Ask Wolffystyle

[Wolffystyle]

Wow.. wolffy is quite the intellect we really didnt think existed... Impressive answers so far,

I got a question...
When experimenting with a little project called (What I like to call fun) Nuclear Fission, Is it true-ly necessary to shield the radiating electrons from Humans (or another species) or would it actually be better to expose Humans to this radiation in hopes for tolerance and immunity (eg. vaccinations, in small doses) toward future experimentation and possibly eliminating the threat of nuclear war?

Follow-up:
Also (in your vast experience as a Theorist) Have you personally found a way to eliminate the "GLOW" left behind when actually exposing yourself to said radiation?... I've heard rumor of an amazing break through in modern technology that promotes the "glowing effect" as a way of removing wrinkles on the human epidermis

Beersurfer, sorry it took so long to respond. I had to engage in thorough research to find the answer to your question. I spent two weeks in the library stacks and another week on a field study with Congolese Gorillas and finally one more day on the toilet. But at the end of my sabbatical, I believe I have found the correct answer. The answer, as you're probably aware, will surprise you!

You asked whether or not humans should expose themselves to radiation to build up tolerance and immunity. My response, however, only tangentially answers your question. The truth is that humans MUST expose themselves to radiating electrons, but not for the aforementioned reasons. Human beings are quite boring. We have managed to utilize technology to become lazy and no different than other single-celled organisms. We have successfully prevented natural selection from taking place by sticking our dirty five-fingered hands into God's business. Modern medicine, health standards and technological assistance prevents the weak from dying off. We need to give nature back the opportunity to force us to evolve.

That being said. We must expose all the wrinkly, weak and wretched humans (I believe those three adjectives encompass all of us) to massive amounts of radiation so that we may evolve. Some of us may grow a third hand or eyeball. Some of us may turn green. Some of us may spew blood. In the end, however, those humans who have 'evolved' the best will develop immunity and will continue to survive and reproduce. The residual glow will probably serve as camouflage against the savage and vicious large animals that were also exposed to the radiation.

So, not only will humans become a stronger species, but nature will continue to work and it will stop its own act of killing us through global warming, earthquakes and monsoons. Humans (if you can call the new species of highly evolved, glowing, six-fingered, gilled, and scaled people that) will become a much stronger and advanced species without need for shampoo. They will probably eat nuclear warheads for snacks. Their only threat will be the Great Alaskan Purple Moose with nine antlers and a libido the size of Beckytheblondie's chesticles.

Wolffystyle~

[Wolffystyle]

Hi Wolffy,

It's Owen again. 'Innie' or 'outtie'. Further to that, how the hell did it ever become such? I mean did one poke their belly button so much or pull. Hmmm...perhaps a theory as to how the penis/vagina was created - one may have either pushed or pulled too much.

Wow, owenator, you're quite a theorist! Great question, too!

The first answer is: Outtie.

The Second answer is: It became such as a direct result of radiating electrons.

The Third answer is: I don't have a belly button. I consider it to be a weakness. Do you think Superman had a belly button? Hells no: http://repairstemcell.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/superman_pic1.jpeg. My mother fed me a cocktail of cauliflower and paint chips throughout her entire pregnancy.

Wolffystyle~

Postscript: I love how Superman is standing in front of an American Flag. He actually never officially passed his citizenship test.

[JOHNNYROCKET24]

why do you have me on ignore when I dont think we even played a game together ?

[owenator]

Wolffy,

You're trapped on a deserted island. However, on this island with you, are:

a) A beautiful, sexy woman who could quite possibly have been a pornstar. Her only faults? She talks, even during sex. For example; she may throw out a random sentence such as, "why is the sky blue?" whilst doing the 'deed'. Wait, there's more! She has more hair than you do - like a wolf. This hair by the way, cannot be cut/shaved by anything.
b) A very large woman, who quite honestly is the most hideous thing that you have ever seen. Get's along well - with anyone. But, she's intelligent. She also emits a smell more repulsive than vomit and sewage combined.
c) A woman who's in her late 50's but without any flaws...she's beautiful, witty, smart, and probably in better shape than girls half her age.

