
  This got a much larger response than I expected!  Well time to start answering! 
safariguy5 wrote:How many people did the KGB kill?
If we are counting the KGB since it was called the KGB and not its various predecessors, so from Krushchev onwards I would give an educated guess of in the mid to low thousands .  Post Stalin the Soviets were far more likely to simply exile or imprison dissidents. 
If we are counting the KGB's predecessors (The Checka, NKVD and NKGB) The number is astronomically high probably in the order of 30-40 million (this number depending on which historian you consult could either be a vast overestimate or even an underestimate).  It is very difficult to know with any real degree of certainty as many of the relevant documents are unsurprisingly top secret and the early Soviet Union wasn't very meticulous in its record keeping. 
Due to not knowing you very well I can't give a very accurate guess of how you would fit in Stalinist Russia, but your interest in the KGB leads me to beleive you would likely be in the state security apparatus. A very prestigious but dangerous position, you know exactly what the State is up to! Chance of survival till Khrushchev: very low 
Army of GOD wrote:What is my favorite Tchaikovsky piece?
If you answer incorrectly, I demand this thread be locked.
I know very little about Tchaikovsky, So I will say the one which has all the classical instruments in it. 
AOG; I see you as an average citizen normally this is the safest position to be in due to your cog like insignificance to the soviet scheme of things. However you joking and humorous manner would likely get you reported and then disappeared. Chance of survival till Khrushchev: low
tzor wrote:OK if you want a question ... I have a question.
What is the most popular brand of Vodka in Russia and where does it come from.
What is your most favorite brand for that matter ...
This is a tough question, I would guess the most popular brand is "moskivoskaya" or "Stolichnaya"   there is allot of competition in the Vodka market so its hard to say if one is bigger than the others.
My favorite Vodka is "Russkii Standard" 
Tzor; You enjoy a good debate and have a general dislike of big government; therefore  I suspect your most likely position within Stalinist Russia would be a starving Ukrainian anarchist. Chance of survival till Khrushchev: nearing 0. 
natty_dread wrote:How do you win at russian roulette?
Inklosed gave a pretty good answer.  However Russian roulette is played with a revolver with only one round chambered. The players spin the chamber point the gun at their head and pull the trigger, if the round goes off they lose everybody else wins. Alternatively the one who shoots themselves wins and everybody else loses for being stuck in Soviet Russia longer. 
Natty_Dread;  I picture you as a regular average joe, this means you would have quite likely been conscripted and thrown into the firestorm of the western front. Chance of survival till Khrushchev: you're probably already dead. 
angola wrote:Are Russians sad they no longer control the Eastern Bloc?
Russian's are much more likely to be sad about the loss of the Soviet Union rather than the Eastern bloc.There is a disappointment in certain circles at the loss of Russian influence in the world and Russia's reduced global stature, the loss of the Eastern bloc is a part of that. This is more common among older Russians who can remember the soviet union the younger generation doesn't really care all that much. 
Angola: I don't know much about you so I will assume you will be an average citizen who engages in the  daily toil for the glory of the motherland. Chance of survival till Khrushchev: Not bad
natty_dread wrote:Why did the Russians suck so badly at the winter war?
There are allot of reasons. Some of the big ones; The fins were much better prepared, The war mattered allot more to the fins, The purge of red army officers had recently cleared out most of the professional officers in the Red Army leaving political hacks, Soviet soldiers were badly equipped for winter fighting (no skis, little winter camouflage, supply problems), Soviet troops were badly trained, the Soviets had poor mission planing and the soviets had very bad moral. 
Once they started getting too embarrassed they found some more professional officers who did the smart thing and encircled the finish defense line, they also had much better planning by the end of the war. 
See your other question for how well you would do in Stalinist Russia. 
jefjef wrote:How do most Russians really view Americans?
Where are the missing Russian nukes?
I haven't met any Russians who were all that unfriendly towards individual Americans,though there is quite a bit of hostility towards American foreign policy and government. Where I have heard of Russians being unfriendly towards Americans its in the context of American policy. Again the younger generation is much more likely to be friendly/ambivalent towards Americans. 
As far as I know all the Russian nukes have been tracked down with the help of American, British and Canadian agencies. What is less certain is that they have tracked down all of their nuclear material, even less certain are all the Chemical and biological weapons the Soviets had stockpiled. Where would missing things have gone? Nearly impossible to tell, whoever would want to buy them most likely. 
Fortunately many of the people working in these storage facilities were highly educated scientists, had a great amount of loyalty to the Soviet union and a high degree of social responsibility so most  were very honorable people and were unlikely to sell such dangerous things.  
