlfriend or however you swing wear one at all times too? What about porkin time? Or showers?!

DirtyDishSoap wrote:Not a fan of heights either. Fractured my shoulder with a nasty fall. I remember you mentioning belly buttons though. Do you wear a shirt at all times? Does your wife/girlfriend or however you swing wear one at all times too? What about porkin time? Or showers?!

This isn't and AMA about my biggest fears (or maybe it is idk), but I will say if someone wants to kill my boner it probably requires them like touching their own or trying to touch mine... I've come to terms with the idea that BBs will always be in the room with me so their mere existence is something I've learned to tolerate as long as people aren't going out of their way to bring attention to the BBs in the room. Often times the way you would know you've triggered me is I will start burping, which will often kill the girls boner as well (vicious cycle of impotence).

More concerned that the lady has a boner to begin with but i guess that's just the product of the times we live in. :p

Bitey snake. I also developed some claustro after getting caught in a tube.

I don't mind some pretty gnarly heights as long as I'm on a solid structure or in an aircraft.

Once I was on a 120' man lift, not really for me. I can do it but I'm too old to volunteer for such a task. The guy I was up there with thought it was great fun.

KBs is just missing more digits. Can't blame him. I have to finger blast gals. Silly little knubs ain't cutting it.

Duk. Well, he's bald, so there's that.

Saxi. Trump passes away.

JP4 a student shows him how to source check material

Confed meets J4 and learns how to spell check and source check.

Karels is losing his dog. Despite being the biggest piece of shit on the planet, he still cares for something.

Pack Rat, Trump lives forever and evicts him.

Mrswdk takes one gander inside their jeans and realizes their a meme forever, or is Ralph but not so tough.

HitRed - 'God' tells him he was just kidding. Actually, he's Satan.

2dimes wrote:
I don't mind some pretty gnarly heights as long as I'm on a solid structure or in an aircraft.

Oddly, planes have never bothered me... I went up in a glider plane once and even that didn't trigger it. On the days I'm feeling my most brave I convince myself I could go skydiving, but the thought of bungee jumping immediately gives me vertigo if that makes any sense. My wife took me to a basketball game (Sac Kings) a few years back and bought tickets for the very last row in the highest section and last about 2.5 minutes... I couldn't do it... we watched the game standing in the main level where there was a bar.

jonesthecurl wrote:HitRed - 'God' tells him he was just kidding. Actually, he's Satan.

His husband starts mixing some Cobenfy into his food every night and suddenly a few days in god stops talking

Mook - your seats / bar story cracked me up! I can totally see that. I think the hardest thing I ever did was bungee jumping. Off a closed rusted ass decrepit bridge over a rocky gorge. My brother's plan.....he was always trying to kill me it was awful. I was....30? Sure AF couldn't do it now. I got my A cert for skydiving as a young man - did a couple jumps on mushrooms. Damn fun...lol. But off a bridge with a fucking rubber band? Nope.

mookiemcgee wrote:

2dimes wrote:
I don't mind some pretty gnarly heights as long as I'm on a solid structure or in an aircraft.

Oddly, planes have never bothered me... I went up in a glider plane once and even that didn't trigger it.

It's actually not odd. Quite a few pilots have a fear of heights. Flying inside an aircraft is somehow very different.

Pilot a large plane no problem, stand on the wing and they would be worried about falling off. Somewhat like looking out a window of a three or four story building.

Having a gal try and slip a finger up my poop chute is a new one.