You come across a lamp and rub it, just to quench your curiosity to see if a genie would appear. And lo and behold! One does appear. The genie, is sick and tired of granting thousands of wishes and tells you, that you can get only 1 wish however it is filled with more conditional terms than a cellular phone contract. He advises that this wish is to allow you to leave the island to your destination of choosing. All of mankind has been wiped out. You can leave the island with only ONE of the three that are trapped with you. What do you do?

Owen

[BoganGod]

Oh great sage wolffy, you haven't checked this thread forever

I'm asking a question in the hope that you will find the time to answer this worthy question, from such a humble supplicant.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

It is a question which has puzzled people since the dawn of time, and you would be adding greatly to mans knowledge bank if you could answer this, the most difficult of questions.

[JOHNNYROCKET24]

why do you keep telling me your taking me off ignore but never do ?

[BoganGod]

why do you keep telling me your taking me off ignore but never do ?

Maybe he likes keeping you guessing?

[targetman377]

how has this not been moved yet

[Falkomagno]

Hi wolfy. I want to ask you, which one do you prefer...little but playful, or big but sleepy?

[e_i_pi]

Dear Wolffystyle,

When was the last time you deceived a small child with sweets, and was the experience worth the justice that now gets pounded into you by your cellmate on a daily, sometimes twice daily, basis?

Good question e_i_pi, thanks for asking it. However, it's abhorrent of you to suggest that what my cellmate does is "justice". Why should a good man, friend of the moose, eater of the mango, get punished for giving a small child sweets? Do not, I ask with steadfast resolve, small children enjoy sweets?

Sure, I told the child that I was giving him cherry-flavored sweets while I actually handed him watermelon-flavored sweets, but is this a crime punishable by 'pounding'? May the Lord be our Judge. May children enjoy their sweet sweets. May the jurors choke on watermelons.

Here's a question of mine own... why is every inquiry I receive adorned with some sort of sexual overtone?

Good question Wolffystyle, the answer may surprise you! Back in the summer of '08 the mighty and glorious leader of the site that we all call Conquerer was someone so insignificant that I cannot remember their name. Their reign was grey, drab, and uninteresting, and this quality of leadership spread across the forums like a thick blanket of smog, stifling all creativity, humour, and elan.

Then, due to the newly implemented rules against farming, a true leader rose to the top, our glorious current leader, King_Herpes. His gameplay is mysterious and complex - on the surface it looks like farming, but there is something about it that makes it not farming. In any case, now that he has taken the throne, King_Herpes has become more active in the forums, addressing his subjects on a daily, sometimes twice-daily basis. His oral technique is unmatched.

This newfound life has propogated many spin-off parvenus in the forums, people who enjoy Carry On films, Benny Hill re-runs, and play-on-word film titles, such as Big Trouble in Little Vagina, Ferris Bueller Jerks Off, Doing John Malkovich, and Seven Years in Thai Butt. This has led to an overall increase in the humourous experiences of forum-goers, the number of bannings, and has also strangely resulted in threads such as this laying dead in the water for many a month. As you may or may not know, many brownnosers have taken up the arms against this kind of posting behaviour, finding it offensive to their narrow minded Christian sensibilities. But alas their attempts are futile... as the ancient adage goes: "The penis mightier than the sword"

[72o]

Back in the summer of '08 the mighty and glorious leader of the site that we all call Conquerer was someone so insignificant that I cannot remember their name. Their reign was grey, drab, and uninteresting, and this quality of leadership spread across the forums like a thick blanket of smog, stifling all creativity, humour, and elan.

Then, due to the newly implemented rules against farming, a true leader rose to the top, our glorious current leader, King_Herpes. His gameplay is mysterious and complex - on the surface it looks like farming, but there is something about it that makes it not farming. In any case, now that he has taken the throne, King_Herpes has become more active in the forums, addressing his subjects on a daily, sometimes twice-daily basis. His oral technique is unmatched.

