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If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby BigBallinStalin on Tue Aug 14, 2012 5:40 pm

betiko wrote:it is scientifically proven that it's impossible to travel back in time; you can only theoretically travel into the future.

Have you ever seen a guy from the future? me neither. I haven't seen a guy from the past either because we haven't created a space shuttle for it yet.

and regarding the world 2000 years ago: do you not know how mathematically and astronomically advanced they were already back then??

I think this question would be much more interesting with cavemen. you could be quite a mighty god to them. well actually, why even ask ourselves this question, this is possible to do today... there are some tribes in papua new guinea, amazon ect that don't even know what rice is.


Stop!

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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby Symmetry on Tue Aug 14, 2012 5:43 pm

BigBallinStalin wrote:
crispybits wrote:Naah just teach them a few basic boatbuilding techniques and how to make effective marine weaponry, and tell them that the death of their culture will come in boats from the east and they should continue to make boatbuilding / marine weaponry advances and patrol the shoreline and sink anyone that tries to sail in too close.


Sounds easy.

Um, how does one build a frigate/man-of-war? And won't we need the relevant industries? Then there's military doctrine to be learned, transmitted, then practiced...

And then we'd have to somehow change the way they value life (or production and consumption/investment). Not an easy feat.


It'd be as if you travelled back to 19th Century Iraq and tried to introduce democracy without having people who knew the language, or the culture, and just expected technology to do everything for you.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby crispybits on Tue Aug 14, 2012 5:50 pm

Why are people actually taking that post seriously? I mean I might aswell have said I'd teach them how to deploy nuclear weapons...
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby Symmetry on Tue Aug 14, 2012 5:54 pm

crispybits wrote:Why are people actually taking that post seriously? I mean I might aswell have said I'd teach them how to deploy nuclear weapons...


I'm not sure people are taking it as seriously as you might think.
the world is in greater peril from those who tolerate or encourage evil than from those who actually commit it- Albert Einstein
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby BigBallinStalin on Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:33 pm

crispybits wrote:Why are people actually taking that post seriously? I mean I might aswell have said I'd teach them how to deploy nuclear weapons...


Now that's clearly absurd.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby crispybits on Tue Aug 14, 2012 8:07 pm

Yeah we won't go nuclear, I might teach them to build and fly F-14s tho... ;)
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby InkL0sed on Tue Aug 14, 2012 8:12 pm

If I traveled to the past, I'd teach them to worship my penis.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby nietzsche on Tue Aug 14, 2012 8:41 pm

InkL0sed wrote:If I traveled to the past, I'd teach them to worship my penis.


Of all the responses, this is the most impossible. Even crispybits' idea of splitting the atom with 12 A.D tools seems more plausible.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby Crazyirishman on Tue Aug 14, 2012 8:51 pm

zimmah wrote:
thechuck51 wrote:
MegaProphet wrote:Where on earth are we landing ~2000 years ago? It makes a difference in what knowledge can be shared

thats a good point. I guess if you have the ability to choose "when" you can probably choose "where" so i think its up to you.


in that case i'd go to the americas and prepare the natives to defend against an invasion in the far future. that would be pretty hilarious and mess up the whole history of the world too.


Hey! I already chose that option. you have to give them guns and convince them to kill white people as soon as they see them if you want to f*ck everything up.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby Army of GOD on Tue Aug 14, 2012 8:57 pm

nietzsche wrote:
InkL0sed wrote:If I traveled to the past, I'd teach them to worship my penis.


Of all the responses, this is the most impossible. Even crispybits' idea of splitting the atom with 12 A.D tools seems more plausible.


When I was younger and I first learned what fission was, I thought a very sharp nail swung into a hard surface by a very strong person could, potentially, cause a nuclear explosion.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby thegreekdog on Tue Aug 14, 2012 9:10 pm

Army of GOD wrote:
nietzsche wrote:
InkL0sed wrote:If I traveled to the past, I'd teach them to worship my penis.


