Fruitcake wrote:Keep going, don't go the way of the hand wringers. I am amazed to be even reading this thread by you Mr C.
I'd happily admit that when I first started playing I held the striper rank not with pride, but with disgust. I absolutely hated that striper rank, for it suggested a lack of ability at a game I
knew I was very, very good at before I had even completed my first game on CC. From that point on I felt the need to prove I was at the top of what I do on CC.
But how does one define the 'top?' Maybe it is Medefe at around 2,700? Ok, give me a few months and I'll get there. But then what? Off to Brig. no doubt. Give me six months then. But then what? Then I'd have to find the highest ranked sequential player on the scoreboard (probably you Fc at least for no cards) and then chase him down for god knows how long. But what would be
the point of that?
Why do we push so obsessively? I believe it is because of a desire to prove our ascendency over our competitors. That's what makes us so competitive in games and what pushes us up the scoreboard. But even if I did push to within a couple of hundred points of you Fc, would it really make you believe I am better player than you currently now think I am? Or just a player with more mental grit?
I admit that I pushed so hard because of a desire for validation, a need for others to see me as I see myself. But I think I've reached a point whereby any player on CC who's played against me (or checks my record) must know I'm very good at this game. I don't believe I'd get that much more validation from spending the next twelve months driving myself into the top 100.
So I've been weighing fun against validation all this time. When I was a striper, validation won. Also when I was a lieutenant, a captain and even a major validation won. But now I feel validated and am (at least for a good long while) bowing out of the race.
Confessions of a (reformed) CC rank addict