Worst first date

by **HitRed** on Sat Jun 30, 2018 12:25 am

When I was a teenager I asked a girl I liked out. This was my first date. She was into Disney movies and classics like Singing in the Rain. We had a nice early dinner.

Then I bought two tickets at the local theater. Dances with Wolves. Never heard of it. I looked at the poster. Sounded good, *dancing*, buffalo and Kevin Costner. What could go wrong?

The movie started off with a Civil War battle where Costner tries to commit suicide, one soldier got vividly shot though the head and then Costner ended up in an amputation clinic. Ouch!

Costner moves out to the West and meets a superior officer that wets on himself and commits suicide.

Moving across the plaines Costner meets a girl in native dress. Great! Bring on some tinder moments to save this date. Nope, she is committing suicide too and is bad at it.

Costner makes peace with the Indians then joins them in battle. The Tribe likes to fight at close quarters...very close quarters! Short range shotgun blasts sending enemies flying. Brutal tomahawks deep into chests and scalping, yes we need more bloody scalping.

The date was a disaster. I apologized repeatedly. Took her home and without so much as a handshake she was gone.

HitRed

by **Bernie Sanders** on Sat Jun 30, 2018 4:24 am

*dork*

by **tkr4lf** on Sat Jun 30, 2018 6:49 am

You should have at least touched her ass before leaving.

by **2dimes** on Sat Jun 30, 2018 6:58 am

Don't mind Burn he's pretending it would have gone down better if he was involved.

I guess you could have offered to leave the film and ask for a credit to watch something else but who's going to be that sharp as a teenager?

Mike Jackson portrayed perfectly how most young guys would handle taking a lady to a scary movie at the start of his video for The Thriller. Later re-named to just "Thriller".

I finally got a date with a friend's sister once and was over excited because she was really pretty and a sweet morman. I showed her all sorts of cool places in our city, several of which she had never seen and claimed to enjoy.

Later she would pretend to be busy and not come to the phone. Her sister told me a week or two after, she didn't like me and said I talked too much.

Oh well I have seen her on FriendFace and she didn't age well, I dodged two bullets between that and the magic underwear.

Both my parents smoked heavily, I had no idea until I bought a house, that I smelled like cigarette smoke and it's nasty if you don't live with heavy smokers.

by **patches70** on Sat Jun 30, 2018 6:46 pm

Dude, the first mistake is you never. ever. take a first date to a movie. Ever. It's not the absolute worst place to take a first date, but it's up there in the top ten worst things to do on a first date.

Live and learn

by **thegreekdog** on Sat Jun 30, 2018 8:37 pm

My brother set me up on a blind date with a sister of a friend. I showed up at her house and was pleasantly surprised. She was quite attractive and seemed nice. We went to a pretty nice restaurant. The discussion centered primarily on how her friends were mean and how anything bad in her life was not her fault. At one point the water filled up our waters and she said "I hate when they fill up waters when the water isn't empty. It makes me so mad." So I drank a bit of my water and the waiter immediately came over and refilled it. She gave me a look and did the disgusted sigh thing. I took her home and she asked "Do you want to hook up?" I said "Well, I"m never going out with you again." She said, "Yeah, I don't think this is going to work, but I want to hook up anyway."

Moral of the story - First dates are hard but can be fun.

by **HitRed** on Sat Jun 30, 2018 10:31 pm

So she had this cute friend that wore bright jumpsuits and drove a purple pickup truck. Trucks are cool in Texas especially with girls are driving them. I really liked her. Called her up and got a date. On the day of the date I got terribly sick and had to cancel. She was understanding and we chose another day. This repeated itself 4 times! Each time getting sick and canceling. I finally had to face facts and realize for some reason...unknown to me...it wasn't ment to be.

by **Symmetry** on Sat Jun 30, 2018 11:18 pm

All first date disasters are because of a failure to communicate, in my experience.

by **Dukasaur** on Sun Jul 01, 2018 12:21 am

Symmetry wrote:All first date disasters are because of a failure to communicate, in my experience.

Some men you just can't reach.

by **Symmetry** on Sun Jul 01, 2018 12:28 am

Dukasaur wrote:
Symmetry wrote:All first date disasters are because of a failure to communicate, in my experience.

Some men you just can't reach.

Lol- do think it's just men?

by **Bernie Sanders** on Sun Jul 01, 2018 7:26 am

Women want to be entertained on their first date. If you can make them giggle and laugh, you are making huge progress toward mating.

You just can't wash off the dork in one day and become an accomplished player.

by **Dukasaur** on Sun Jul 01, 2018 7:36 am

Symmetry wrote:
Dukasaur wrote:
Symmetry wrote:All first date disasters are because of a failure to communicate, in my experience.