Of all the responses, this is the most impossible. Even crispybits' idea of splitting the atom with 12 A.D tools seems more plausible.


When I was younger and I first learned what fission was, I thought a very sharp nail swung into a hard surface by a very strong person could, potentially, cause a nuclear explosion.


Was that yesterday AOG? You can tell us. We won't judge.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby zimmah on Wed Aug 15, 2012 5:00 pm

BigBallinStalin wrote:
crispybits wrote:Naah just teach them a few basic boatbuilding techniques and how to make effective marine weaponry, and tell them that the death of their culture will come in boats from the east and they should continue to make boatbuilding / marine weaponry advances and patrol the shoreline and sink anyone that tries to sail in too close.


Sounds easy.

Um, how does one build a frigate/man-of-war? And won't we need the relevant industries? Then there's military doctrine to be learned, transmitted, then practiced...

And then we'd have to somehow change the way they value life (or production and consumption/investment). Not an easy feat.


cannons are the most important thing, they'd have plenty of time to fill the entire shoreline with huge cannons so that ships won't even be able to come close.

in fact, using dutch polders they could theoretically create artificial islands in front of the shore and mount huge cannons on there and whoever comes close will be forced to retreat.

also, it's not like it's that hard to make a wooden ship if you backwards-engineer it. in fact, maybe a catamaran would even outclass the 17th and 18th century ships near the shores, (they are easy to build, and fast, stable and agile, not to forget it can actually maneuver in shallow waters, unlike bigger ships) they may not be very useful for intercontinental journeys though, because the storage room for food and other needs would be too small.

if you really want to get nasty, you could even take some very basic knowledge to create biological weapons like anthrax (or any lethal bacteria really), if you're just careful enough not to get killed by it yourself, but with our superior knowledge on personal hygiene, we should have a much bigger chance to survive anyway.

in fact, i probably would be able to teach them basic rocketry and flight. (i'm studying aviation).
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby zimmah on Wed Aug 15, 2012 5:06 pm

Army of GOD wrote:
nietzsche wrote:
InkL0sed wrote:If I traveled to the past, I'd teach them to worship my penis.


Of all the responses, this is the most impossible. Even crispybits' idea of splitting the atom with 12 A.D tools seems more plausible.


When I was younger and I first learned what fission was, I thought a very sharp nail swung into a hard surface by a very strong person could, potentially, cause a nuclear explosion.


you have to aim very carefully.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby BigBallinStalin on Wed Aug 15, 2012 5:13 pm

zimmah wrote:
BigBallinStalin wrote:
crispybits wrote:Naah just teach them a few basic boatbuilding techniques and how to make effective marine weaponry, and tell them that the death of their culture will come in boats from the east and they should continue to make boatbuilding / marine weaponry advances and patrol the shoreline and sink anyone that tries to sail in too close.


Sounds easy.

Um, how does one build a frigate/man-of-war? And won't we need the relevant industries? Then there's military doctrine to be learned, transmitted, then practiced...

And then we'd have to somehow change the way they value life (or production and consumption/investment). Not an easy feat.


cannons are the most important thing, they'd have plenty of time to fill the entire shoreline with huge cannons so that ships won't even be able to come close.

in fact, using dutch polders they could theoretically create artificial islands in front of the shore and mount huge cannons on there and whoever comes close will be forced to retreat.

also, it's not like it's that hard to make a wooden ship if you backwards-engineer it. in fact, maybe a catamaran would even outclass the 17th and 18th century ships near the shores, (they are easy to build, and fast, stable and agile, not to forget it can actually maneuver in shallow waters, unlike bigger ships) they may not be very useful for intercontinental journeys though, because the storage room for food and other needs would be too small.

if you really want to get nasty, you could even take some very basic knowledge to create biological weapons like anthrax (or any lethal bacteria really), if you're just careful enough not to get killed by it yourself, but with our superior knowledge on personal hygiene, we should have a much bigger chance to survive anyway.

in fact, i probably would be able to teach them basic rocketry and flight. (i'm studying aviation).


