How Do You Tell Your Wife She's Too Fat?

[Woodruff]

surely you have already identified the problem? these people make a lot of effort to lose weight, then as soon as they have lost weight they go back to their bad habits from before and the weight goes back.

it's not difficult to be thin. just don't sprinkle sugar on every bowl of rice because you think it's boring without.

But it IS boring without.

[yang guize]

well there is your problem

[PLAYER57832]

The percentage of people who lose more than about 10 pounds and keep it off is 0. 0 percent.

Don't bother.

My wife lost 82 pounds via WeightWatchers four years ago. She's still within 3 pounds of that lost weight point.

Congratulate, congratulate, congratulate her on meeting her goals, being healthy!! (though I am sure you already do)

[KoolBak]

So....when my fat wife got to the point that I had to say something, I very politely suggested she walk 3 miles in the morning and 3 miles at night for some exercise.....you know what? After a week, that fatty was 42 miles away!

BA DA BUM

[Woodruff]

So....when my fat wife got to the point that I had to say something, I very politely suggested she walk 3 miles in the morning and 3 miles at night for some exercise.....you know what? After a week, that fatty was 42 miles away!

<laughing>

[Phatscotty]

I like the doctor one! Tell her doctor to give her "the talk" and scare the shit out of her.

"Threaten diabetes! I don't care man! Tell her you're gonna cut off her toes or something...anything! I'm countin on you doc!"

[tkr4lf]

At that point, the 34 patients who remained stopped dieting and began working to maintain the new lower weight. Nutritionists counseled them in person and by phone, promoting regular exercise and urging them to eat more vegetables and less fat. But despite the effort, they slowly began to put on weight. After a year, the patients already had regained an average of 11 of the pounds they struggled so hard to lose. They also reported feeling far more hungry and preoccupied with food than before they lost the weight.

While researchers have known for decades that the body undergoes various metabolic and hormonal changes while it’s losing weight, the Australian team detected something new. A full year after significant weight loss, these men and women remained in what could be described as a biologically altered state. Their still-plump bodies were acting as if they were starving and were working overtime to regain the pounds they lost. For instance, a gastric hormone called ghrelin, often dubbed the “hunger hormone,” was about 20 percent higher than at the start of the study. Another hormone associated with suppressing hunger, peptide YY, was also abnormally low. Levels of leptin, a hormone that suppresses hunger and increases metabolism, also remained lower than expected. A cocktail of other hormones associated with hunger and metabolism all remained significantly changed compared to pre-dieting levels. It was almost as if weight loss had put their bodies into a unique metabolic state, a sort of post-dieting syndrome that set them apart from people who hadn’t tried to lose weight in the first place.

The percentage of people who lose more than about 10 pounds and keep it off is 0. 0 percent.

Don't bother.

My wife lost 82 pounds via WeightWatchers four years ago. She's still within 3 pounds of that lost weight point.

Of course people do lose weight and keep it off for a while, but eventually virtually everybody gains most of it back. The science of weight loss isn't very inspiring. Your wife's body at her current weight is not like other people who are normally at that weight. Basically, at a lower weight than your normal, your body thinks it's starving, and will always think it's starving at that weight.

There is a very tiny minority of people who manage to keep the weight off, but only through constant vigilance about their diet and enormous willpower. That minority is so tiny that they're statistically insignificant.

The only real exception is that you can lose recently gained weight. That's because your body still thinks your previous weight is the "normal". They haven't done studies on how long a time it takes for your body to establish a new normal, but it's probably over a year.

http://fatfu.wordpress.com/2008/01/24/weight-watchers/
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/01/01/magaz ... wanted=all

This is the exact same thing I posted in the "Fattism" thread, except it came from a Cracked article. In that thread, it got argued and belittled to death. In this thread it's basically accepted as fact. Weird...

[heavycola]

This is weird - I just came from another forum, and there's someone posting as MrsPhatScotty who started a thread called 'How can i tell my husband his dick is too small?' Could be a coincidence. I must have lost the link.

If you are determined to alter your life partner's vital statistics, then the only proven way to reduce appetite and keep weight off is by taking control of one's life and starting a course of regular methamphetamine ingestion.

Here:


See on the left, that double chin, the extra weight carried around the jawline and below the ears?
Just three years of smoking crystal and bingo! No more double chin, a sharply defined jawline and the cheekbones of a supermodel. This lady also lightened her hair, which really brings out her eye colour and enhances her new shape. Hello boys!

