Welcome Comrades to the 50th edition of the Dispatch!
This will sadly be my last edition as an executive of the newsletter as I move on to other projects but fear not as I shall continue to contribute and assist with the newsletter as a reporter when I can. As part of the special 50th edition we have an interview with the creator of the newsletter and entertainment team leader samuelc812! Among other things in the clans section, Master Fenrir returns with his popular Hardballs, in the foundry we have a review of doodle earth by Oliver FA and Dukasaur interviews Dibbler in the tournament section. I hope you enjoy reading the newsletter as much as we enjoy creating it!
nagerous -
The Essence of Newsletter Awesomeness P.S. The Newsletter was in crisis this edition, upon attempting to put this together, I received the message "Your message contains too many smilies. The maximum number of smilies allowed is 40." Apologies to all those smileys that were brutally sacrificed from the edition in order for this to be published!
If you would like to apply to join the news team, please visit the thread below for more details!
Click here for Recruitment Details... In this edition of the mess hall, we have our regular scum insider feature on the latest in mafia games and also a write up on the community opinion on suggestions by rdsrds210. Enjoy!
nagerous Freestyle Executive [Community] Here's An Idea, by rdsrds2120 show
As ConquerClub continues to grow and mature, it does so with updates from our one and only Webmaster, lackattack. Implementing different types of updates is key to a site's healthy performance, but there's always a nice sense of community and involvement when a featured update had sprouted from a Suggestion by one of our very own denizens of CC. Whether it's Nuclear Spoils as suggested by cramill , which adds a new setting to gameplay, or the implementation of the Tournaments tab, or splitting up the Suggs and Bugs forum to make things more efficient for the site, community inspired updates help keep the site running smoothly.Adjacent Attacks Infected Neutrals XML Updates Account Sitting Feature Increase Player Limit to 12 Team Assassin and Terminator 1v1 Team Games More Feedback from Webmaster/Web Developer Mass Wall Clear Speed Game Round Lengths Foundry , these suggestions would give more room for mapmakers to paint in new concepts into gameplay and the maps themselves. The most recent XML Update, Losing Conditions, is inherent to the Middle Ages map just for an example of how XML Updates can help maps and gameplay become more dynamic. If you would like to express your thoughts or opinions on the Special Events that ConquerClub hosts for the Community, a thread has been started to take your thoughts! A write-up will be in the next newsletter!
The Scum Insider by safariguy5/nagerous/fircoal show
The Scum Insider Newbie Help Mafia Information , Mafia and You , and Rules and Terms of Mafia .What is "Mafia"? Mafia News Mafia Callouts Replacement Thread to see what games are in need of reserves/replacements.viewforum.php?f=213 Advanced Roles and Strategy by safariguy5 The Roleblocker and Jailkeeper What are they? Example How to Play these Roles Town or Mafia . Mafia roleblockers tend to be pretty straightforward to play, if there is a cop or doctor claimed, block them until they are killed. Town roleblockers generally should try to block a different person every night. If they can prevent a nightkill, then they know that their night target was the one responsible and is probably a mafia goon. Roleblockers are not particularly powerful town roles, so revealing yourself to kill a mafia member is a fair trade most of the time.Town . They tend to be a bit harder to play, mainly because of the difficult decision about whether to jailkeep a claimed cop or doctor. Jailkeeping a doctor tends to be a better idea as the cop usually hasn't claimed yet and the doctor is a high priority mafia target. Jailkeeping a claimed cop usually renders the cop a vanilla townie as he basically cannot gather any information. It's usually better to hope that there is another protective role to protect a claimed cop.
