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I feel like a monster......

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I feel like a monster......

Postby tkr4lf on Sun Oct 03, 2010 2:35 pm

So, I was helping my mom in the backyard today. She has a fountain that sit's on the ground, which is hollow underneath. We were moving it onto the porch from the yard. Apparently, a rat burrowed underneath and set up a nest for it's newborn baby rats.

Now, my mom and I decided that we had to kill them, otherwise she would have a rat problem soon. So, I told her to go inside, and I grabbed a large rock. I then threw it down on top of them. I heard them sqeaking in pain and terror. So, I picked it back up and did it again, hoping to kill them quickly. I still heard more squeaks. So I picked up the rock and bashed at the pile repeatedly until I heard nothing. The poor things were in pieces.

The thing is, I can't get the image of the innocent babies just chilling there, no hair yet and their eyes not even open. Then the image of their tattered bodies and the sounds of their squeaks of pain keep haunting me. I feel like a monster. It was something that had to be done, so I "manned up" and did it, even though I didn't want to. I just can't get those images out of my head now.

So, I guess the point of this thread is to get this off my chest, and maybe to see if anybody else has had any experiences like this and has any advice for me.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby The Bison King on Sun Oct 03, 2010 2:44 pm

GOD.... that sounds so brutal. Well if it makes you feel better I've been down this road myself. I love animals, never want to hurt them, but my dads a landscaper and a gardener so he's basically at war with animals. This one time we caught a chipmunk in a have a heart trap. We just got a new cat and we wanted to train it to kill rodents like that in the garden, so we decided to wound the poor thing and let the cat catch. You know, get the the taste of blood? So we shoot it in the leg with a b.b. gun, and let it go. The cat completely ignores it and it crawls on it's 2 front legs into a rock wall where no one can get to it. Presumably it died in there, crippled and bleeding.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that these things happen and that it's a cruel terrible world. You merely acted as another cruel and unforgiving aspect of nature at that time, and maybe you learned that as a person you have choices that other creatures do not have. In the future you can find another way, but if not well, take solace in knowing that if an owl had got them it probably would have been just as brutal.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby tkr4lf on Sun Oct 03, 2010 3:10 pm

The Bison King wrote:GOD.... that sounds so brutal. Well if it makes you feel better I've been down this road myself. I love animals, never want to hurt them, but my dads a landscaper and a gardener so he's basically at war with animals. This one time we caught a chipmunk in a have a heart trap. We just got a new cat and we wanted to train it to kill rodents like that in the garden, so we decided to wound the poor thing and let the cat catch. You know, get the the taste of blood? So we shoot it in the leg with a b.b. gun, and let it go. The cat completely ignores it and it crawls on it's 2 front legs into a rock wall where no one can get to it. Presumably it died in there, crippled and bleeding.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that these things happen and that it's a cruel terrible world. You merely acted as another cruel and unforgiving aspect of nature at that time, and maybe you learned that as a person you have choices that other creatures do not have. In the future you can find another way, but if not well, take solace in knowing that if an owl had got them it probably would have been just as brutal.

Yeah, I guess you're right. It is a cruel and terrible world, that is for sure. I would have liked to find another way, but I could think of nothing. My mom has a very small backyard, so the only thing to do other than kill them, was to throw them over the fence into the small alley-way type thing seperating her backyard from the backyards of others. And I figure they would either starve to death, or be eaten by something. I couldn't really find any other humane way to kill them, either. I had the water hose on, but I figured drowning them would be even crueler.

