I'm of course talking about dice complainers.
For as long as they have existed, science has strived to understand these people. Where do they come from? How does one become a dice complainer? What makes them different from us? Is it genetic, or is it something one chooses to become?
Should dice complainers have the same rights as the rest of us? Should they be allowed to marry non-complainers?
We don't have all the answers yet, but we have made progress. With scientific methods, we have now divided dice complainers to five subgroups:
- The Conspiracy Theorist: is convinced that his dice rolls are being "rigged" and "manipulated" by the site, because the site admin dislikes him personally or something. Usually wears a tin foil hat. Is easy to identify, because almost every post he makes in the forums advertises his bad dice luck in some way or other.
- The Equalizer: gets stuck up on the "fairness" of dice. Perceives that if he receives worse rolls than his opponent in any given game, then the game is not "fair". Often complains about "streaks". Does not care about the randomness of the dice, just wants dice to give Equal results to everyone.
- The Would-Be Conqueror: blames the dice for his own strategical mistakes. Whenever he loses a game, it's the dices fault. Whenever he wins, it's because his strategy was supreme despite the odds being stacked against him. Shares many traits with the Conspiracy Theorist. Tends to get very aggravated when someone suggests re-evaluating his game strategy.
- The Nutty Professor: spends obscene amounts of time obsessing about the dice, recording stats, posting long posts about how his own mathematical formulas and theories prove that the dice are "broken". Somehow, with all his supreme intelligence, still never manages to come up with a better formula/system for the dice.
- The Tempera-Mental: this guy is an on-off dice complainer. He only gets really mad at the dice when he loses an important game because of dice rolls (or perceives losing because of dice rolls) and vents his anger on the forums. Isn't really committed to the lifestyle of dice-complaining. However, if this type gets bored with his life and too obsessed with CC, he can sometimes (d)evolve into one of the other dice-complainer types.