[KoolBak]

Also, note the well-formed jaw muscles from the constant teeth-grinding and uncontrollable, hyperactive mouth / jaw gyrations. Also, I bet her teeth are brilliant white and breath is minty fresh! Good call on the diet, although personally I think the all cocaine diet is more effective with fewer negative side effects....it's a toss up really.

[PLAYER57832]

First, yes, I laughed too.

However, in amongst the humor is the truest answer. If you want your wife to notice her weight, to be more healthy overall, then concentrate on YOUR health, YOUR weight, YOUR appearance and attidue overall.

Seriously, that is the best approach and the only one that will truly work.

[PLAYER57832]

Or, an old story, but still worth reading:

JOHNNY LINGO'S 8-COW WIFE
By Patricia McGerr

When I sailed to Kiniwata, an island in the Pacific, I took along a notebook. After I got back it was filled with descriptions of flora and fauna, native customs and costume. But the only note that still interests me is the one that says: "Johnny Lingo gave eight cows to Sarita’s father." And I don’t need to have it in writing. I’m reminded of it every time I see a woman belittling her husband or a wife withering under her husband’s scorn. I want to say to them, "You should know why Johnny Lingo paid eight cows for his wife."

Johnny Lingo wasn’t exactly his name. But that’s what Shenkin, the manager of the guest house on Kiniwata, called him. Shenkin was from Chicago and had a habit of Americanizing the names of the islanders. But Johnny was mentioned by many people in many connections. If I wanted to spend a few days on the neighboring island of Nurabandi, Johnny Lingo would put me up. If I wanted to fish he could show me where the biting was best. If it was pearls I sought, he would bring the best buys. The people of Kiniwata all spoke highly of Johnny Lingo. Yet when they spoke they smiled, and the smiles were slightly mocking.

"Get Johnny Lingo to help you find what you want and let him do the bargaining," advised Shenkin. "Johnny knows how to make a deal." "Johnny Lingo! A boy seated nearby hooted the name and rocked with laughter. "What goes on?" I demanded. "everybody tells me to get in touch with Johnny Lingo and then breaks up. Let me in on the joke." "Oh, the people like to laugh," Shenkin said, shruggingly. "Johnny's the brightest, the strongest young man in the islands, And for his age, the richest." "But if he’s all you say, what is there to laugh about?" "Only one thing. Five months ago, at fall festival, Johnny came to Kiniwata and found himself a wife. He paid her father eight cows!

I knew enough about island customs to be impressed. Two or three cows would buy a fair-to-middling wife, four or five a highly satisfactory one. "Good Lord!" I said, "Eight cows! She must have beauty that takes your breath away." "She’s not ugly," he conceded, and smiled a little. "But the kindest could only call Sarita plain.

Sam Karoo, her father, was afraid she’d be left on his hands." "But then he got eight cows for her? Isn’t that extraordinary?" "Never been paid before." "Yet you call Johnny’s wife plain?" "I said it would be kindness to call her plain. She was skinny. She walked with her shoulders hunched and her head ducked. She was scared of her own shadow." "Well," I said, "I guess there’s just no accounting for love." "True enough," agreed the man. "And that’s why the villagers grin when they talk about Johnny. They get special satisfaction from the fact that the sharpest trader in the islands was bested by dull old Sam Karoo."

"But how?" "No one knows and everyone wonders. All the cousins were urging Sam to ask for three cows and hold out for two until he was sure Johnny’d pay only one. Then Johnny came to Sam Karoo and said, ‘Father of Sarita, I offer eight cows for your daughter.’" "Eight cows," I murmured. "I’d like to meet this Johnny Lingo." "And I wanted fish. I wanted pearls. So the next afternoon I beached my boat at Nurabandi. And I noticed as I asked directions to Johnny’s house that his name brought no sly smile to the lips of his fellow Nurabandians. And when I met the slim, serious young man, when he welcomed me with grace to his home, I was glad that from his own people he had respect unmingled with mockery. We sat in his house and talked. Then he asked, "You come here from Kiniwata?" "Yes." "They speak of me on that island?" "They say there’s nothing I might want they you can’t help me get." He smiled gently. "My wife is from Kiniwata." "Yes, I know." "They speak of her?" "A little." "What do they say?" "Why, just..." The question caught me off balance. "They told me you were married at festival time." "Nothing more?" The curve of his eyebrows told me he knew there had to be more. They also say the marriage settlement was eight cows." I paused. "They wonder why." "They ask that?" His eyes lightened with pleasure. "Everyone in Kiniwata knows about the eight cows?" I nodded. "And in Nurabandi everyone knows it too." His chest expanded with satisfaction. "Always and forever, when they speak of marriage settlements, it will be remembered that Johnny Lingo paid eight cows for Sarita." So that’s the answer, I thought: vanity.