show: Interrogation of samuelc812
Q. Hey there samuelc812!Hey nagerous! Umm absolutely! Originally when i was a Global Moderator there was no Entertainment Team, while global moderating was ok I'd much rather be organising fun events, creating fun graphics and such. Optimus Prime had a callout for Events Coordinator and it jumped right out at me, it took me a few weeks to tell him of my interest but i eventually did and made the switch. Challenging but it has its rewarding points, putting a new event out there and seeing people playing on a new map or a new tournament and having fun between website updates is really rewarding and I enjoy it. Hmmm. Seeing the newsletter go from strength to strength has been good, and seeing events become more prominent have been the highlights for me. Most stressful would probably be leading up to and at the beginning of a special event, wondering if everything will work out properly, mistakes frustrate me sometimes but all we can do is improve haha. Meeting new people is a great benefit of being on TeamCC, there are a lot of friendly people. It's also been great to develop and practice organising and creating different things which is something i really enjoy. Well i find i spend a lot less time watching TV than i used to for some reason. I used to watch all those CSI shows but they really don't interest me anymore and i spend that time on CC. I probably spend too much time on here now but it's a good experience and why not spend your time on something you enjoy. That's an awesome idea! Kudos to whoever asked this question! The Pirates of the Carribean films are some of my favourites and he was my favourite character from them (pity he wasn't in the latest one) so that's why. If i told you I'd have to perform some unspeakable form of torture on you Glee! Love the music, in some cases i think it's a lot better than some of the other music that comes out. Also the Big Bang Theory, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and Frasier are also good Ummm what Australian TV shows? My name is sam, i wanted samuelc777 for my e-mail address but it was taken and it suggested a few other options. samuelc812 was one of them and for some reason i chose it as my username here when i registered. In hindsight i would have chosen something different like Aragorn or maybe Megatron would have been good Tough one, probably the world cup events or easter up to this point. Neither, coffee is too bitter for me and I've never had alcohol and probably never will (personal choice). Though i have tried this wonderful thing called vegemite I'm really keen to see how Research and Conquer plays, it's been in production for a long time and I'm quite keen to give it a go Someday I'd like to finish my Battle of Britain Map that i started a couple of years ago, but i don't have the time or motivation to do much on it right now. Watching movies. I really enjoy spending time with family and friends, playing games and just spending quality time with people it's great! Probably the nerd I would hire several web developers and get them working on things that the community wants. If the community is unhappy and leaves than you have no website, so i think listening to the community more would be something on the top of my list. I would also introduce a vegemite emoticon I would imagine one of the best movies of all time, and Orlando Bloom would be a cross between Balian of Ibelin and Legolas. Something like Balleg of Ibolas I'd love to coordinate with lack to have some sort of update piece with the webmaster. Every couple of issues he would update everyone on where he is at and what he's working on. Though that may give away the element of surprise that he tends to have with his updates Foundry and Tournaments for sure All of them! To be honest i would choose purple but a certain team already snagged it Faster updates would be the main thing and I'm sure most would agree. I worked on the Tournament Newsletter back in the day when Gozar was heading it up and i thought it would be great to have a newsletter that covered everything. There was one for tournaments, and one for the foundry. Why not combine them all into one so that there doesn't end up being several different newsletters all looking for reporters etc. Having it all under the one umbrella made a lot of sense to me. Growth, growth and more growth. I think it's progressed really well, i like how it has evolved and even though there is more to do in order to get it to the level I'd like it to be at, i know we'll reach the goal one day. Thanks nagerous!
Greetings and welcome to Issue 50! Our beloved leader
jricart needed a few days off to take care of some family business, so I've had the honour of taking a crack at editing this section. I hope you enjoy the results!
My
Meet the Tournament Winners interview this month is with
Dibbler , and I must say it is one of the most dramatic interviews I've had the pleasure to conduct. Dibbler is not only a great player, but a really neat person to talk to. I hope you enjoy learning about his accomplishments as much as I did.
As the TPA season winds down, events are unfolding fairly slowly, so we decided to not have a TPA update this time around.
Angola will be back with a TPA update for Issue 51, but meanwhile he has prepared an excellent feature article -- the second installment in his continuing coverage of
Rodion 's WCCL tournament.
Sonicsteve has prepared his
Join This? Or Not! overview of tournaments currently recruiting. It examines twice as many tournaments as usual -- a reflection of just how active the tournament world has been lately. Who said summers are slow on CC? Certainly not us!