This newfound life has propogated many spin-off parvenus in the forums, people who enjoy Carry On films, Benny Hill re-runs, and play-on-word film titles, such as Big Trouble in Little Vagina, Ferris Bueller Jerks Off, Doing John Malkovich, and Seven Years in Thai Butt. This has led to an overall increase in the humourous experiences of forum-goers, the number of bannings, and has also strangely resulted in threads such as this laying dead in the water for many a month. As you may or may not know, many brownnosers have taken up the arms against this kind of posting behaviour, finding it offensive to their narrow minded Christian sensibilities. But alas their attempts are futile... as the ancient adage goes: "The penis mightier than the sword"

This is the funniest thing i've read in a long time.

[e_i_pi]

This is the funniest thing i've read in a long time.

As Wolffystyle established earlier, this is not the way you should be posing your questions. You should have worded it such:

This is the funniest thing i've read in a long time? ?

Thank you for your question 72o, a very good question indeed! Perhaps it is the funniest thing you have read in a long time, perhaps not. Only you can answer that question. But I can see in that first quote that you have answered that question! Yet you now pose the question... and around and around it goes, like the plump red tongue of a buxom lady slowly enjoying a strawberry lollipop.

This is a form of conundrum that has baffled human beings for many centuries since Alexander the Great, upon visiting Egypt, asked "How the f*ck did they build that?!" There is no simple answer, but I will refer you to this interpretation of the problem by the famous M.C.Escher:



Upon study of this image, you may see the answer before you... maybe a good start would be if you stopped holding your pencil

[Beckytheblondie]

WOLFFY COME BACK
E_I_PI COME BACK

[ManBungalow]

[cue 'Titanic' theme]

[Army of GOD]

What is love?

[Chuuuuck]

WOLFFY COME BACK
E_I_PI COME BACK

I do miss Wolffy, almost as much as I miss 'ol Becky

[#1_stunna]

Who gave you premium again?

that is a very nice gesture.

[Wolffystyle]

Who gave you premium again?

that is a very nice gesture.

That is a very good question, #1_Stunna, thanks for asking it.

To this moment I do not know who awarded me Premium and the mystery will remain further shrouded by the message I received with the gift:

"Walk two steps towards the closest pier. Now walk one step backwards away from that pier. Now walk exactly the number of steps forward towards the end of the pier that would be equal to the number of steps require to make you take one step off the end of that pier. Bring a floaty. You may use either a cauliflower or an empty bottle of VO5 shampoo in place of the floaty. But do not, I MEAN IT, do not try to find me. I will not be wearing a bright red cowboy hat or leopard print jock strap."

So I followed every instruction carefully and as I took my final step off the pier, clutching onto a:

show

I did see a man in a bright red cowboy hat and leopard print jock strap. But I know the note said that the anonymous donor would NOT be wearing said outfit, so the only thing I know is that that man was NOT my donor but merely a passerby.

Luckily, as I stepped off of the pier I was saved by a deus-ex-machina in #1_Stunna's and Beckytheblondie's pet seal Günther who just so happened to be swimming under the pier at that instant. We rode together to the shoreline safely and had a couple of minnows for lunch.

As for your second inquiry, Stunna, it has not been input in the correct format and I can only assume that you meant to ask; "That is a very nice gesture?"

To that, I respond that I am not sure yet. The gift certificate has been sent to the lab to undergo analysis as to whether or not it was laced with any sort of contaminant. We must await the lab results before we make any conclusions. There could very well be an assassin out after me not wearing a red cowboy hat or leopard-print jock strap. All I can answer conclusively at the moment is that the minnows I shared with Günther at lunch were delicious.

[Army of GOD]

What does having sex wolffstyle look and feel like?

[Wolffystyle]

What does having sex wolffstyle look and feel like?

That's a very good question Army of GOD, thanks for asking it! This, however, imposes a very great challenge to try to explain through words. I would love to show you -> through interpretive dance HERE.

Additionally, wearing a bright red cowboy hat also helps facilitate the move. Most of the time though, all that is really required is a single person, a mango under the bed, a back room at a Uruguayan Super Market and usually, a full moon. Though, the full moon can be replaced with stage lighting -> it really just helps set the mood.

