DaGip was at work building tractor cabs for the New Holland International Harvester line.
I was talking to a coworker about politics.
He was a big neonazi type with a big bushy black moustache and a shaved head.
I mentioned to him how I thought Ron Paul would have been the best choice for America, and Skinny's eyebrows popped up like a McDonald's sign contrasted against the stark white of his newly shaved skull.
"I thought that too. Paul would have got rid of the IRS and brought our troops home and protected us from the Mexican invasion!"
I just shook my head when I heard him say that.
"What do you think of Obama?" I asked him.
Skinny said,"OSAMA! I want to kill that SOB!"
"No, no, no..." I corrected him at the same time I tried to calm him down,"I said Obama with a B not an S."
"I would never vote for a fucking blackman",Skinny said but he used a racial slur instead.
Again, I shook my head and the work buzzer sounded. I jumped in my car and started for home, but I was hungry.
So I decided to stop at Jack In The Crack to buy a JumboJack.
But then, I realized that I did not bring my wallet or ID with me, but I forgot them on the kitchen table that morning!
So I started for home again.
It started raining, first little drops and then bigger and bigger drops came down. The streets were starting to flood and the ditches were full of drain off.
Then I saw something in the ditch trying not to drown. It was a cute little black and white puppy, fighting to keep his little nose above the water.
Quickly I pulled over and opened the window and grabbed the little guy out of the water using my fishing net.
I dried him off and he licked my hand and face. He was so happy to be alive! Then he curled up in the passenger seat and fell asleep.
Then I noticed that I was kind of lost. I didn't recognize the neighborhood I was in. There were black people all over the place.
Some black people had a sign and it said OBAMA '08.
I pulled over and talked to them.
"Say, i was thinking about voting for Obama, because Ron Paul will never become president."
"That's good, Obama is the best choice for this country right now. If you want you can go over to his house. He lives just down the block."
"Really!?" I said "I will do that, thank you."
So I drove down the block and there was a small brick house.
I parked my car and walked up to the door (I left the little puppy sleeping in the car).
I knocked on the door.
"Yes?" a pretty black woman answered the door, it was Michelle!
"Hello, can I speak with Barack?"
"Sure you can, come on in." Michelle invited me in.
There were kids of all races playing in the living room. Black kids with white kids, Red kids with Yellow kids...it was quite cool to see that. There were even some kids with mental disabilities playing as well. And the real funny thing was that I recognized the house now! It was my Great Grandmother's house. She was a Sioux Indian and lived on land set aside for government housing for tribal members.
Then I noticed that I was no longer Big Fat DaGip anymore, but I was Little Chubby DaGip. About the age of nine or ten I reckon.
I sat down and started playing video games, we were having so much fun!
Then Barack came in and said,"Hello, DaGip. You wanted to speak with me?"
I shook his hand and noticed that I was in my adult body again.
"Yes, Barack, but I kind of forgot what I was going to talk to you about. I was having so much fun playing with the children. Would you mind if I keep playing video games for a while?"
"Sure, go right ahead." I turned back into a little boy again and went back to playing video games with this little Down Syndrome girl.
Then all of a sudden the lights went out. Not just in our house but all over the place. Everything was enveloped in a loathing darkness.
I noticed that I had become an adult bodied DaGip again.
The little Down Syndrom girl was frightened and she clung to me.
"Don't be afraid, Kids. Michelle is getting some candles and will be back shortly, just sit down on the floor so you don't hurt yourselves." Barack assured us.
Everyone just felt so comfortable and warm around Barack.
Then we could hear machinegun fire outside, and rotor blades from a helicopter.
A helicopter came down into the front lawn and shined a spot light directly into the front window of Barack's house. I waved and smiled at the helicopter.
Then a man in a blue suit and blue helmet with a machinegun came running from the helicopter an kicked in the door. All the kids started crying and the little Down Syndrome girl clung tighter to my chest.
The policeman pointed the gun at me and said,"Mr. Henry Rollins?"
"No. You have the wrong guy, I am sorry." I replied.
"Why did you wave at me and look so suspicious then. Didn't you know that that gives me the right to illegally enter any household?" he snapped back at me. "Let me see your ID!"
Oh shit! I remembered that I forgot my ID at home. I was going to be arrested or killed for sure! I whispered my dilemma to Obama.
Obama spoke to the police man,"Sir, my friend DaGip has forgotten his ID at his house. Is there some other way he can prove that he is who he says he is?"
"Uh? I don't know." The policeman answered.
"Well, howabout if DaGip can show you a picture of himself off of the Internet? Then you will know that he is not lying." Obama was so smart!
"Okay." the policeman stated.
So I got on the internet, but I couldn't think of any place I had a photo of myself. And then it hit me! I had photos of myself on ConquerClub! So I showed the Policeman all my photos on ConquerClub.
Then the Policeman believed that I was who I said I was, and was beginning to leave.
Michelle came in with some candles and said,"Would you like to stay and eat something, Mr. policeman?"
The Policeman said,"No thank you. Me and some buddies outside are going to grab a little bite to eat, but thanks anyway."
The policman left and met his buddies around a campfire in the frontlawn.
They were cooking something on a stick, but I couldn't quite see what it was. So I got a little closer to see if I could see what they were cooking.
Oh My GOD! Those Policeman were roasting and eating that poor little Black and White puppy alive!
That was my dream--The End.