Dukasaur ,
on behalf of: jricart Tournament Executive Meet the Tournament Winners! by Dukasaur show: Interview with Dibbler
Sometimes success, like good liquor and cheese, needs to be aged to get its full flavour. Today I present to you an interview with Dibbler , who waited two years for his first tournament win, and was then rewarded with not one but three wins within a 60 hour period. From the late morning of May 31st to the late evening of June 1st, Dibbler tasted triumph three times, and judging by his comments, it tasted very good!Map Map Master Triples Edition: Rail USA hosted by amazzony , which ran from January 15th to May 31st, and Map Master Triples Edition: Battle for Iraq! , also by amazzony , which ran from February 22nd to June 2nd. The third was a solo effort: Dueling Club by InsomniaRed , which ran from April 1st to June 2nd. Normally I start with the tournaments and my first question is always "What attracted you to this particular tournament?" but I think we're going to deviate from the norm here a little bit and start by talking about you. When did you first discover CC and how? How long was it before you got involved in Tournaments? And then suddenly, it all started to pay off.... alt1978 , was the one to sign me up for this tournament. I have played a bunch of times on Rail Europe and a few on rail USA but I didn't have any reps in trips and since the clan was a start up we needed to build teams and get reps on many different boards so I got recruited to this tournament. It was my first attempt at a triples tournament. Seems it was a good decision. A big thanks goes out to Dozer for signing me up, even if it was without my knowledge. I guess I need to clarify, because there are two possible translations of "reps" and I'm not sure which you mean. Are you talking "reputation" or "repetition"? I can see that. Pig Renters is a relatively new clan, and only began forming on January 9th. You guys signed up for the Rail tourney on January 16th, only a week later. So these events were all tied together: you were coming together as a group and working out all the snags and practicing in team tournaments at the same time. Sounds like you really enjoyed working it all out. That is a beautiful-looking map, but very difficult to figure out. The next one you went to was Battle for Iraq, which is pretty much the opposite -- graphically ugly, but fairly easy to play. Is that essentially correct? You had a different team in the Battle for Iraq tournament as well. All Pig Renters again, but on Rail USA your partners had been alt1978 and f.o.b. , whereas in the Battle for Iraq tournament you brought yourself, DogAlmighty , and Gunn217 . Were there any differences in the way the teams worked? I should hope nobody will be insulted; they are top-notch players all, but some teams are more naturally in tune, while others have to work at it. Still, both teams obviously got the job done, and beat some very tough opponents on some very tough maps, so all of them can be proud of themselves.amazzony does on tournaments, especially on rescuing tournaments that other people started and dropped. In fact, I believe the whole "Map Master Triples" series was something she rescued from another organiser. What did you think of the tournament itself, in operational terms like regular updates and clearly defined rules? Okay, so those two were both Triples tournaments, but the third one that you won was a solo effort. Dueling Club by InsomniaRed was a 1v1 bracket tournament. Tell me some of your memorable moments from that one. Mudpuppy after the first game. It was even more satisfying to have to wrest the trophy away. Lol, my next question was going to be, "Why did you choose Longbottom?" You're like the perfect interview subject -- you practically interview yourself. It's one hell of a story! I wish it would happen to me... Oh, one final question: So how much does it cost to rent a pig? Well Dibbler, it's been tons of fun talking to you! Thank you for your time, and good luck in all your future endeavours!
show: Get Your Own Interview
One concluding note: when I volunteered for this project, I offered to interview "all of the tournament winners." How naive I was! I had no idea what a staggering number of tournaments there really are. Now I know there is no way I will be able to get to everyone. I intend to publish one or two interviews in every edition of the Dispatch, but even so I will probably only get to talk to about 5 percent or so of all the winners. My approach will be partially random and partially targeted. Some will be chosen because of their fame or amazing stats, some will be chosen because I find the tournament they were in to be unusual or especially interesting, and many will be chosen completely at random. I will pay special attention to those that are winning a tournament for the very first time. If you are looking forward to telling the story of the exciting tournament that you were just in and want to be on my list, please feel free to PM me any time. Dukasaur .