Have fun single-handedly building all the requisite industries!
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby heavycola on Wed Aug 15, 2012 5:21 pm

BigBallinStalin wrote:
zimmah wrote:
BigBallinStalin wrote:
crispybits wrote:Naah just teach them a few basic boatbuilding techniques and how to make effective marine weaponry, and tell them that the death of their culture will come in boats from the east and they should continue to make boatbuilding / marine weaponry advances and patrol the shoreline and sink anyone that tries to sail in too close.


Sounds easy.

Um, how does one build a frigate/man-of-war? And won't we need the relevant industries? Then there's military doctrine to be learned, transmitted, then practiced...

And then we'd have to somehow change the way they value life (or production and consumption/investment). Not an easy feat.


cannons are the most important thing, they'd have plenty of time to fill the entire shoreline with huge cannons so that ships won't even be able to come close.

in fact, using dutch polders they could theoretically create artificial islands in front of the shore and mount huge cannons on there and whoever comes close will be forced to retreat.

also, it's not like it's that hard to make a wooden ship if you backwards-engineer it. in fact, maybe a catamaran would even outclass the 17th and 18th century ships near the shores, (they are easy to build, and fast, stable and agile, not to forget it can actually maneuver in shallow waters, unlike bigger ships) they may not be very useful for intercontinental journeys though, because the storage room for food and other needs would be too small.

if you really want to get nasty, you could even take some very basic knowledge to create biological weapons like anthrax (or any lethal bacteria really), if you're just careful enough not to get killed by it yourself, but with our superior knowledge on personal hygiene, we should have a much bigger chance to survive anyway.

in fact, i probably would be able to teach them basic rocketry and flight. (i'm studying aviation).


Have fun single-handedly building all the requisite industries!


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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby BigBallinStalin on Wed Aug 15, 2012 5:27 pm

I stand corrected.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby zimmah on Wed Aug 15, 2012 5:32 pm

BigBallinStalin wrote:
zimmah wrote:
BigBallinStalin wrote:
crispybits wrote:Naah just teach them a few basic boatbuilding techniques and how to make effective marine weaponry, and tell them that the death of their culture will come in boats from the east and they should continue to make boatbuilding / marine weaponry advances and patrol the shoreline and sink anyone that tries to sail in too close.


Sounds easy.

Um, how does one build a frigate/man-of-war? And won't we need the relevant industries? Then there's military doctrine to be learned, transmitted, then practiced...

And then we'd have to somehow change the way they value life (or production and consumption/investment). Not an easy feat.


cannons are the most important thing, they'd have plenty of time to fill the entire shoreline with huge cannons so that ships won't even be able to come close.

in fact, using dutch polders they could theoretically create artificial islands in front of the shore and mount huge cannons on there and whoever comes close will be forced to retreat.

also, it's not like it's that hard to make a wooden ship if you backwards-engineer it. in fact, maybe a catamaran would even outclass the 17th and 18th century ships near the shores, (they are easy to build, and fast, stable and agile, not to forget it can actually maneuver in shallow waters, unlike bigger ships) they may not be very useful for intercontinental journeys though, because the storage room for food and other needs would be too small.

if you really want to get nasty, you could even take some very basic knowledge to create biological weapons like anthrax (or any lethal bacteria really), if you're just careful enough not to get killed by it yourself, but with our superior knowledge on personal hygiene, we should have a much bigger chance to survive anyway.

in fact, i probably would be able to teach them basic rocketry and flight. (i'm studying aviation).


