Dating a Racist

[Juan_Bottom]

So my sister is dating a racist, and moving to the Mason-Dixon with him. She thinks it's ok, cauze everyone out here is racist. I want to fight him.
He compared the New Orleans flooding with the Midwest flooding as a proof. He musta said "monkeys" a dozen times. Like I said I wanted to fight him, but my girlfriend picked up on it and snapped me back to my senses.

Advice?



PS, I feel much better now, thank you for all of your concern.

[black elk speaks]

that mason dixon is a fine line is she going to live right on it?

your sister is going to be who she is going to be, and that may be a racist. if you still love her, then you accept her for who she is. you can start fights with her boyfriend, but that will only drive you and your sister apart, because you will most likely be viewed as the antagonist. he must be a puny punk ass, or you wouldn't want to fight him, so you will also look like you are picking on a gimpy racist f*ck. your goal should be to set an example. you will not change anyone's mind by force.

good luck.

[Snorri1234]

Go fight him. It's the only sensible (and funny) way.

[b.k. barunt]

Up there you have a plethora of closet racists. Down here we have flagrant ones. The way i deal with my redneck racist friends is A. Try to reason with them, it works for me a lot if they're younger than me, and very little if they're around my age.
B. If A. fails, i just hit them with sarcastic barbs every time they bring up the subject and make them look foolish in front of innocent bystanders.


Honibaz

[black elk speaks]

Up there you have a plethora of closet racists. Down here we have flagrant ones. The way i deal with my redneck racist friends is A. Try to reason with them, it works for me a lot if they're younger than me, and very little if they're around my age.
B. If A. fails, i just hit them with sarcastic barbs every time they bring up the subject and make them look foolish in front of innocent bystanders.


Honibaz

I thought you said "fragrant" as in,

our racists smell like roses!

[william18]

So my sister is dating a racist, and moving to the Mason-Dixon with him. She thinks it's ok, cauze everyone out here is racist. I want to fight him.
He compared the New Orleans flooding with the Midwest flooding as a proof. He musta said "monkeys" a dozen times. Like I said I wanted to fight him, but my girlfriend picked up on it and snapped me back to my senses.

Advice?



PS, I feel much better now, thank you for all of your concern.

Become an influental person.

Everyone is influental when they have a baseball bat in their hands.

[b.k. barunt]

This is one area where violence absolutely will not work. You can sometimes stop a person from committing racist acts with violence, and stop them from saying racist things in your company, but you will only make them more entrenched in their racist views if you kick the shit out of them. Go figure.


Honibaz

[Ditocoaf]

If I were you, I'd probably end up arguing with him extensively, trying to goad him into a detailed debate... when that inevitably failed, I'd fight him.

Don't do that.

[pimpdave]

Take the passive aggressive approach.

Key the words "racist scum" into his car door.

Leave a pig's head on his front doorstep, with a white hood on it's head. (a real butcher will have one he'll probably just give you, but you'll have to make the hood yourself)

Invite him over for a party where you have a bunch of black friends set to arrive, but make sure he gets there earlier than they do, so that he'll already be relaxed by the time they start arriving. Ideally, he'll be drunk enough to run his mouth off, and they'll be sober enough to respond to it acerbically, rather than violently.

Water balloons filled with urine. And not just any urine, stinky dark yellow dehydrated asparagus urine.

etc.

[nesterdude]

Or you could just let him believe what he wants to believe...and screw your sister LOL

[Frigidus]

Or you could just let him believe what he wants to believe...and screw your sister LOL

That is a strikingly southern solution.

[nesterdude]

ROFL
Wow
what you people get away with
you can say "racist" and it's ok
You can say "sexist" and it's cool
But wow, just lump a whole geographical region into a lump category and that's ok
LOL
How indoctrinated are you son?
Wake up.

[jay_a2j]

You could let him know, politely, that you don't want to hear his racist talk and to please refrain from doing it around you. If that doesn't work, set his sister up with someone of a different race.

[Frigidus]

ROFL
Wow
what you people get away with
you can say "racist" and it's ok
You can say "sexist" and it's cool
But wow, just lump a whole geographical region into a lump category and that's ok
LOL
How indoctrinated are you son?
Wake up.

Sorry, didn't mean to touch on something so sensitive. Nah, not really, it was a joke, sorry if the whole North and South bit hasn't quite smoothed over since the civil war.

[Frigidus]

ROFL
Wow
what you people get away with
you can say "racist" and it's ok
You can say "sexist" and it's cool
But wow, just lump a whole geographical region into a lump category and that's ok
LOL
How indoctrinated are you son?
Wake up.

Sorry, didn't mean to touch on something so sensitive. Nah, not really, it was a joke, sorry if the whole North and South bit hasn't quite smoothed over since the civil war.

Alternative response:
What do you mean, "you people"?

[jonesthecurl]

Juan - hi, man!
good to hear from you. [checks date of post to ensure someone hasn't revived a dead thread -people have been fooled like that before]

No, don't fight him. As bk said, that won't change his mind.

Sometimes the best thing you can do is be an example. Without knowing more about the case, I don't know what this would mean in this instance - play good music by "monkeys", lend him a good book by someone you don't happen to mention is a "monkey" until afterwards, refuse to laugh at the lame jokes that undoubtably accompany his attitude, I don't know what else.