Join This? Or Not! by sonicsteve show
This is our regular look at just a few of the tournaments currently in sign-ups:mcshanester29 is one of a number of tournament organisers who is diligently working his way through the list of CC maps, organising a tournament on each. His popular MC's List of Maps 1 vs 1 franchise has so far reached Brazil and British Isles . I'm no rambling gambler, but I wouldn't mind a bet that Cairns Coral Coast will be along sometime soon.Last Man Standing by anamainiacks is taking signups until 10th July. A series of terminator games will be held on Ireland, Madness, High Sea and Chinese Checkers until there is just one survivor.Journeys of Discovery - 6: David Livingstone could be for you. Fellow Devonian DaveH has created a triples tournament which embodies Livingstone's infamous hunt for the source of the Nile.Swiss Style Tournament by OliverFA . Oliver is looking for 256 entrants to play in a swiss bracket style.Pig Renters Middle Ages Grand Melee . Dibbler was looking for a further 23 competitors when I last checked. This event consists of terminator battles on the Middle Ages map - the players with the greatest number of terminations in each round will progress.Create/Join a Tournament or Tournaments Tab and take a look at the other tournaments that are waiting to be filled. Requests for Immediate Players section of the tournament forum.
WCCL Series Part II by Angola show: WCCL Series Part II
Five vignettes to get you through this edition of the WCCL tournament update.Vignette 1 ConquerClub , I like to actually play games, but for some reason, eight folks chose to be managers in this particular tournament.nerds (they like fantasy football and baseball ) and some joined because they are OCD (they like to manage things, apparently).mc052025 (THE Clueless), dman007 (Tonka's Truck Co), TheSaxlad (Saxy's United), Icepack (Blood Farmers), pearljamrox2 (Guerrilla Gorillas), alt1978 (Bacon-ators), gradybridges (Whedon's Warriors) and Fircoal (Johto Mafia).pearljamrox2 said, "but after a day or two I came back to it. ... I like doing drafts and auctions. I also am very aware of the CC community, and I have a pretty good idea of who is who. ... I play plenty of games normally, so this was a chance for me to have a little fun, without adding to my game load."alt1978 's (or Nuke Laloosh 's) take: It seemed like an opportunity to sit on the bench and take notes in a notebook as some of the best players on the site played some of the toughest boards in the game.Vignette 2 Dick Vitale , your favorite CC announcer here to tell you about the diaper dandies in this, the weakest of NBA drafts, err, CC drafts ever!Fircoal agreed, pulling a TrailBlazers.Icepack seemed to have a plan for everything.Big Three " approach. Had I known Dallas was going to win in 6, I may have come at the draft differently, but I'm stoked with the squad I was able to pick up.Miami Heat a dynasty, despite them not having won anything.Vignette 3 gradybridges said. "I only had 33 points. I figured people would use their money and be stuck with the privates ... turns out I was right."Vignette 4 Vignette 5 mc05025 .
Hello, folks! Fun fun fun for Issue 50! OliverFA brings you the next "Classic"; one whose asses are highly regarded in the speed world. In addition, I've interviewed
cairnswk about his map, Trafalgar.
Aside from that, the Foundry has been slightly more abuzz since last issue, so instead of a Foundry Talk topic, I've instead given you a link to the Foreman's recent discussion topic. Also, make sure to check out the
Foundry Assistants Announcement , the
Foundry Announcement Index , and, of course,
Map Surveyors .
Victor SullivanFoundry Executive Drafts / Design Briefs [Discussion] by MrBenn Classic Review – Doodle Earth by Oliver F.A. show
Nowadays, the Foundry is plenty of life. We enjoy a continuous stream of creativity and talent. Thanks to the effort of dedicated mapmakers, new additions are quenched regularly. And many more maps are in the works.Classics Doodle Earth by Evil DIMwit Doodle Earth Doodle Earth simplicity With only 18 regions, that’s a small world! It is like getting the Classic map and applying a smaller level of detail. being so small, it is very susceptible to luck strikes If you want a simple map for a change, but with all the key elements, Doodle Earth is your map! viewtopic.php?t=15897
Map Spotlight: Trafalgar by Victor Sullivan show
For big issue 50, I got the pleasure of interviewing the esteemed mapmaker, cairnswk , about his recent return to the Foundry and his revived 29th map, the Battle of Trafalgar :Click image to enlarge. Sully :cairnswk :Sully :cairnswk :Nelson's column in Trafalgar Square in London both commemorate this Battle. Battle of Trafalgar .Sully :cairnswk :a fine addition to CC's stable of maps a unique naval battle for all naval fans/players as with every other map, another opportunity for conquest, team games, and medals the gameplay is not totally remarkable as there are only assaults and bombardments possible, but perhaps it will be epic - only beta will test that and not an anchor in sight Sully :cairnswk :Sully :cairnswk :Sully :cairnswk :Sully :cairnswk :The Spanish Armada " has been good. I don't' know if i want to re-visit any other of my projects in the "dead bin" - they're probably best left alone to die.Sully :cairnswk :
Welcome to some more Clan action as we have the requisite round-up of events in our respective Cup briefings, Bogan rants at the injustices of the kangaroo courts as a duet to his new home, Blackknight looks at policing within clans and Master Fenrir tackles an exciting way to reach the top of the totem pole in CC.
