Mr Nate wrote:Backglass - I'm not going to pretend that I can shatter my hermeneutic spiral. I can't. But please be aware of yours. You say that you were free to choose whatever religion you wanted. I'm going to tell you that the current culture pushes people toward athiesm. That's what the "enlightenment" has done for the west. So you are a product of the culture you grew up in as much as I am. Dewey is not, since he was not raised in a Christian environment. But he didn't break his worldview, God did.
Then what of me Nate. I grew up in a small village in the UK. My parents weren't religious, I say weren't because as they have approached the time of reckoning they seem to have found God more and more, I guess its like insurance. There wasn't much to do in my village so I joined the church, they had quizzes at Sunday school, I like quizzes, and cakes, I like cakes even more, and singing, thats fun too.
So I went to church every week, and sunday school, and to friends houses whose parents were at the church, my folks, at that time thought it was funny but harmless.
It was one of those funny churches where everybody dances and sings, you have lots of them in the states, but over here they are less common, especially back then. Occassionally everybody would 'heal' one of the congregation, we would stand with our hands out-stretched and let the power flow through us into the one being healed. Some people even shaked with the power of the Lord coursing through them, quite a lot in fact.
I never shaked. I believed everything I was told, but for some reason God never chose me to pass his power through. For a while I thought there was something wrong with me, that I musn't be worthy of his power or love. That was kind of upsetting. After a while I started to pretend to feel it and shook along with everyone else, revelling in the power of the lord, but deep down I felt awful because I knew I was a fraud.
And then I realised, everyone else was faking it too. No-one really shook with the power of the lord, everyone was just making it up, and I felt a lot better after that. I still went to church, there wasn't much else to do and like I said I really like quizzes, and cake. And I was happy as I knew that there was nothing wrong with me, I was just like everyone else, we all made it up, it was all just a bit of fun.
So really I changed my own world view. I had one imprinted on me by others, then through my own freewill saw that it was flawed, and making me unhappy, and changed it. My mind hasn't changed since that day, I haven't believed in God since the day I realised everyone was faking. As an adult though I'm not so inclined to see it as harmless fun.
I know I wrote that little story in a rather childish fashion, but then I was a child when this all happened so its the way it comes out. A rather stupid question I have often wondered since then, is does my baptism count, if I only did it for the cakes?