Conquer Club

The sports wanker of the year awards

\\OFF-TOPIC// conversations about everything that has nothing to do with Conquer Club.

Moderator: Community Team

Forum rules
Please read the Community Guidelines before posting.

The sports wanker of the year awards

Postby heavycola on Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:07 pm

IYHO, who is the biggest wanker in sport? They could be the most talented in their field as long as they have the sort of face that demands a good shoeing and the addition of a half-pound of phlegm. Michael Shumacher comes to mind, now i think of it.

But none of your baseball no-marks please, or anyone from the padded ad-break you call football in the US. Except Barry Bonds and OJ, they get honorary mentions.

My nominees:

Marion Jones - she wins, she cheats for years while slamming all the other cheats - THEN SHE BREAKS DOWN AND CRIES ABOUT IT.

Shane Warne - maybe the best bowler ever but a walking argument for eugenics. A massive knobend.

Cristiano Ronaldo - I hate his face. This might be jealousy of the endless coke-fuelled orgies i keep reading about in the daily mirror, but mostly it's that prettyboy smirk. And for getting our own spud-faced nipper sent off in the WC.

Floyd Mayweather - obviously, obviously a gigantic bellend. I fear it is too late, and he too good, for anyone to break his nose now.

Any others?
Last edited by heavycola on Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Image
User avatar
Corporal 1st Class heavycola
 
Posts: 2925
Joined: Thu Jun 01, 2006 10:22 am
Location: Maailmanvalloittajat

Postby Norse on Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:09 pm

Ronaldo, for sure.

It has been a reccuring fantasy of mine for a while now, to break his leg, in a career ending way.
b.k. barunt wrote:Snorri's like one of those fufu dogs who get all excited and dance around pissing on themself.

suggs wrote:scared off by all the pervs and wankers already? No? Then let me introduce myself, I'm Mr Pervy Wank.
User avatar
Corporal 1st Class Norse
 
Posts: 4227
Joined: Fri Mar 16, 2007 4:14 pm
Location: Cradled in the arms of Freya.

Postby Nickbaldwin on Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:10 pm

Any professional rounders player will do.
LOCK THIS FUCKING THREAD.
LOCK THIS FUCKING THREAD.
LOCK THIS FUCKING THREAD.
LOCK THIS FUCKING THREAD.
User avatar
Captain Nickbaldwin
 
Posts: 803
Joined: Tue May 08, 2007 9:07 am
Location: Scut hole near Birmingham

Postby ignotus on Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:13 pm

Steve McClaren! - no explanation needed! :roll:
heavycola wrote:
Snorri1234 wrote:Man, this thread was great. A whopping 230 pages with noone changing their viewpoint.


I actually converted around page 198. Unfortunately, I converted to satanism.
User avatar
Lieutenant ignotus
 
Posts: 2766
Joined: Thu Sep 06, 2007 9:34 am
Location: Hanging on to my old avatar.

Re: The sports wanker of the year awards

Postby Snorri1234 on Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:18 pm

heavycola wrote:
Cristiano Ronaldo - I hate his face. This might be jealousy of the endless coke-fuelled orgies i keep reading about in the daily mirror, but mostly it's that prettyboy smirk. And for getting our own spud-faced nipper sent off in the WC.


Fully agree.
"Some motherfuckers are always trying to ice skate uphill."

Duane: You know what they say about love and war.
Tim: Yes, one involves a lot of physical and psychological pain, and the other one's war.
User avatar
Private Snorri1234
 
Posts: 3438
Joined: Wed Sep 12, 2007 11:52 am
Location: Right in the middle of a fucking reptile zoo.

Postby jnd94 on Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:27 pm

http://www.thetimes.co.za/PrintEdition/ ... ?id=685737

there is an article on Ronaldo and his antics.
Captain jnd94
 
Posts: 7177
Joined: Sun Mar 11, 2007 4:22 pm

Postby heavycola on Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:31 pm

ignotus wrote:Steve McClaren! - no explanation needed! :roll:


Oh absolutely.

Image

Does this image fill you with:
a) hatred?
b) pity?
c) nausea?
d) animalistic levels of sexual arousal? (in case suggs reads this)
Image
User avatar
Corporal 1st Class heavycola
 
Posts: 2925
Joined: Thu Jun 01, 2006 10:22 am
Location: Maailmanvalloittajat

Postby Nickbaldwin on Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:41 pm

C and D, but that's just how I roll.
LOCK THIS FUCKING THREAD.
LOCK THIS FUCKING THREAD.
LOCK THIS FUCKING THREAD.
LOCK THIS FUCKING THREAD.
User avatar
Captain Nickbaldwin
 
Posts: 803
Joined: Tue May 08, 2007 9:07 am
Location: Scut hole near Birmingham

Postby Dancing Mustard on Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:41 pm

Ronaldo, McClaren; shoot the pair of them and I wouldn't shed a tear.
Wayne wrote:Wow, with a voice like that Dancing Mustard must get all the babes!

Garth wrote:Yeah, I bet he's totally studly and buff.
User avatar
Corporal Dancing Mustard
 
Posts: 5442
Joined: Mon Mar 19, 2007 3:31 pm
Location: Pushing Buttons

Postby ignotus on Sun Jan 20, 2008 5:43 pm

Dancing Mustard wrote:Ronaldo, McClaren; shoot the pair of them and I wouldn't shed a tear.


I will buy a drink to the person who does that anytime. Any other volunteers? :wink:
heavycola wrote:
Snorri1234 wrote:Man, this thread was great. A whopping 230 pages with noone changing their viewpoint.


I actually converted around page 198. Unfortunately, I converted to satanism.
User avatar
Lieutenant ignotus
 
Posts: 2766
Joined: Thu Sep 06, 2007 9:34 am
Location: Hanging on to my old avatar.

Postby brooksieb on Mon Jan 21, 2008 3:39 pm

ronaldo definately, and mclaren
User avatar
Corporal brooksieb
 
Posts: 1060
Joined: Sun Jul 22, 2007 4:44 pm

Postby heavycola on Tue Jan 22, 2008 4:14 am

brooksieb wrote:ronaldo definately, and mclaren


Mclaren is a commentator on Setanto now. With a face that begs to be punched repeatedly until it folds in on itself like a ruined souffle.
Image
User avatar
Corporal 1st Class heavycola
 
Posts: 2925
Joined: Thu Jun 01, 2006 10:22 am
Location: Maailmanvalloittajat


Return to Acceptable Content

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users