Did Jesus masturbate?

[natty dread]

I posit that he did and churches should start serving milk on communions.

[mviola]

I posit that he did and churches should start serving milk on communions.

The holy sperm...

[john9blue]

what evidence do you have?

wait...shit, why do i keep asking you people for evidence? you never have any!

[TheProwler]

what evidence do you have?

wait...shit, why do i keep asking you people for evidence? you never have any!

Did the Bible ever mention Jesus' balls exploding?










I think that's evidence enough.

[maasman]

I must say I approve of your avatar natty.

[The Bison King]

Is that what the shroud of Turin was used for?

[safariguy5]

When you spend your time with 12 male apostles, don't you have to?

[cyrenius]

Hehehe , you know how it works, if you jerk your eyes out your orbit you think that everybody does it , or you hope everybody does it so you don't seem to be a freak. In psichology it's called projection. And of course you will search for other freaks who think like you so you can feel normal.
So my advice, you are 28, find yourself a girlfriend(or how many you need) and stop jerking of

[guardian1357]

why would he have to?

He could just do a miracle and indunce a feeling of absolute sexual bliss upon himself...
geez in your attempt to be disrespctful you look dumb and dont think things through

[natty dread]

Ah but the poll results speak for themselves.

you look dumb

Look who's talking.

[natty dread]

what evidence do you have?

wait...shit, why do i keep asking you people for evidence? you never have any!

I have anecdotal evidence.

[Joodoo]

A better question would be : Was he even capable?

[angola]

I think so.

He was fully human, so he either scrapped out or he had wet dreams, based on a general theory (and one I was informed of by a guy in college) it is apparently possible to not scrap out for like 3 weeks and then stare at a wall and not think about anything while masturbating.

So, if this guy from Oklahoma could do that - and not think about fucking the shit out of all the co-eds walking around - then I'm guessing the Son of God could definitely toss one off while staring at the hinterlands of the Middle East.

I assume the sin in masturbating is thinking sexual thoughts - though if you think about your wife (I know, har-har-har) I assume it's not a sin? - so, if you have the discipline to just stare at the wall and think about nothing sexual, then it's not a sin, right?

[natty dread]

It's not a sin either way.

[angola]

It's not a sin either way.

That may be, but for the sake of argument, assuming it is - to think about fucking the shit out of men/women depending on your sexual thoughts, then it is an interesting and important distinction.

And I side with no sin, mainly because I like to scrap out when I wake up each day. Unless my wife tells me I can't. Then I can't.

[cyrenius]

Ah but the poll results speak for themselves.

Motto: The pervertion is in the eye of the beholders

The poll results only reflect that you found yourself a flock, you can start your own sect now

I can only laugh at how retarded is this poll, never crossed my mind to vote

[natty dread]

I can only laugh at how retarded is this poll, never crossed my mind to vote

In other words, you're ashamed of your own wanking. Don't worry, it gets easier with age.

[natty dread]

Ok so where's the Jesus Squad and why aren't we getting any answers from them?

tzor, lionz, etc. I'm waiting. What does teh bibleh say about this?

[Mageplunka69]

i hear that the "holy grail" holds the DNA of Jesus and that's why its kept so hidden. that's where Mary would spit the gism instead of swallowing the magical wine

[cyrenius]

I can only laugh at how retarded is this poll, never crossed my mind to vote

In other words, you're ashamed of your own wanking. Don't worry, it gets easier with age.

I'm not ashamend, it was good when it was, but then I grew up

[TheProwler]

Hehehe , you know how it works, if you jerk your eyes out your orbit you think that everybody does it , or you hope everybody does it so you don't seem to be a freak. In psichology it's called projection. And of course you will search for other freaks who think like you so you can feel normal.
So my advice, you are 28, find yourself a girlfriend(or how many you need) and stop jerking of

Yeah man!!

Only freaks masturbate!!!


Normal people don't.



And thank you for advising me that I'm 28. That gave me a rise.

[BigBallinStalin]

I can only laugh at how retarded is this poll, never crossed my mind to vote

In other words, you're ashamed of your own wanking. Don't worry, it gets easier with age.

I'm not ashamend, it was good when it was, but then I grew up

were you castrated?

[tzor]

tzor, lionz, etc. I'm waiting. What does teh bibleh say about this?

The LAW is rather strict on a whole number of issues relating to sex. Wasting seed was a big no no. You even example of one man who dies because he was using the withdrwal method on his dead brother's wife. (Yes, according to the LAW, if your brother dies without a son, you have a duty to make sure he has one.) Like all the things of the LAW everything is rather extreeme and connected, so it is at the same level as having sex with a woman during her period.

Since Jesus is the "fufillment" of the law, this no longer applies to Christians. The current Roman Catholic argument is based off of the virtue of Chastity, which tends to be confused with Celibacy.

[guardian1357]

Ah but the poll results speak for themselves.

you look dumb

Look who's talking.

I belive it was you...and it was also you who asked this stupid question....thats 2...

3 strikes and your out buddy...

[cyrenius]

I can only laugh at how retarded is this poll, never crossed my mind to vote

In other words, you're ashamed of your own wanking. Don't worry, it gets easier with age.

I'm not ashamend, it was good when it was, but then I grew up

were you castrated?

What? So where you live is a custom to castrate people when they grow up?