Date a "monkey" yourself, he'll nsult you to your sister's face when your not there.

I'm sure too that if he's that much of a git on this subject, his attitudes on various other subjects will be dreadful too.

Arrange some way to let your sister discover that he consider women to be mere household servants that provide sex on demand, whose opinons aren't worth listening to - and that it's OK for a guy to screw around but not a girl.

Ask him if he's ever screwed any "monkeys", and how much he paid. I'm sure that an apparent mellowing towards him, a few beers, a willingness to listen and judicious use of a recording device would get you all the evidence you need.

I hope your sister sees that he's a substandard example of the human race and should not get to reproduce, thus helping to prove the theory of evolution.

Give her up as lost cause if she can't see it?

(This last might sound extreme, but if the attitude really doesn't bother her, she may share it, or come to share it. How close can you actually be to her then? )

But most of all, good to see your name again.

[black elk speaks]

jones, I think that you are assuming a lot there. Just because the guy is a racist doesn't mean that he is a womanizer. true, it may be likely that he is, but, unless i missed something back there, i don't think it was exposed that the sister's boyfriend is bad to her.

[jonesthecurl]

True, I make this assumption without any direct evidence.

But in my personal experience it has been true without exception. (then again I'm not from around here, or even from where Juan is from).

Then again, to widen my suggestion, I suspect that to tape a personal conversation with the boyfriend in which Juan sounded him out on a range of subjects, while encouraging him to expand on his opinions would probably provide something or another that'd turn her off.

[strike wolf]

First. It's people like him who give the South a bad name. Don't fight him just pulverize him with intellectual debate.

Second. It's good to see you back Juan.

[Neoteny]

I believe a curb-stomping is the appropriate response.

[TheProwler]

So my sister is dating a racist, and moving to the Mason-Dixon with him. She thinks it's ok, cauze everyone out here is racist. I want to fight him.
He compared the New Orleans flooding with the Midwest flooding as a proof. He musta said "monkeys" a dozen times. Like I said I wanted to fight him, but my girlfriend picked up on it and snapped me back to my senses.

Advice?

Let your sister make her own choices. You must have expressed your concern and she responded.

You can't choose family, and you really can't choose who your family dates.




But I'd stick big black dildo up his ass just for a laugh.

[The1exile]

You can't choose family, and you really can't choose who your family dates.

But you can damn well try.

[Juan_Bottom]

Let your sister make her own choices. You must have expressed your concern and she responded.

You can't choose family, and you really can't choose who your family dates.

That's the thing. Maybe everyone out here in America's Heartland is a closet racist, but we still have our rules. Like having the older brothers approval. And he doesn't.

Allow me to clear some things up. First, he is a bigger guy than me. I still think I can take him though, so long as he doesn't pull his pocketknife.
?
Second, yes, I did express my concerns, and she did respond. But she is settling you see, and settling for a racist. Look below for Ironic, and frustrating details.

Third, his family is originally from Tennesse, but he has lived here for all his life. He just wants to go to school down there.

Finally, I did whoop him in an arguement about just this, at a bonfire. I was pretty hot headed when he started spouting out this dribble. So I shot him down. 10 drunkards came to his defense, and I learned a little something about my community right there. A few people cannot be my friend anymore.* I felt trapped, and angry, and I was ready to fight right there(fight or flight). My girlfriend(white, and of 5 years Jonesthecurl, so no dating other girls!) picked up on it real quick, distracted me, and took me home. My mother was there, and she just put her head down. I'm pretty abandoned in this. In fact, I'm feeling pretty lonely in this whole ordeal. But it is my job to protect my sister, no?

I don't know if he is an all-around jerk. From what I've seen of him, he seems like a cut-out of the average guy. But I can't lend him a book, he's no reader. And so far, he has been at least, decent to her. I don't really know the inner workings of their relationship though, ya know?

Date a "monkey" yourself, he'll nsult you to your sister's face when your not there.

This is where the Irony hits in. Although he only talked about blacks, is any racist only racist against one group? My family is all part Chippewa! My Grandma left the reservation to marry my Grandpa. While my appearance for all practical purposes is white, my sister has darker skin!
*Those people who can't be my friend anymore sad that I am "ok mentally because my grandpa was white." And one of the drunkards who came to his defense was my mother's new boyfriend. But like I said, she just put her head down. Lucky for her she missed the part where folks explain why I am "ok."

I'm pretty upset about all of this, and don't really know what to do. I'm not like my mother, I always hold my head up. I just know that I'm going to fight him, it feels insulting to my pride just to be around him, and worse---to know that he's gotten my sister to settle. Is it like this everywhere?

[Dancing Mustard]

You could let him know, politely, that you don't want to hear his racist talk and to please refrain from doing it around you. If that doesn't work, set his sister up with someone of a different race.

I, I... I think I, well, um... kind of agree with Jay.

That's a really brilliant idea. Do it.

[Juan_Bottom]

Oh yeah, sorry forgot to reply to that. He's an only child.

I dunno about asking him "politely," I'm in the minority appearantly.