Also, keep an eye out everyone as we reach the
Clan League 3 Finale where we have an exciting battle on our hands between 2 clans who should know each other pretty well by know after battling often over the last year, in both league and cup competitions. Agents of Chaos have jumped to favorites in popular opinion after being ranked Third in Div C at the beginning of their Campaign and while this came courtesy of comprehensive wins over Empire and Kort, Immortal Assassins have been similarly impressive in topping their group ahead of the selfsame AoC before thence overcoming Mythology and progressing to the final after overcoming The Spanking Monkey's in a tough encounter.
In the mix as well is some
Spring-cleaning in the Clan forums as we now have an exclusive sub-forum for
Challenge Requests to streamline the clan scene in a similar fashion to the Tournament forums.
Leehar Clan Executive Conqueror's Cup 2 - Quarterfinal by Leehar (Nemesis) show
Welcome to the third round of an enticing CC2 we've had so farThe Horseman of the Apocalypse vs. Agents of Chaos Clan League 3 Finals . That double-duty may actually endanger the Agents as they'll be wary of fighting on two fronts and worried of losing in both as they must still be considered underdogs after playing in Div 2B in Clan League 2 and falling at the first hurdle in the inaugural edition of the Conqueror's Cup . However, Thota must be similarly cautious as they faltered somewhat at the same stage in last years competition when they were pushed all the way by a spirited Nemesis outfit to win the tie-breaker after a dead-heat at 20-20. Early score in this duel however? 2-1 to ThotaLegends of War vs. The Spanking Monkeys Quarterfinals , before losing to Immortal Assassins in the semi's in another tense scoreline of 10-9. LoW's results have taken a different albeit still similar turn with defeats only to the self-same Thota (twice) and a blimp on their radar against Outlaws & Highwaymen, before overturning that result only 3 months later in the first round of CC1. Now they meet again, and while LoW did well last year at the same stage in the competition as 4th seeds when overcoming the then #5 in the form of Immortal Assassins, they now are in that same position against an unforgiving now #4 in Tsm, who've started well to take an early 4-3 lead.Knights of the Round Table vs. Fraternal Order of Exceptional Drinkers Clan League Semi's against AoC. We look forward to an exciting semi-final then as the newest entrants into the top 8 take on the clan still hungry to retain their title. And again Kort is favoured with a 4-3 leadEmpire vs. The Odd Fellows Union
Newcomers Cup Finals Jigger1986 (GR) show
With the finals of the Newcomers Cup in full swing, 3 clans all fight for the title. As mentioned earlier those three clans are Grim Reapers, One Step Ahead and The Pack. Locked in two simultaneous wars of 43 game each this grueling final has caught the attention of the clan world and things just keep heating up. All three clans were confident in victory as there has been ample trash talk from all sides and as the current score will tell, its been an exciting game.Reapers(16) ----The Pack(24) -War Thread vs Reapers(20) ----One Step Ahead(16) -War Thread vs The Pack(23) --One Step Ahead(13) -War Thread vs Great_Ollie on a very impressive tournament. They have dominated the competition from round 1 to the finals and are we deserving of the title of Newcomers Cup Champions.Benga for hosting this great tournament. It was very well organized and I'm sure it will become a staple in CC's multi-clan challenges.
Justice - The rum rant The Bogan Deity (BoFM) show
Devoted readers, stalkers, mullet fanciers, jealous haters, and other assorted CC pederast (or as freakns would say it pet a wrist). I'm going to start this months sermon with a little story that may or may not have happened.