Just to clear things up, I would have had no problem with this had they been adult rats. But killing babies of any species is a different thing entirely, to me at least. It just had to be done to keep them from becoming a problem in her yard or her house. And I tried to make it as quick and painless as possible, it just backfired on me, in a bit of a brutal and gruesome way. And, I am an animal lover as well. I don't like harming any animals. But certain ones, such as rodents, are such a nuissance and a problem, that it is better to kill them than let them live and make your life a living hell. I don't know, I feel like a murderer lol. But, it will pass, and I will forget about it. Just feeling kinda bad about it right now.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby Juan_Bottom on Sun Oct 03, 2010 3:24 pm

The Bison King wrote:You know, get the the taste of blood? So we shoot it in the leg with a b.b. gun, and let it go.
:o
Wow you guys are awful human beings. Even Cattle get slaughtered in a more thoughtful way! It was just a Chipmunk. You couldn't at least give it the chance to live?
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby tkr4lf on Sun Oct 03, 2010 3:30 pm

Juan_Bottom wrote:
The Bison King wrote:You know, get the the taste of blood? So we shoot it in the leg with a b.b. gun, and let it go.
:o
Wow you guys are awful human beings. Even Cattle get slaughtered in a more thoughtful way! It was just a Chipmunk. You couldn't at least give it the chance to live?

Lol, hey thanks for that man. I didn't feel bad enough already. No, but seriously, I really didn't know what else to do. I thought what I did would be the quickest way, as it turns out, it was not. Lesson learned. Next time, just throw them over the fence and then the blood is not on my hands, but they aren't in my mom's yard. Problem solved. At least I wont feel as bad.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby GabonX on Sun Oct 03, 2010 3:48 pm

We are all connected to the dark circle of life..
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby jimboston on Sun Oct 03, 2010 4:10 pm

Get over it. You killed some rats. Go have a beer and make sure you wash your hands well.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby Woodruff on Sun Oct 03, 2010 4:54 pm

tkr4lf wrote:So, I was helping my mom in the backyard today. She has a fountain that sit's on the ground, which is hollow underneath. We were moving it onto the porch from the yard. Apparently, a rat burrowed underneath and set up a nest for it's newborn baby rats.

Now, my mom and I decided that we had to kill them, otherwise she would have a rat problem soon. So, I told her to go inside, and I grabbed a large rock. I then threw it down on top of them. I heard them sqeaking in pain and terror. So, I picked it back up and did it again, hoping to kill them quickly. I still heard more squeaks. So I picked up the rock and bashed at the pile repeatedly until I heard nothing. The poor things were in pieces.

The thing is, I can't get the image of the innocent babies just chilling there, no hair yet and their eyes not even open. Then the image of their tattered bodies and the sounds of their squeaks of pain keep haunting me. I feel like a monster. It was something that had to be done, so I "manned up" and did it, even though I didn't want to. I just can't get those images out of my head now.

So, I guess the point of this thread is to get this off my chest, and maybe to see if anybody else has had any experiences like this and has any advice for me.


Truthfully, I see no problem with this. Could it have been done more humanely? Possibly...at some considerable expense or at potential risk of your own safety (trying to do it yourself). You did what, quite honestly, needed to be done, unfortunately. And, most importantly, you didn't like it particularly (as Juan points out below).
Last edited by Woodruff on Sun Oct 03, 2010 4:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby Juan_Bottom on Sun Oct 03, 2010 4:58 pm

tkr4lf wrote:Lesson learned.

Oh yeah, your act of violent mega-murder in the first degree was somewhat understandable, given the context and all. By "you guys" I meant Bison and his dad. Sorry for the confusion. You're all right, especially since you feel guilty. That's human.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby Woodruff on Sun Oct 03, 2010 4:59 pm

tkr4lf wrote:
Juan_Bottom wrote:
The Bison King wrote:You know, get the the taste of blood? So we shoot it in the leg with a b.b. gun, and let it go.
:o
Wow you guys are awful human beings. Even Cattle get slaughtered in a more thoughtful way! It was just a Chipmunk. You couldn't at least give it the chance to live?

Lol, hey thanks for that man. I didn't feel bad enough already. No, but seriously, I really didn't know what else to do. I thought what I did would be the quickest way, as it turns out, it was not. Lesson learned. Next time, just throw them over the fence and then the blood is not on my hands, but they aren't in my mom's yard. Problem solved. At least I wont feel as bad.


Though they may shortly be in your mom's HOUSE if you do that...
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby tkr4lf on Sun Oct 03, 2010 6:03 pm

jimboston wrote:Get over it. You killed some rats. Go have a beer and make sure you wash your hands well.