And then I saw her. I watched her enter the room to place flowers on the table. She stood still a moment to smile at the young man beside me. Then she went swiftly out again. She was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. The lift of her shoulders, the tilt of her chin the sparkle of her eyes all spelled a pride to which no one could deny her the right. I turned back to Johnny Lingo and found him looking at me. "You admire her?" he murmured. "She...she’s glorious. But she’s not Sarita from Kiniwata," I said.

"There’s only one Sarita. Perhaps she does not look the way they say she looked in Kiniwata." "She doesn’t. I heard she was homely. They all make fun of you because you let yourself be cheated by Sam Karoo." "You think eight cows were too many?" A smile slid over his lips. "No. But how can she be so different?" "Do you ever think," he asked, "what it must mean to a woman to know that her husband has settled on the lowest price for which she can be bought? And then later, when the women talk, they boast of what their husbands paid for them. One says four cows, another maybe six. How does she feel, the woman who was sold for one or two?" This could not happen to my Sarita."

"Then you did this just to make your wife happy?" "I wanted Sarita to be happy, yes. But I wanted more than that. You say she is different This is true. Many things can change a woman. Things that happen inside, things that happen outside. But the thing that matters most is what she thinks about herself. In Kiniwata, Sarita believed she was worth nothing. Now she knows she is worth more than any other woman in the islands." "Then you wanted -" "I wanted to marry Sarita. I loved her and no other woman." "But —" I was close to understanding. "But," he finished softly, "I wanted an eight-cow wife."

[jonesthecurl]

My first wife was a cow. I wouldn't want eight of her.

[Woodruff]

First, yes, I laughed too.

However, in amongst the humor is the truest answer. If you want your wife to notice her weight, to be more healthy overall, then concentrate on YOUR health, YOUR weight, YOUR appearance and attidue overall.

Seriously, that is the best approach and the only one that will truly work.

Again, I must disagree strongly. I did none of that. I'm not particularly concerned with my own health (I don't TRY to be unhealthy, but I don't particularly try to be healthy either).

One day, she asked me if I considered her overweight. I told her that I did consider her overweight, but that I loved her very deeply and it didn't matter to me that she was overweight. All that mattered was that she was happy with who she was. Not too long after that, she decided to try WeightWatchers. Obviously, she was already thinking about it before she ever asked me.

[kentington]

First, yes, I laughed too.

However, in amongst the humor is the truest answer. If you want your wife to notice her weight, to be more healthy overall, then concentrate on YOUR health, YOUR weight, YOUR appearance and attidue overall.

Seriously, that is the best approach and the only one that will truly work.

Again, I must disagree strongly. I did none of that. I'm not particularly concerned with my own health (I don't TRY to be unhealthy, but I don't particularly try to be healthy either).

One day, she asked me if I considered her overweight. I told her that I did consider her overweight, but that I loved her very deeply and it didn't matter to me that she was overweight. All that mattered was that she was happy with who she was. Not too long after that, she decided to try WeightWatchers. Obviously, she was already thinking about it before she ever asked me.

This happened when my wife was preggers. She asked me if I thought she had gained too much weight. I told her she was bigger than she was with the other kids, but it didn't matter to me. And it truthfully didn't matter to me. She lost all the weight and is now back to her original size. It's great for her because now she is more comfortable with herself. But if she gained some weight it wouldn't bother me either.

[BigBallinStalin]

My first wife was a cow. I wouldn't want eight of her.

Did she complement her features with a shrill voice?

[jonesthecurl]

My first wife was a cow. I wouldn't want eight of her.

Did she complement her features with a shrill voice?

Sometimes.
At others she was the Galactic Empress of the stony silence. It could go on for days, which would have been great if it hadn't been combined with The Look.

[L M S]

You do not.