Spice up your clan - Clan Tribunals by BlackKnight_6 (TNC) show
This was meant to be a great piece of investigative journalism. For the first time in my short dispatch writing career I decided to do some research and get material from other clans before I went to print. Here was my initial question:Rodion wrote: I've never seen a problem inside my clan grow to the point it needed some sort of tribunal. I don't know of any rigid behavioral rules we have other than disliking when clan members publicly state they don't like something about our clan (that should be worked privately).
Master Fenrir wrote: There is no tribunal or clan code. For the most part, whenever a decision of this sort needs to be made,
danryan , my FOED co-leader, and I discuss it via PM conversation and then implement whatever our final decision is. If a player has an issue with another player, either danryan or myself or both will receive a PM, and we will attempt to work it out together via PM conversations, as we'd prefer not to muddle the light-hearted vibe within our clan forum.
eddie2 wrote: mine is simple we have a easy going clan the only thing ik kick players out for is if they are missing turns with no explanation they get 2 warnings then booted.
Master Fenrir wrote: The largest "problem" that I've had to deal with is with the way that I organize our wars. A few wars back, a few clan-mates raised an issue with playing a war exclusively with assigned games. I started a thread in our forums to discuss the issue. Most were happy with the assigned games, but there were several who still wanted a looser way to handle things because they didn't like getting "stuck" playing only certain games. I completely understood where they were coming from.
HARDBALLS with Master Fenrir(FOED) show
There are many ways to achieve notoriety on Conquer Club. When you think of score, you usually first think of King_Herpes who holds CC's highest score ever, a confirmed 6,351 and an unconfirmed 6,373. When you think of medals, you think of tournament beasts such as HighlanderAttack (111, but with 209 tournament wins), danryan (125, but with 52 tournament wins), and Blitzaholic (114, but with 79 tournament wins). However, there are other less measurable ways to become CC-famous. DarthBlood and ZONDA . At the time, I was hovering around the captain rank and they were both majors. I was stunned that two higher ranked players would trust me with their turns. With only a few hundred games under my belt, I like to think that they looked deep into my soul and saw the potential for me to become one of the best account sitters this site has ever seen.L M S went on vacation and asked me to sit his account. At this time, I was in the Immortal Assassins and he was in a now dissolved Outlaws & Highwaymen, and they were in a clan war against the Legion . This was prior to clan wars receiving tournament privileges and games with the pretty blue game labels, so they were simply set up as private games. Making an honest mistake, I sat for LMS in those games. The response was quick.Subject: ++The Legion++ vs O&H (32-28) of 60pts (Complete) Snowgun wrote: Oh, and if you guys could cover your turns with people from your clan that would be nice. Didn't think getting double teamed by you and IA was in the contract.
Hopscotcher wrote: well hello mr. fancy pants!
L M S and Fenrir are buds, so complain to a deity who cares!
Culs De Sac wrote: we just bitter.. he covered 2 turns..and his dice were insanely hot....
Snowgun wrote: Well we understand that but if you guys could refrain from it in THESE GAMES from now on that would be great.
Unless you guys
need to pull in brigs from other clans to handle us?
Mythology for L M S.Subject: Myth vs FOED 29-31 {FINAL} L M S wrote: We are looking forward to this one, should be tons of fun and very close...except we have a secret weapon.