Well, my problem wasn't that I killed some rats. I would have no problem with that. I don't like rats. Hell, who does?

My problem was that they were babies. I mean fresh babies. Absolutely no hair, eyes hadn't even opened up yet. And I know some people may not see a difference, but I do. Killing a baby of any species is not a cool thing to do, in my book. But, I had no choice, as they would grow up into adult rats and infest my mom's yard/house.

And really, my main problem was that my plan for a quick and humane death backfired on me and turned out to be a slow, painful death for at least 3 or 4 of them. (There were about 7 of them in the nest.) Like I said, first I threw the large rock down on the nest, hoping to kill all of them. When that didn't work, and I heard them squealing in pain, I tried it again rather quickly, thinking "Oh please, just die. I don't want to hurt ya'll." That still didn't kill all of them, so I had to pick up the rock and bash the nest three more times, cave man style.

And then, after I heard no more squealing, I had to lift the rock and look at their mangled, bloody bodies as I shoveled dirt over them, in the hopes that the mother will not find them and they will decompose. I'm not tryin to come off as a pussy or anything, it just bothered me that they had to suffer. They did nothing to deserve that, other than being what they are.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby tkr4lf on Sun Oct 03, 2010 6:05 pm

Woodruff wrote:
tkr4lf wrote:
Juan_Bottom wrote:
The Bison King wrote:You know, get the the taste of blood? So we shoot it in the leg with a b.b. gun, and let it go.
:o
Wow you guys are awful human beings. Even Cattle get slaughtered in a more thoughtful way! It was just a Chipmunk. You couldn't at least give it the chance to live?

Lol, hey thanks for that man. I didn't feel bad enough already. No, but seriously, I really didn't know what else to do. I thought what I did would be the quickest way, as it turns out, it was not. Lesson learned. Next time, just throw them over the fence and then the blood is not on my hands, but they aren't in my mom's yard. Problem solved. At least I wont feel as bad.


Though they may shortly be in your mom's HOUSE if you do that...

Which is why I did what I did. I didn't want her to end up having to call an exterminator here in a couple of months or however long it takes rats to mature into adults. I'm not proud of it, it's just something that had to be done.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby tkr4lf on Sun Oct 03, 2010 6:09 pm

Juan_Bottom wrote:
tkr4lf wrote:Lesson learned.

Oh yeah, your act of violent mega-murder in the first degree was somewhat understandable, given the context and all. By "you guys" I meant Bison and his dad. Sorry for the confusion. You're all right, especially since you feel guilty. That's human.

Ok. Yeah, I was confused and thought you were referring to both of us. And, yeah, I do feel guilty. I don't know how anybody could not. I may be wrong, but I remember reading somewhere that enjoying the torturing of animals is a sign of psychopathy, and perhaps an early sign of a serial killer as well. It is sad that some people enjoy doing this.

And, I think that is a big reason it bothered me so much as well, because I'm so against animal cruelty. And yet, that is exactly what I am guilty of. Not on purpose, of course, just that my plan backfired. But, like I said, lesson learned.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby Lootifer on Sun Oct 03, 2010 6:26 pm

I feel your pain, I once tried to kill a rooster with incorrect tools for the job and it ended up pretty messy.

My, and your, errors was not in the killing itself. We were both getting rid of pests (and trust me wild roosters who live at the back of your section are pests just as much as rats). Our errors was in the inhumane way we approached the problem. You should have donned some gardening gloves and quickly broken the necks or each of the babies. As quick and as humane as you could get (under the circumstances - you're still killing innocent animals after all ><). You've learned your lesson (just as I did many years ago) and I hope you are better for it.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby tkr4lf on Sun Oct 03, 2010 6:35 pm

Lootifer wrote:I feel your pain, I once tried to kill a rooster with incorrect tools for the job and it ended up pretty messy.

My, and your, errors was not in the killing itself. We were both getting rid of pests (and trust me wild roosters who live at the back of your section are pests just as much as rats). Our errors was in the inhumane way we approached the problem. You should have donned some gardening gloves and quickly broken the necks or each of the babies. As quick and as humane as you could get (under the circumstances - you're still killing innocent animals after all ><). You've learned your lesson (just as I did many years ago) and I hope you are better for it.

