I know that you are apparently incapable of not weaseling (and I extend a genuine apology to all weasels out there) and cavilling and generally behaving with dishonour and disgrace but, go on, shock the world and pretend that you are not a flaccid pile of visionless ego propelled solely by a mindless craving for the trappings and gaudiness of power.
It is, incidentally, aimed at Boris Johnson.