MTIceman41 wrote: Master Fenrir covering your games then must be the weapon
MTIceman41 , an opponent who has always played solid games against me, I was flattered. I was slowly managing to spread the knowledge of my sitting skills one clan at a time. A few more wars and I might be recognized as one of the top sitters ever to grace CC with moves from more than one account. the Fraternal Order of Exceptional Drinkers . The clan world has also seen a rising star in josko.ri of the Knights of the Round Table clan. Rumors of Josko's account sitting abilities quickly spread during the Tofu vs Kort war . His sitting won him further acclaim when Kort beat a previously undefeated THOTA to win the Conqueror's Cup . This continued through the Kort vs G1 war leading to a Cheating & Abuse report lodged against Josko and others for questionable sitting tactics."What kind of prima dona, Real-Housewives-of-Orange-County reason is that?" It was then, though, that I remembered that Rodion is an attorney. Having experience in the law field, I could understand how such a career could be pretty stressful and mentally taxing, so I gave Rodion the benefit of the doubt there. AndyDufresne . A great source of contention within the C&A thread was which circumstances warranted account sitting and which did not. So I gave Andy several scenarios and asked him to respond.Master Fenrir, AndyDufresne wrote: Scenario : I have a hot date with a girl who is a clear 10. I've left 30 minutes to take my turns before I get ready, but then I notice that I'm out of hair wax and I need to use that 30 minutes to go to the store and get some new hair wax so that I can look fresh for my date. Can I have somebody sit for me?It sounds like a first date. Though first dates are important for making good impressions, I think in this scenario you would really be neglecting your CC relationships by even going out and not taking your turns yourself. You can't be an absentee lover in your games---they'll know it isn't you, and they'll feel like you are abandoning them for some 'new hot babe' who just burst onto the scene as a new plaything. Take my, and Stephen Stills', advice: Love the One(s) You're With Scenario : Let's say the hot date is with twins. One is a 10, the other wasn't the favorite, so she has attention seeking issues, which makes her kind of annoying, so her personality brings her down to a 9. So I have a date with a 9 and a 10. Can I have a sitter then?By looking for a date with multiple partners, it is pretty clear that you aren't looking for a long term relationship, but something of an enjoyable quickie. While certainly something to strive for, you'll probably end up with neither of them at the end of the night, leaving you with nothing but empty pockets. If you really are that into multiple partners and quickie, really, Speed Games are the way to go. Imagine Speed Ass. Doodling all night? One after another, all to your heart's content. Scenario : Suppose that on said date, I spend a good 4 hours of the night fist pumping. When I wake up the next morning, my right arm is so sore that it’s practically useless. I could attempt to take turns with my uncoordinated left hand and arm, but this would likely result in several mis-clicks that could cost my team a game. Can I have a sitter then?First off, fist pumping is a dangerous hobby---it'll probably lead to FPS, or Fist Pumping Syndrome. I highly encourage you to leave the fist pumping for the professionals who are trained Scenario : I'm walking past a construction site on my way home and a crane topples and crushes my legs. I'm still conscious, so I call 911 and the operator says that they're busy and won't be able to send me any help for 45 minutes. I could take turns from my phone, but I fear that something like losing 14 vs. 4 might push me over the edge. Can I get a sitter?While crane toppling is startling more common than one may immediately think Scenario : Few people know this, but I spend my nocturnal hours fighting crime. Suppose that one night, I have to spend more time than estimated to run down a particularly speedy burglar who has fled into the night. Can I use my Fen-Fone (patent pending) to text somebody to sit for me?First, as straight and goodhearted as you and your actions may be, vigilantes are not the appropriate response to crime. Though police departments, the justice system, and other related organizations may be slow to response, in a civil society like the one we all live in, vigilantes have no place. Vigilantes in fact usually endanger the more lives than they save. So the correct answer to this scenario is hang-up Kickass costume Scenario : A brutal plague hits the Earth. All women except for one are sadly dead. All men except for me are left sterile. It would be a good idea for me to immediately start insuring that our population survives before the sole female survivor is captured and forced into some weird role as Goddess of Fertility in this new civilization. Can I get a sitter then?It sounds pretty dire, and probably is. But in this dark-wasteland of a world we would live in, CC would shine as a beacon of our old world, a reminder of how things were. While I agree that the continuance of the human race is key, every effort must similarly be taken to keep those beacons of our old world active and shining. If you have any humanity left in your body after this plague, perhaps rather than allowing the sole female survivor to be captured by others, or forcing her to be your own personal sex slave in the guise of human race continuance, you should really sit down and have a talk with her. What if she isn't down for being the next Eve? It has to be her choice, and by the sound of this scenario, it sounds like TMT, typical male takeover. So let her refuse, as she probably will. What will you be left with then? Oh look, there is a bright shining beacon of our old world welcoming you into its arms, and it will nurture you as civilization comes to an end, and as the Earth reclaims its independence from. Enter that shining beacon. Enter CC. --Andy
Stay Tuned for the next issue of the ConquerClub Dispatch for an interrogation of
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I'd switch the pink and purple 
It's a win win for Sam and I 