That's a good suggestion for how to handle the problem. I've been trying to think of a better way I could have handled the situation, given what I had around me. And I could have definitely done this. Well, If anything similar happens again, I will have a much better way to handle the situation.

And thanks to all for the similar stories and advice/support. It has helped put this in perspective for me. I appreciate it.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby The Bison King on Sun Oct 03, 2010 7:48 pm

Juan_Bottom wrote:
The Bison King wrote:You know, get the the taste of blood? So we shoot it in the leg with a b.b. gun, and let it go.
:o
Wow you guys are awful human beings. Even Cattle get slaughtered in a more thoughtful way! It was just a Chipmunk. You couldn't at least give it the chance to live?

look man I know. I was a bad decision ok. It's not like we we're purposely torturing a chipmunk we were trying to train a cat. But as I've learned over the years that's completely impossible. We all live and learn man.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby Juan_Bottom on Sun Oct 03, 2010 8:18 pm

tkr4lf wrote:I would have no problem with that. I don't like rats. Hell, who does

Some quick context about me:
I live in the country, and have worked as a farm hand.
I have had to slaughter animals before. But I have never skinned or cleaned any.
I worked in the seasonal/agricultural department of a regional chain store.


That said, I genuinely like rats. I know that they can be quite a pest, but I have a lot of respect for the wild rat's will to survive, and their higher level of intelligence. They make great pets, and can be cute in their own way.
I've never advocated killing any wild animals, and steadfastly refused when I worked in the agricultural department to teach people how to do it. I always recommend have♄a♄heart live animal traps. I can think of 6 home-made poisons off the top of my head to kill anything from dogs to mice. But! in this day in age I don't see the need for it.
Rats however, have always been a serious problem for farmers. In that instance I can of course recommend a few ways to get rid of them. All farmers around here have "barn cats" which are abandoned and unwanted pets that get dumped on farms or out in the country and find their way to one. They are the farmers "natural" pest control. So I am always cautious with poison because of that... and even more cautious with a trap.
So, if I were you tkr4lf I would have done one of two things. Either the rock thing... or tried to trap the mother/shoot her cleanly and tried to give the babies to a local pet shop. They may take them for feed,... but I'm not sure on the legality of that. You did what I would do, and I'm an animal lover too.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby Phatscotty on Sun Oct 03, 2010 8:21 pm

tkr4lf wrote:So, I was helping my mom in the backyard today. She has a fountain that sit's on the ground, which is hollow underneath. We were moving it onto the porch from the yard. Apparently, a rat burrowed underneath and set up a nest for it's newborn baby rats.

Now, my mom and I decided that we had to kill them, otherwise she would have a rat problem soon. So, I told her to go inside, and I grabbed a large rock. I then threw it down on top of them. I heard them sqeaking in pain and terror. So, I picked it back up and did it again, hoping to kill them quickly. I still heard more squeaks. So I picked up the rock and bashed at the pile repeatedly until I heard nothing. The poor things were in pieces.

The thing is, I can't get the image of the innocent babies just chilling there, no hair yet and their eyes not even open. Then the image of their tattered bodies and the sounds of their squeaks of pain keep haunting me. I feel like a monster. It was something that had to be done, so I "manned up" and did it, even though I didn't want to. I just can't get those images out of my head now.

So, I guess the point of this thread is to get this off my chest, and maybe to see if anybody else has had any experiences like this and has any advice for me.


Part of being a man
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby Snorri1234 on Sun Oct 03, 2010 8:25 pm

tkr4lf wrote:So, I was helping my mom in the backyard today. She has a fountain that sit's on the ground, which is hollow underneath. We were moving it onto the porch from the yard. Apparently, a rat burrowed underneath and set up a nest for it's newborn baby rats.

Now, my mom and I decided that we had to kill them, otherwise she would have a rat problem soon. So, I told her to go inside, and I grabbed a large rock. I then threw it down on top of them. I heard them sqeaking in pain and terror. So, I picked it back up and did it again, hoping to kill them quickly. I still heard more squeaks. So I picked up the rock and bashed at the pile repeatedly until I heard nothing. The poor things were in pieces.

