It is with great pleasure that I bring you the 100th PureStink-endorsed Conquer Club post. We've had some good times over the last 99 posts (thanks TeeGee for facilitating the most smelly BBQ I have ever experienced last weekend), and I'm sure there will be many more to come. As I always tell the ladies, there's plenty of stink to go around
So what have I learned over the last 99 posts? Well, the Conquer Club user base appears to be dwindling by the day. When approached outside of the International House Of Stink, BigWham was unavailable for comment.
Fortunately, there is a core group of people who enjoy repetitively playing oddly specific combinations of settings on Das Schloss. I imagine it's a bit like when you find the perfect porno (three women, one of whom looks like Saxi's mom, and one hairy guy with an odour problem) and you keep going back to it, jacking every last ounce of dopamine out of it to suppress the fear of your own rolls (dice or otherwise). Honestly, those potential new users don't know what they're missing.
I would like to thank the following individuals, without whom I would not be stinking here today:
- Owen's Hooter for his unwavering commitment to the general congratulations thread
- 2dimes for frequenting this board for over 16 years
- Nut Shot Scott for typing that extra T every time
- JP4F for playing for actually playing for fun (I assume)
- Saxitoxin for making the toxic sexy
- Big Tough Ralf for his principled opinions on Ireland
- Jim Boston for somehow not getting banned yet
- King Achilles for his brutal efficiency in serving up Conquer Club brand justice
- Shannon Apple for her thoughtful rebuttal of cheating
- Gary Denton for actually being made of LEGO in real life
- Dukasaur for fielding the greatest FAQ thread of all time
- Mookie McGee for never replying to my top secret wall post
- ConfederateSS for his undeniable patriotism
I look forward to smelling you on the battlefield.
PS