Conquer Club

Interesting and sadly rather true Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, I'm A Victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

King Doctor wrote:He sounds like a total square.

tzor wrote:Common Sense? Wasn't he Thomas Payne's son?

Fortunately we still have Poor Richard, even though he's retired from the almanac business.

tzor wrote:Common Sense? Wasn't he Thomas Payne's son?

Fortunately we still have Poor Richard, even though he's retired from the almanac business.

InkL0sed wrote:Thomas Paine wrote Common Sense with his semen?

Phatscotty wrote:Why do children choose these threads?

WE don't care if you are 9 years old! keep it to yourselves

And jesus Christ Doc, can you have your head any further up Inky's ass? Every thread, you are pumping his shit, just like a multi would.

Major Self Esteem issues.

Phatscotty wrote:Why do children choose these threads?

WE don't care if you are 9 years old! keep it to yourselves

And jesus Christ Doc, can you have your head any further up Inky's ass? Every thread, you are pumping his shit, just like a multi would.

Major Self Esteem issues.

Phatscotty wrote:Every thread, you are pumping his shit

Baron Von PWN wrote:It was once common sense that black people weren't people, I don't miss him much.

PLAYER57832 wrote:

Baron Von PWN wrote:It was once common sense that black people weren't people, I don't miss him much.

Good point!

Baron Von PWN wrote:It was once common sense that black people weren't people, I don't miss him much.

DirtyDishSoap wrote:

Interesting and sadly rather true Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, I'm A Victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

Poor guy. I'll miss him.

billy07 wrote:

PLAYER57832 wrote:

Baron Von PWN wrote:It was once common sense that black people weren't people, I don't miss him much.

Good point!

what an absolute pile of shit!

most of the people that post here have never known a society where common sense prevailed. they think we've always been told what was right and wrong, what's safe and what's not, what we can and can't do. therefore they are devoid of commonsense or any sense for that matter.

i recently had to do a job in the blistering heat wearing a long sleeve shirt (incase i got sunburnt), a hard hat (i was working in a carpark with nothing above me) gloves (my hands do not need gloves), protective glasses which kept steaming over preventing me from seeing properly. these rules are made by insurance company workers whom have probably never set foot on a building site. and there's your modern day common sense.

Stiv84 wrote:

DirtyDishSoap wrote:

Interesting and sadly rather true Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, I'm A Victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

Poor guy. I'll miss him.

I mostly agree with you. But you wear your pants way up to your chest, don't you? With sensible shoes.

DirtyDishSoap wrote:Why get a doctor to cut open your nuts when you can just cut the circulation off for years until they're nothin but raisins?