The Manipulative Ego Boosting Thread

[BigBallinStalin]

I almost had sex last night with a very hot but omg so ugly face girl. I was drunk and I think it was all a plan. In such a small town, it will become a nightmare. I might have to kill myself.

Good luck with that.
I suppose it's the price of being shallow?

Does badgering people really boost their self-esteem, Dr. Evil?

Surely... you could do better...

Ahem... let me try again.

Look on the bright side nietzche, at least you won't get her pregnant and wind up having ugly children.

I feel that Funkyterrance is not negative enough. He's depriving us of some good times, and that is unfair....

[Timminz]

I've got an interview at one of the largest financial services companies in the world, in about an hour and a half.

Woe is me.

Where do you see yourself in a years time?

What's your biggest weakness?

Prep the problem questions.

Name a situation in which you have used communication to solve a problem.

gringo is closer to the appropriate style of interview. I would much rather answer Symm's style though: they're easy.

1) considering the jobs all start approximately 345 days from now, that's a no-brainer.

2) the 0.13 I am missing from a perfect GPA.

[fadedpsychosis]

This is the thread where we make fallacious remarks in order to secure more love and attention from others.

Ready? Begin:

I was almost diagnosed with cancer today... in case anybody cares...

Gotchya beat; I WAS

I probably will be. my dad and his dad both died of cancer rather young (49 for my dad, 39 for my grandfather) and both my grandmother and aunt on my mother's side have fought cancer...

[notyou2]

I cut my fingernails too short and now it is very difficult to pick my nose.

[Symmetry]

I cut my fingernails too short and now it is very difficult to pick my nose.

A good plastic surgeon should be able to help you with that. They have catalogs, and you can pick whichever one you like.

[daddy1gringo]

I was thinking of posting something, but nobody wants to hear what I have to say anyway.

[Haggis_McMutton]

I wanted to make a white russian yesterday but I had run out of milk.

Update for everyone waiting with bated breath.
Bought milk, gonna have said white russian tonight.

[Dukasaur]

Nobody commented on my story so I'm sure as hell not going to comment on yours.

[BigBallinStalin]

I wanted to make a white russian yesterday but I had run out of milk.

Update for everyone waiting with bated breath.
Bought milk, gonna have said white russian tonight.

I would be jealous, but ever since I was molested by a dog, I caught a virus which makes me allergic to alcohol. Even if I take the smallest sip, I'll have a stroke.

[jonesthecurl]

I almost had sex last night with a very hot but omg so ugly face girl. I was drunk and I think it was all a plan. In such a small town, it will become a nightmare. I might have to kill myself.

Good luck with that.
I suppose it's the price of being shallow?

Does badgering people really boost their self-esteem, Dr. Evil?

Surely... you could do better...

Does telling people they can do better really boost ego?
Can't you do better than that?

[BigBallinStalin]

I almost had sex last night with a very hot but omg so ugly face girl. I was drunk and I think it was all a plan. In such a small town, it will become a nightmare. I might have to kill myself.

Good luck with that.
I suppose it's the price of being shallow?

Does badgering people really boost their self-esteem, Dr. Evil?

Surely... you could do better...

Does telling people they can do better really boost ego?
Can't you do better than that?