The thing is, I can't get the image of the innocent babies just chilling there, no hair yet and their eyes not even open. Then the image of their tattered bodies and the sounds of their squeaks of pain keep haunting me. I feel like a monster. It was something that had to be done, so I "manned up" and did it, even though I didn't want to. I just can't get those images out of my head now.

So, I guess the point of this thread is to get this off my chest, and maybe to see if anybody else has had any experiences like this and has any advice for me.


Oh man, that turned me on.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby The Bison King on Sun Oct 03, 2010 8:26 pm

Part of being a man


didn't you say you were 12 ;)

(I don't know what to believe on the internet I am completely incapable of reading internet sarcasm)
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby Phatscotty on Sun Oct 03, 2010 8:31 pm

The Bison King wrote:
Part of being a man


didn't you say you were 12 ;)

(I don't know what to believe on the internet I am completely incapable of reading internet sarcasm)


no, but when i was 12, my grandpa made me kill my pet duck. it got attacked by a raccoon and the eyes were gone and all his feathers on his head were gone. What I did was put it in a box and bury it 95% except for the head, and took a spade shovel (so I didnt have to see the horror)
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby The Bison King on Sun Oct 03, 2010 8:34 pm

Phatscotty wrote:
The Bison King wrote:
Part of being a man


didn't you say you were 12 ;)

(I don't know what to believe on the internet I am completely incapable of reading internet sarcasm)


no, but when i was 12, my grandpa made me kill my pet duck. it got attacked by a raccoon and the eyes were gone and all his feathers on his head were gone. What I did was put it in a box and bury it 95% except for the head, and took a spade shovel (so I didnt have to see the horror)

:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
R U fucking kidding me??????

Ok I'm officially changing this to fucked up stories of having to kill animals.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby Juan_Bottom on Sun Oct 03, 2010 8:40 pm

yeah...
"F*cked up stories of having to kill animals" is about right...
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby The Bison King on Sun Oct 03, 2010 8:41 pm

(This one I didn't commit the crime but it's still a good story.)

So we were pulling into are driveway after a night out (my mom, brother and I) and much to our surprise there's a deer lying in the bushes of our front yard. we go over to it and realize it's been injured presumably by a car crash. So we decide to call a cor and have him take car of it. After 20 minutes the cop comes over, stands over it for a minute and say "so you know I have to shoot him right?" We say yeah (or more appropriately "duh we know, that's why we called you") So he pull out his hand gun and shoots him in the heart. We wait for the deer to stop moving and my brother and the cop grab his hind legs and start dragging him to the street. Just then the deer sticks his head up as if to say "hey! wtf is going on here". They drop the deer and he pulls out the gun again. We ask him "why not just shoot the poor thing in the head, it's not like he's moving much it wouldn't be hard." but he gives a bullshit cop reason and keeps trying to shoot him in the heart... but he keeps missing so it took him about 7 or 8 shots. All in all it ended up becoming pretty brutal.
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Re: I feel like a monster......

Postby Gold Knight on Sun Oct 03, 2010 8:54 pm

Over the summer I had a job landscaping to pick up extra money. We had the same schedule every week, so I basically got to the area and just went about my own business. Anyway, get to a housing development about 7:15AM and get out one of the push mowers to do a smaller fenced-in backyard. Walk into the backyard and theres a rabbit sitting in the middle of the yard, runs past me out the gate as i start in. I think no big deal, and start mowing.

I get to about the middle of the lawn, and notice a bunch of decoration spider webs all bunched up in the lawn, figuring they just got thrown out by the homeowner and they would just get torn up by the mower. Well, I was wrong...

Happens that the rabbit was actually sitting on a nest of baby rabbits just born, and they stood no chance against the mower as i ran over the nest. I couldnt see them because the webs had been used as a camoflague-technique by the mother. Well, as soon as I hit it, blood and small body parts were sprayed all over the wooden fence and sent propelling through the air. It was a rough sight to see that early in the morning...
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