Conquer Club

So I was out last night, with a mate, his bird and her mate, and obviously the norse is getting his groove on....

So all is going to plan, i seem to be heading straight on for a direct hit on my mate's bird's 18 year old mate (lets just call her "Miss x")....when we get back to my mates gaff, we have a few more drinks, and then it is bed time....Miss X goes upstairs to go to sleep, and obviously I follow her up there a few minutes later....I offer to give her one of my "special back-rubs", which like any hetero-sexual lady, she accepts....now my back-rubs, in the past, are sure bets...They have gotten most others to a point of sheer orgasmic pleasure and moistness....all seems to be going well....until, that is, the norse tries to take the bra off.....

For some bizarre reason, she does not seem to like this.....of course, being as persistent as any other tanked-up horny bloke, one attempts to again, and agin....by this point the norse was beginning to get a little frustrated and rejected...so I try to pull the "norses secret weapon"...by uttering the words "dont you trust me?"


Dammit, she said no....left the room, and went to go asleep in another bedroom....

But this wasn't the end...oh no no...cos the norse follows her into this room...and falls asleep beside her....to wake up at 11am the next morning on my own.....all alone.......rejected......

Of course, a few minutes later, I make my excuses and leave....I'm beginning to feel as though my super-sexual appeal is going through a bad time....

keep your head up champ, i am sure this will never happen again...

Had you ever met her before? If not, she might either be shy, or maybe have some dignity by not just fcking someone she barely knows, and who attempts to take her bra of when giving a back rub, or he was tired..

Btw, she rejected you and you followed her again into the room she was sleeping in, and then slept with her. Did you expect her to wait for you to wake up in the morning?

you were probably too old for her.

Don't listen to Tit, Norse... You go after 'em!

Remember... NO MEANS YES!

were you drunk?
proper or just a little tipsy?

get this in flame wars so we can give it the response it deserves

Norse: if I was her big brother.....you'd be her little sister by now....take a hint. And besides....you'll find that the swordsman who talks the least about his duels, usually gets invited to many more because of that.

DAZMCFC wrote:you were probably too old for her.

I didn't want to mention this, but yes... *grin*

glide wrote:Norse: if I was her big brother.....you'd be her little sister by now....take a hint. And besides....you'll find that the swordsman who talks the least about his duels, usually gets invited to many more because of that.

if he was a good swordsman, she would of let him roger her.

Yes, I didnt know her before...Yes, I did expect her to wait for me to wake up, so that I could attempt this again....Yes, I was absoloutley bladdered....No, I dont thnk Im too old for her....Yes, no means yes, at least i hope it does.......Glide, I thought I would share my rejection experiences, so that you can all agree with me that she was either really tired, on her period or a lesbo...

Norse, how do I break this to you...

You've lost your touch. I noticed it a little while back, but I didn't want to say anything. I'm sorry buddy...

....what? for good?

Damn....maybe I should start going after older people, these youngsters today are sooo demanding.

Norse wrote:....what? for good?

Damn....maybe I should start going after older people, these youngsters today are sooo demanding.

Yes they are! Dam those kids! Yesterday I went also out but we watched the game in the bar (Croatia-Israel). We were drinking and the police stopped the car (but I've talked my way out of this trouble). Seems to me that the policeman fell for my charm but the nice girl in the bar didn't. (BTW friend told me today that she had a big nose, but I don't remember).
Try going for those very rich and very old (like... 99!). After they die you can buy yourself all the woman you need...

P.S. Better luck next time!

it's okay norse. this story reminded me of one of joe beever's for some reason.

you had a touch?

Norse wrote:Yes, I didnt know her before...Yes, I did expect her to wait for me to wake up, so that I could attempt this again....Yes, I was absoloutley bladdered....No, I dont thnk Im too old for her....Yes, no means yes, at least i hope it does.......Glide, I thought I would share my rejection experiences, so that you can all agree with me that she was either really tired, on her period or a lesbo...

Well I think we all already assumed that... What woman doesn't like a pissed drunk love-machine chasing her from room to room?

I always find that the best routine to turn a rejection into a conquest is this:

You look the woman straight in the eyes and say,
"Bitch, you can make a choice. I can take this shit, or you can give it to me willingly."
then, hold her gaze until the silence becomes uncomfortable and say this,
"Now help me get out of this fucking latex before it chaffes"

Guaranteed 100% success rate. Try it out sometime.

Anarkistsdream wrote:Don't listen to Tit, Norse... You go after 'em!

Remember... NO MEANS YES!

I seriously hope this was an extremely poor and distasteful joke

Either way, you're still a f*ck for even saying it.

And Norse, go cry me a river. 'Wah wah my ultra creepy charms didn't work this time, probably because the girl may have had a brain' - all that you have missed out on is the mental scoreboard in your head ticking over to one more number. What a pity.

Also, i only just noticed you pulled out the lesbian card. OFCOURSE if a girl turns down your advancements (or any other guy for that matter it seems) she MUST be a lesbian right?

retards

radiojake wrote: OFCOURSE if a girl turns down your advancements (or any other guy for that matter it seems) she MUST be a lesbian right?

Absoloutley.

Thanks for the support jake.

have you ever thought that your an ugly wanker and that you pull off fat girls with hairy muff's!!

hulmey wrote:have you ever thought that your an ugly wanker and that you pull off fat girls with hairy muff's!!

Have to say, this never crossed my mind.

Norse wrote:Yes, I didnt know her before...Yes, I did expect her to wait for me to wake up, so that I could attempt this again....Yes, I was absoloutley bladdered....No, I dont thnk Im too old for her....Yes, no means yes, at least i hope it does.......Glide, I thought I would share my rejection experiences, so that you can all agree with me that she was either really tired, on her period or a lesbo...

No Norse if she was a lesbian she would have just died laughing at your
phallus .

Norse wrote:by this point the norse was beginning to get a little frustrated and rejected...so I try to pull the "norses secret weapon"...

I wondered where the story was gonna go at this point...