As for what it feels like-> If I could only use one word to describe how Wolffystyle feels I would use: "Rapturous". If I could use two words to describe how Wolffystyle feels I would use: "Feels rapturous". If I could use three words to describe how Wolffystyle feels I would add a grammatical modifier and say: "Feels very rapturous". If I could use four words to describe how Wolffystyle feels I would use: "Friday - By Rebecca Black".

[Victor Sullivan]

Why have you been on such a long hiatus? Why have you not continued to grace fair CC with your abundant knowledge?

-Sully

[Lubawski]

Why have you been on such a long hiatus? Why have you not continued to grace fair CC with your abundant knowledge?

-Sully

Great question Victor Sullivan. I'm glad you asked. As some people are aware, Wolffy has been busily trying to make a way for himself in the world. All he had told us at EMPIRE before his hibernation was that he was leaving to be trained in some kind of secret art. Just last month Wolffy graced his old friends with a surprise meal, but, truth be told, it tasted a bit like some sort of meat substitute. We gathered that he has been off at some fancy school becoming a chef. Knowing that although we enjoyed having him throw us a feast, we were disappointed in the size and quality presented, Wolffy left determined to do better next time. He has been busily mastering his craft and promises us that next months meal will be done "Wolffy-hana style." I have my suspicion that his intention is to carve up some cattle and cook it in front of his EMPIRE mates like they do at Benihana, the only reference I was able to come up with after an extensive google search. We're all waiting on the edge of our seats, fork and knives in hand.

[BYUwonder11]

Why have you been on such a long hiatus? Why have you not continued to grace fair CC with your abundant knowledge?

-Sully

Great question Victor Sullivan. I'm glad you asked. As some people are aware, Wolffy has been busily trying to make a way for himself in the world. All he had told us at EMPIRE before his hibernation was that he was leaving to be trained in some kind of secret art. Just last month Wolffy graced his old friends with a surprise meal, but, truth be told, it tasted a bit like some sort of meat substitute. We gathered that he has been off at some fancy school becoming a chef. Knowing that although we enjoyed having him throw us a feast, we were disappointed in the size and quality presented, Wolffy left determined to do better next time. He has been busily mastering his craft and promises us that next months meal will be done "Wolffy-hana style." I have my suspicion that his intention is to carve up some cattle and cook it in front of his EMPIRE mates like they do at Benihana, the only reference I was able to come up with after an extensive google search. We're all waiting on the edge of our seats, fork and knives in hand.

Well I'm know I'm ready for this "Wolffy-hana" meal that you speak of, most importantly I'm just glad that being a part of EMPIRE I get first dibs, and I can only assume that KORT will be the main course, although I don't want those sissy gourmet portions they teach you to make at culinary school, going to need the real deal. Welcome back Wolffy.

[jammyjames]

Why have i yet to see your presence in 5 man feudal war games?

[Wolffystyle]

Why have i yet to see your presence in 5 man feudal war games?

This is a very good question, JammyJames, thanks for asking it. The answer may surprise you!

To answer that question, I capture your attention and bring it focus upon the feudal lands of yore. In the time and general area upon which you are now focused lived very timid young boy named JameyJamms who spent countless hours overturning such universal questions as “why are armies of bright colors ravaging my peaceful neutral villages?” and “why is my ancestral region under perpetual bombardment by the Kingdom of escalating growth?” and “how do crickets chirp?”

JameyJamms, constantly lost in thought would often seek to create his own answers to the questions that arose. Due in part to his creative imagination but the largest part was due to the facts that all the libraries, cloisters and scriptoria we devastated in the total Feudal War. JameyJamms , constantly involved within his superego, created a second and parallel identity for himself, which often became his reality. His alternate self, JammyJames, created a peaceful feudal land which saw no war, conquest or destruction. In this alternate identity, JammyJames created a Demigod with all the answers who he named Wolffystyle.

Melding this figment of his imagination with his reality, JammyJames transgressed the line of supra-reality and enabled his feudal demigod to catalyze the very greatest level of introspection by challenging the idea of his very existence from the supra-egoic state by asking him to answer his own question without aid of omniscient being or cricket.

So JameyJamms what is the answer?