Let's talk about something important

by **Haggis_McMutton** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 11:30 am

Namely, the legal status of necrophilia.

Any particular reason why it should be illegal ? How about if the previous owner of the corpse consented to being buggered?

I think David Mitchell makes a convincing argument for the addition of a box to tick indicating that you don't mind if some poor soul has his way with your mortal remains:

by **aage** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 11:43 am

I agree we should talk about something important. For instance, it seems one of the users of this forum has a crush on David Mitchell.

by **Haggis_McMutton** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 11:46 am

aage wrote:I agree we should talk about something important. For instance, it seems one of the users of this forum has a crush on David Mitchell.

David Mitchell's persona anyway.

The real David Mitchell sold out when he lost a couple pounds, got engaged and (worst of all) grew a fashionable beard. hypocrite.

by **AndyDufresne** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 12:23 pm

The deterioration of the body is a bit of an issue. But if you got the cadaver taxidermied, then all would be well and fine?

--Andy

by **MegaProphet** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 12:36 pm

It's icky, but that doesn't mean it should be illegal as long as the previous owner consents. I quite like David Mitchell as well

by **AndyDufresne** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 12:44 pm

I remember years ago I got Marilyn Manson's "autobiography" as a joke gift. I recall thumbing through it and reading some short story he included in it. Pretty sure it involved some hot necrophilia action described in detail, with lots of jizz in the story.

--Andy

by **2dimes** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 12:54 pm

by **Haggis_McMutton** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 1:17 pm

AndyDufresne wrote:The deterioration of the body is a bit of an issue. But if you got the cadaver taxidermied, then all would be well and fine?

--Andy

No worries, I have it on good authority that different kinds of necrophiliacs enjoy the company of bodies in different states of disrepair, going all the way down to those who have a thing for skeletons.

So really, with some careful planning, your body could enjoy the gentle caress of another human being for many months after your death.

Edit: Also

by **TA1LGUNN3R** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 1:52 pm

Haggis wrote:So really, with some careful planning, your body could enjoy the gentle caress of another human being for many months after your death.

So potentially I could score more in death than while alive. Sweet!

-TG

by **AndyDufresne** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 2:26 pm

I have a question. For female cadavers, it is pretty straightforward. But for male cadavers, how would the partner deal with flaccidity? Have you encountered any solutions in your research, Haggis?

--Andy

by **2dimes** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 2:30 pm

Rigor mortis?

by **aage** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 2:49 pm

2dimes wrote:Rigor mortis?

Unfortunately rigor mortis only affects the muscles. Unfortunately, the only muscles in an erection are those around arteries... and there aren't a lot of them. Since the blood would flow away through the veins which don't have an awful lot of muscles around them this wouldn't fix anything.

Rigor mortis might actually block necrophilia completely since a woman's body would also go... stiff...

Of course, you could just put a stick in it or something.

by **Lootifer** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 4:03 pm

aage wrote:Of course, you could just put a stick in it or something.

Good thinking, like a kebab skewer stright down the japs eye!

(too far? I did have trouble typing that...)

by **saxitoxin** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 4:25 pm

aage wrote:the only muscles in an erection are those around arteries

What about Lootifer? Word on the street is that he spends a lot of time in the gym, which I imagine goes something like this.

by **Army of GOD** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 6:09 pm

My body is going to the highest bidder.

by **saxitoxin** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 6:21 pm

Army of GOD wrote:My body is going to the highest bidder.

$3

by **Symmetry** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 6:25 pm

saxitoxin wrote:
Army of GOD wrote:My body is going to the highest bidder.

$3

$2.50 (I want it to go to Saxi)

by **Haggis_McMutton** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 6:26 pm

AndyDufresne wrote:I have a question. For female cadavers, it is pretty straightforward. But for male cadavers, how would the partner deal with flaccidity? Have you encountered any solutions in your research, Haggis?

--Andy

That's a complex and divisive issue in the necrophiliac community. In order to get a full, unbiased, view of the issue, I'd recommend you pick up one of these:

by **saxitoxin** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 7:42 pm

Symmetry wrote:
saxitoxin wrote:
Army of GOD wrote:My body is going to the highest bidder.

$3

$2.50 (I want it to go to Saxi)

That's okay, if I win I'll let you have a few minutes with it when I'm done. That goes for everyone - 50-cents a ride (except for Serbia - $2 because he'll stretch it out and decrease its saleability).

by **Symmetry** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 7:53 pm

saxitoxin wrote:
Symmetry wrote:
saxitoxin wrote:
Army of GOD wrote:My body is going to the highest bidder.

$3

$2.50 (I want it to go to Saxi)

That's okay, if I win I'll let you have a few minutes with it when I'm done. That goes for everyone - 50-cents a ride (except for Serbia - $2 because he'll stretch it out and decrease its saleability).

$3.50

by **saxitoxin** on Thu Apr 18, 2013 7:56 pm

Symmetry wrote:
saxitoxin wrote:
Symmetry wrote:
saxitoxin wrote:
Army of GOD wrote:My body is going to the highest bidder.

$3

$2.50 (I want it to go to Saxi)

That's okay, if I win I'll let you have a few minutes with it when I'm done. That goes for everyone - 50-cents a ride (except for Serbia - $2 because he'll stretch it out and decrease its saleability).

$3.50