Some men you just can't reach.

Lol- do think it's just men?

Whoosh!

by **HitRed** on Sun Jul 01, 2018 8:14 am

Symmetry wrote:All first date disasters are because of a failure to communicate, in my experience.

A few weeks later I was invited by the first girl to a prair meeting. She picked me up in her car. The meeting whet fine and we drove for a bit and parked. It was about 9:30 so it was dark. She said she wanted a hug. So I hugged her in the car and she hugged back and didn't let go! Five minutes went by, then ten. My heart was racing. What's should I do? Then 15 min, then 20! What's going on here? 25 min the 30! Does she love me? 35 then 40 min. Wow, this is great! At 45 min, gathering all my curage, I pulled back a bit and went for the kiss. She pulled back too and kicked me out of her car. Said she didn't see me that way. I was 10 miles from the dorms, it was dark and I had no cell phone. I walked in the darkness which matched in many ways my understanding of girls.

by **KoolBak** on Sun Jul 01, 2018 8:35 am

I recall when I was 14 and a 17 year old cute chick that rode our bus (1.5 hours each way for school) decided we should have a "date". So I rode my bike to her house (15 miles...grew up in the boonies) when she told me to, she took me inside chatted, gave me lemonade, then dragged me in her bedroom for my very first amazing introduction to the fairer sex.....mmmmmmm......THAT was a good date.

by **King_Herpes** on Sun Jul 01, 2018 11:29 am

HitRed wrote:So she had this cute friend that wore bright jumpsuits and drove a purple pickup truck. Trucks are cool in Texas especially with girls are driving them. I really liked her. Called her up and got a date. On the day of the date I got terribly sick and had to cancel. She was understanding and we chose another day. This repeated itself 4 times! Each time getting sick and canceling. I finally had to face facts and realize for some reason...unknown to me...it wasn't ment to be.

Oh no, not the purple people eater truck. Sadly it drove through my state too and well.

Here I am.

by **mookiemcgee** on Sun Jul 01, 2018 12:41 pm

Symmetry wrote:
Dukasaur wrote:
Symmetry wrote:All first date disasters are because of a failure to communicate, in my experience.

Some men you just can't reach.

Lol- do think it's just men?

You and Duk should go on a second date, and this time Symm try listening and not just talking the whole time.

by **iAmCaffeine** on Sun Jul 01, 2018 1:56 pm

HitRed wrote:
Symmetry wrote:All first date disasters are because of a failure to communicate, in my experience.

A few weeks later I was invited by the first girl to a prair meeting. She picked me up in her car. The meeting whet fine and we drove for a bit and parked. It was about 9:30 so it was dark. She said she wanted a hug. So I hugged her in the car and she hugged back and didn't let go! Five minutes went by, then ten. My heart was racing. What's should I do? Then 15 min, then 20! What's going on here? 25 min the 30! Does she love me? 35 then 40 min. Wow, this is great! At 45 min, gathering all my curage, I pulled back a bit and went for the kiss. She pulled back too and kicked me out of her car. Said she didn't see me that way. I was 10 miles from the dorms, it was dark and I had no cell phone. I walked in the darkness which matched in many ways my understanding of girls.

I can't believe you waited 40 fucking minutes to make a move. Holy.

by **Bernie Sanders** on Sun Jul 01, 2018 1:59 pm

iAmCaffeine wrote:
HitRed wrote:
Symmetry wrote:All first date disasters are because of a failure to communicate, in my experience.

A few weeks later I was invited by the first girl to a prair meeting. She picked me up in her car. The meeting whet fine and we drove for a bit and parked. It was about 9:30 so it was dark. She said she wanted a hug. So I hugged her in the car and she hugged back and didn't let go! Five minutes went by, then ten. My heart was racing. What's should I do? Then 15 min, then 20! What's going on here? 25 min the 30! Does she love me? 35 then 40 min. Wow, this is great! At 45 min, gathering all my curage, I pulled back a bit and went for the kiss. She pulled back too and kicked me out of her car. Said she didn't see me that way. I was 10 miles from the dorms, it was dark and I had no cell phone. I walked in the darkness which matched in many ways my understanding of girls.

I can't believe you waited 40 fucking minutes to make a move. Holy.

Exclamation: *dork*

by **King_Herpes** on Sun Jul 01, 2018 3:28 pm

if someone were to have hugged me for 40 minutes and sequentially disallowed me to slip some tongue then I would've went full The ram incel on their ass and keyed "prude" all along the side of their car in giant bubble letters.

Mixed signals like that are why we have so many crimes of passion, a real life issue not helping our current predicament on the whole.

Cue Benjikat's Widow...