Conquer Club

Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science.

The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of morons promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

jonesthecurl wrote:Thank you.

British scientists have now also discovered the elemental particle which induces laughter.

It is called a Carion.

(Non-brits may not get that one)

jonesthecurl wrote:There are several tyes of carion:
The ones which shepherd the others together like the shepherd moons of Saturn's rings are called "Nurse Carions". Those which wander off on their own, lonesome and far from home are called "Cowboy Carions". Those which often pass from one state to another are called "Khyber Carions".
Others are being discovered all the time.
Have you heard of any, readers?

john9blue wrote:

jonesthecurl wrote:There are several tyes of carion:
The ones which shepherd the others together like the shepherd moons of Saturn's rings are called "Nurse Carions". Those which wander off on their own, lonesome and far from home are called "Cowboy Carions". Those which often pass from one state to another are called "Khyber Carions".
Others are being discovered all the time.
Have you heard of any, readers?

Carion Luggage

Carion My Wayward Son

Carion, Carion, As If Nothing Really Matters.