White dog poo (I need a recipe)

[Pedronicus]

When i was a kid (before dog owners picked up dog poo with a plastic bag and stuck it in a bin) you would see the odd dog turd that was white. I don't know how this white poo came to be, but I'm going to try and recreate white poo by eating foodstuffs that are white.

So far my shopping list is this:
Milk
white bread (Crusts removed)
cauliflower
sugar
rice
Flour
potatoes
salt
Coconut
Mayonnaise
Cream cheese
Marshmallows
Cod
egg whites
chicken breast (skinless)
lychee's
garlic


I need more ingredients, then i need a recipe or two.
Please help

[ParadiceCity9]

White bread isn't actually white!!!

[Genghis Khant]

Dulux white emulsion

[Skittles!]

Salt.

[heavycola]

pedigree chum, obv.

ped, if this doesn't net you a PHD then the scientific establishment has some serious questiosn to answer.

[Skittles!]

Coconut!

Also, have you ever considered that the poo was just old? Cause, poo goes white if it's a few days old or something.

[heavycola]

http://www.thenakedscientists.com/forum ... ?topic=182

basically you need to keep it dry and untouched somewhere safe for few months, ie. not a pavement. Your kitchen windowsill, perhap, or the airing cupboard.

[legendkiller717]

poo goes white if you have a high calcium intake (dogs that eat bones are the ones that leave them), and then the calcium needs to emulsify and harden under heat and dry, turning the high calcium deposits white

[Frigidus]

poo goes white if you have a high calcium intake (dogs that eat bones are the ones that leave them), and then the calcium needs to emulsify and harden under heat and dry, turning the high calcium deposits white

So eat a skeleton and then shit on your neighbor's driveway. If he complains, explain that it's for science.

[jonesthecurl]

If it's for science, why not crap in his fridge?

[Gypsys Kiss]

If it's for science, why not crap in his fridge?

Needs heat, so it would have to be his oven.

[Frigidus]

If it's for science, why not crap in his fridge?

Needs heat, so it would have to be his oven.

Also, defecating in public would help get you that mad scientist vibe.

[Pedronicus]

Well now that we have established that;
i need to dump in my neighbours oven and explain to him it's all in the name of science.

I now need a recipe using the list of ingredients on the OP.

[Juan_Bottom]

Sour Cream!
Cottage Cheese!
50 other kinds of cheese!
Potatos!
Lobster!
Crab(I'm told)!
5000000000000000000 kinds of Fish!
Cat meat(I'm told)!

[jonesthecurl]

Well, the thing that makes normal poo brown is dead red blood cells, so get a huge infection in your guts, and get those white cells working overtime - maybe that will help.

Then your dump in the neighbour's oven can be infectious too.

On the other hand, the oven might be a little annoying for them. If they have hot air heating, remove one of the panels and put your dump in there. Sure, it might spread the pong about a bit more, but they'll still be able to eat.

[DAZMCFC]

Well, the thing that makes normal poo brown is dead red blood cells, so get a huge infection in your guts, and get those white cells working overtime - maybe that will help.

Then your dump in the neighbour's oven can be infectious too.

On the other hand, the oven might be a little annoying for them. If they have hot air heating, remove one of the panels and put your dump in there. Sure, it might spread the pong about a bit more, but they'll still be able to eat.

stick it down the back of a radiator in his house.


now many moons ago, i remember drinking large quatities of Blue Lagoons(cocktail) whilst on holiday and that turned my shit green. so maybe a white liquer will do the trick in your quest forthe white shit.

[legendkiller717]

you know, you could avoid all this and just find some white dog poo

[jonesthecurl]

Well, the thing that makes normal poo brown is dead red blood cells, so get a huge infection in your guts, and get those white cells working overtime - maybe that will help.

Then your dump in the neighbour's oven can be infectious too.

On the other hand, the oven might be a little annoying for them. If they have hot air heating, remove one of the panels and put your dump in there. Sure, it might spread the pong about a bit more, but they'll still be able to eat.

stick it down the back of a radiator in his house.


now many moons ago, i remember drinking large quatities of Blue Lagoons(cocktail) whilst on holiday and that turned my shit green. so maybe a white liquer will do the trick in your quest forthe white shit.

I've seen different versions of Blue Lagoon - the cocktail we used to call this was champagne + Blue Curacao. I think that was all that was in there.

[Neoteny]

I love the smell of science.

[Frigidus]

I love the smell of science.

I dunno, does science smell like congealing shit?

[jonesthecurl]

It was the only smell we ever got out of our Xmas chemistry sets when I was a kid...

[Pedronicus]

I love the smell of science.

I dunno, does science smell like congealing shit?

It does when the experiment involves making white poo.

[Neoteny]

Also, anything involving lactic acid bacteria or E. coli.

[Pedronicus]

[Frigidus]

Gentlemen, we have done it. We have created...white poop. Soon the world will know the true genius of The Not Yet Banned!