JefJef; I see you as a Soviet military officer, the professional variety. So depending on whether you were promoted during the war or as a result of the revolutionary  war your chances of survival can vary quite a bit. Chance of survival till Khrushchev: moderately low- very low
Metsfanmax wrote:Better yet, in Soviet Russia, does government ask anything about you?
Depending on your position and prominence in Soviet society they either ask allot of questions about you or not care about you at all. 
MetsFanmax; I see you as an average Soviet citizen; Chance of survival till Khrushchev: moderately good 
muy_thaiguy wrote:Are the "In Soviet Russia" jokes all true?
Unfortunately no. The most accurate one I've heard is "In soviet Russia party finds you!" 
Muy_Thaiguy; Your martial prowess would be very highly prized in the NKVD or state athletics; If you were in the NKVD your chances are pretty bad is you were a state sponsored athlete who did not talk about politics pretty good! so Chance of survival till Khrushchev: very low- pretty good.  
Queen_Herpes wrote:Who is more macho?
a. Lenin
b. Karl Marx (ok, he isn't russian)
c. Stalin (At this point, he isn't Russian anymore since Georgia is its own nation, right?)
d. Trotsky
e. Tschaikovsky
Please be prepared to let me know if any of my choices are from the Ukraine.
I would say Trotsky is the most Macho of the people you list there. Purely because he was instrumental in turning the Revolutionary army into a fighting force that could actually win. 
As to your comment on Stalin, he was indeed Georgian but this would have been acknowledged even in the Soviet Union due to the various Socialist republics being autonomous ethnic units united in Socialist fraternity.  
You are a woman so this greatly increases your chances of survival since you wouldn't be subject to the draft,You would probably be working in a factory somewhere which doesn't hurt however you are also pretty outspoken this greatly increases your chances of being reported.  Your chances of survival until Khrushchev; moderate 
saxitoxin wrote:PWN, I'm actually quite legitimately interested in what role the reformed Cossack hosts are playing in the Federation armed forces? As I don't read Russian I'm limited to western sources which make vague references that the Hosts are being reorganized and receiving arms and munitions from the Federation.
I only know much of this as I recall seeing a brief news item 2-3 years ago that some Cossack battle regalia was being returned to Russia from the United States ... that the joint American-Czechoslovak pro-Tsarist intervention forces during the October Revolution had been given it by the Cossacks to move out of the country for safekeeping. 
Do you have information or can you illuminate? Even if you don't have this information off the top of your head I would still be keen to know more if you can find out. You, verily, may be the only non-Russian language source for this information.
 Unfortunately my Russian is still pretty limited and I can't read at the level of History books or documents yet, So I'm afraid I can't give you a very good answer.  I'll tell you what I know/think though. 
Most of the Cossacks are actually in Ukraine  so I imagine they play a significant role in the Ukrainian military considering their historic martial background. The cossacks were actually used in the Soviet military as well despite them being some of the fiercest opponents of the Bolsheviks. Though their use in the Soviet military was more as specific ethnic regiments rather than the way they were used in the Imperial period. 
I believe the Cossack are treated as guards units within the Russian forces. If I am correct this would mean they are treated as elite units within the Russian army. At most they might make up a Regiment however whatever their position it would certainly be within the standard military Hierarchy 
 it may also interest you to know that in the south they are seen as a way to combat  Muslim influences and as a result the Russian government has given Cossacks administrative and policing powers. 
Saxi; I see you as 1 of two things but can't  be totally sure.  You would either be a fairly high ranking party official or a fairly high ranking bureaucrat, both come with their perks and dangers  with the party official postilion being significantly more dangerous it would depend on how good you are at party politics I suspect good.  Chances of survival till Khrushchev; moderately good
the.killing.44 wrote:Stalin's pet name for his right testicle?
Engels.
The.Killing.44; For some reason I  see you as a Ukrainian peasant, therefore you are a great risk of either starving to death or being conscripted as cannon fodder.Chances of surviving till Khrushchev;pretty low. 
mviola wrote:How many square miles does russia occupy?
I'll think of another since I just can't right now
A whole lot, about a 7th of the earths surface, I can't tell you exactly how many without cheating. 
Mviola; You would have been a Siberian peasant, you might not have even heard the Tsar abdicated the throne, there is a good chance you would be conscripted anyways so chances of survival till Khrushchev: moderate.  
naxus wrote:On what day and how old was Lenin when he died?
Unfortunately I am not an encyclopedia so I can't say for sure.  I think he was in his 50's though. 
Naxus; You would have been a faceless bureaucrat obsessed with the minute errors in paper work, also the most powerful force in Russia. chances of survival until Khrushchev: good.