Have fun single-handedly building all the requisite industries!


i'm not talking about f-16 shit, just the basics. anything that flies high enough to avoid cannons and early guns would suffice, and rockets aren't too hard either.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby BigBallinStalin on Wed Aug 15, 2012 5:41 pm

Yeah the basics. Like drydocks, lumber mills, skilled craftsmen, dockyards, textile industry with skilled labor for the sails, masonry industry/engineering, and for anthrax, that should be just as simple too.

So, what do we have to work with?

Oh right, groups of people who have been fighting each other for centuries, are unskilled for the above tasks, and have cultural attitudes which would object to "exploiting" natural resources.

Good luck! :D
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby zimmah on Wed Aug 15, 2012 6:03 pm

BigBallinStalin wrote:Yeah the basics. Like drydocks, lumber mills, skilled craftsmen, dockyards, textile industry with skilled labor for the sails, masonry industry/engineering, and for anthrax, that should be just as simple too.

So, what do we have to work with?

Oh right, groups of people who have been fighting each other for centuries, are unskilled for the above tasks, and have cultural attitudes which would object to "exploiting" natural resources.

Good luck! :D


a few 'magic' tricks is all you really need to fool those natives for long enough to make some progress, after that you've accomplished enough to be off the hook.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby BigBallinStalin on Wed Aug 15, 2012 6:37 pm

You got me!


I'm just jealous because I don't know any magic... :(
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby jgordon1111 on Wed Aug 15, 2012 6:50 pm

zimmah wrote:
BigBallinStalin wrote:
zimmah wrote:
BigBallinStalin wrote:
crispybits wrote:Naah just teach them a few basic boatbuilding techniques and how to make effective marine weaponry, and tell them that the death of their culture will come in boats from the east and they should continue to make boatbuilding / marine weaponry advances and patrol the shoreline and sink anyone that tries to sail in too close.


Sounds easy.

Um, how does one build a frigate/man-of-war? And won't we need the relevant industries? Then there's military doctrine to be learned, transmitted, then practiced...

And then we'd have to somehow change the way they value life (or production and consumption/investment). Not an easy feat.


cannons are the most important thing, they'd have plenty of time to fill the entire shoreline with huge cannons so that ships won't even be able to come close.

in fact, using dutch polders they could theoretically create artificial islands in front of the shore and mount huge cannons on there and whoever comes close will be forced to retreat.

also, it's not like it's that hard to make a wooden ship if you backwards-engineer it. in fact, maybe a catamaran would even outclass the 17th and 18th century ships near the shores, (they are easy to build, and fast, stable and agile, not to forget it can actually maneuver in shallow waters, unlike bigger ships) they may not be very useful for intercontinental journeys though, because the storage room for food and other needs would be too small.

if you really want to get nasty, you could even take some very basic knowledge to create biological weapons like anthrax (or any lethal bacteria really), if you're just careful enough not to get killed by it yourself, but with our superior knowledge on personal hygiene, we should have a much bigger chance to survive anyway.

in fact, i probably would be able to teach them basic rocketry and flight. (i'm studying aviation).


Have fun single-handedly building all the requisite industries!


i'm not talking about f-16 shit, just the basics. anything that flies high enough to avoid cannons and early guns would suffice, and rockets aren't too hard either.


See always some negativity going on,right track zimmah hot air ballons and molotov cocktails should do the trick to start out. not that difficult to devise. Float over them out of range height wise, and drop about 25 cocktails on'em with a little white phosphorus,done deal for the ships,then just wait on shore for the swimmers,good labor force build up or just wipe em out. just make sure none ever get away.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby zimmah on Wed Aug 15, 2012 7:14 pm

How did I not think of that. Simple but effective.
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby comic boy on Wed Aug 15, 2012 7:39 pm

Forget about 2000 years , just transport me back one week armed with the winning numbers from last Fridays Euro millions draw :D
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Re: If you traveled ~2000 years in the past ...

Postby Army of GOD on Wed Aug 15, 2012 7:44 pm

how many future technologies will we be able to discover before our king dies?
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